


Identity Crisis

by Griddlebone



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drama, F/M, False Memories, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Romance, Self-Doubt, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-03
Updated: 2010-05-03
Packaged: 2017-10-09 07:05:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 77,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/84341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Griddlebone/pseuds/Griddlebone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A demon captures Sango, and she spends the next 15 chapters being a baby about it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

There was silence at the camp for a long time after Kagome stormed off into the night. Inuyasha huffed, but everyone knew it was only a matter of time before he went off after her; and when he did finally slink away, Sango was prudently looking away, the monk appeared to be deep in meditation, and both Kirara and Shippo were to all appearances sound asleep on Sango's lap. Not a one of them so much as twitched as the hanyou disappeared into the darkness beyond the fire's light.

Sango's face held a strange mix of emotions as she clandestinely watched Inuyasha leave. There was gladness, that the hanyou was finally going to Kagome and the rest of their group would have some peace and quiet. But there was also, more disconcertingly, jealousy and more than a little loneliness. Miroku pretended not to see these things, the way he pretended not to know what Kagome and Inuyasha were doing together in the woods, out of earshot.

He kept up a carefully neutral façade and was glad of Shippo's presence that handily prevented any detailed conversation regarding the obvious topic at hand. Then again, without the distraction of Shippo, he would have been free to commence more important pursuits, like seducing Sango. So they sat in more or less companionable silence until at last the young demon fell asleep; Miroku was content to let it wait a while longer, no perverted comments just yet, but it seemed Sango was not.

She had been clearly agitated all evening, quiet and withdrawn even by her own standards. This he had carefully ignored, though he had wondered at the cause. At first he had been sure it was something to do with Kohaku, but the look in her eyes and the way she stared out into the darkness where first Kagome and then Inuyasha had vanished told a somewhat different story. Was it worry for her friends, or something else entirely that brought about that look?

"How long do you think they'll keep this up?" Sango asked suddenly, catching him off guard. He looked at her in surprise. That sour tone was usually reserved for him, when she caught his hand wandering where she did not want it. To hear it directed at Kagome and Inuyasha was something of a shock.

"Keep what up, Sango?" he pressed, knowing the answer, really just trying to see if he could fluster her. It was a loaded question, one he rather suspected would discomfit her. The slayer grew embarrassed at the slightest mention of intimate activities, though the rosy tint it lent her cheeks was quite endearing. He wanted to see if she would become nervous or angry. Shippo was momentarily sleeping, but he might come awake at any moment if their voices grew too loud, and Kirara was staring at them with her huge red eyes. The demon cat seemed oddly aware of what was being said.

Sango looked away, though the redness creeping across her cheeks was still obvious. "Running off after a fight, so they can be alone together," she answered finally. Frustrated, she added, "You know what I mean."

It was difficult to maintain an image of innocence under her scrutiny. "I believe they will continue to take refuge in the darkness until they become more comfortable displaying their feelings. They must first come to terms with each other," he said, sincerely.

"It's not safe to split up like this," she protested. It was true enough. Somewhat guiltily, Miroku was aware that he would do the same thing if they would let him get away with it. Kagome's, and especially Sango's enforcement of his chastity was beginning to grate on his nerves. That Sango not only refused to allow him to partake of other women but also denied him from touching her was often infuriating. To an extent he understood that he deserved reprimand for his actions, but he was beginning to wonder if Sango had any sort of urges at all.

Having been silent too long, he sighed. "You know that Inuyasha will protect her, Sango, and we can more than hold our own." Nothing he said seemed to soothe her worry.

Kirara mewed, blinking at her mistress. "I know that," Sango admitted finally. "It's just –"

If she was that upset by Kagome's actions, Miroku thought she needed to discuss it with the other girl. Rather than say this, however, he sought to distract her from her problems. Grinning with deliberate lecherousness, he murmured, "Would you rather they explore their relationship here, rather than running off? I didn't realize you liked to watch, Sango."

"Pervert." Her voice was strained, angry. Shippo stirred uneasily. Miroku was glad that Shippo was sleeping on Sango's lap, preventing her from lashing out at him or shouting. It didn't stop her hands from clenching into angry fists.

"Now, now, Sango, I did not mean to offend." Except that he had, and they both knew it. Throwing her off balance was one of his favorite pastimes.

"Then stop being such a pervert."

"Yeah, Miroku, stop being such a pervert," piped up Shippo, startling both the humans simply by being awake.

They lapsed into silence then, Sango settling into her bedroll with both the demons after a last baleful glare in Miroku's direction. The crackling of the fire did little to distract him from his mental meanderings; though it was something of a treat to have at least a semblance of solitude, he was rather distracted. Sango's reaction to his hints and advances was frustrating, even more so when he knew that Inuyasha and Kagome were off doing what he would have very much liked to do. Pretty words and blushes were all very enticing, but if she kept slapping him and calling him a pervert every time he so much as touched her, he was fairly certain he would lose his mind.

And yet, even as this threatened to drive him mad, he was reluctant to make the changes that would win him a place in Sango's bed. It was a somewhat frightening idea, to give up other women forever, but with Sango constantly on the lookout lest he 'take advantage' of some unsuspecting girl, his prospects were growing slim. It wasn't that he was not attracted to Sango, quite the opposite. She was everything he could have wanted in a woman, except for that damnable avoidance of any sort of physical contact. Still, she had hinted more than once that she would be more willing to accept his advances should the 'perverted' behavior cease. Maybe it was time to give in before his time ran out.

Not quite so resolute in his decision as he might have liked, the monk settled down to keep watch over his companions until morning.


	2. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

The forest was strangely, comfortingly silent. Not that Kagome minded.

She clenched her teeth as she stalked away from the camp, following the path of the small stream through the forest. She wasn't really angry – not that angry, at least – but she needed some time to herself. Lately, after a hard day's travel, the inanity of the camp became stifling, threatening to suffocate her. It was an ever-growing frustration within her, and the only outlet was to get away for a while and have some quiet time to herself in which to brood. That was why she had quarreled with Inuyasha so often lately. It was hard to argue with the others, but Inuyasha made it easy with his naturally gruff and too often callous behavior.

The added bonus to arguing with Inuyasha in particular was what happened when he inevitably came after her, though today he was blessedly slow in following. She paused near the edge of a clearing, stretching her arms and arching her back until it popped. While being carried by Inuyasha was better than the alternative, it certainly became uncomfortable after a while. She flinched when something large moved in the shadows nearby, reaching almost instinctively for the bow she had left back at the camp.

"Hey, don't stop on my account," drawled a familiar voice from somewhere in the darkness. "I was just getting a better look."

"Inuyasha," she scolded, though her voice was warm with affection. "Don't sneak up on me like that!" He came closer then, out into the clearing where the waning moon provided just enough light to see him. His golden eyes were focused solely on her. She shivered under the intensity of that gaze.

He was rough when he pulled her to him, his clawed hands clamping her shoulders, forcing her back to arch as he greedily kissed her, but she liked him rough. Although she might never dare say so aloud, least of all where he could hear her, he was her hanyou. It would be utterly unlike him, and utterly boring, if he were as cautious and careful as a human. It was part of him, and part of what had drawn her to him.

So she kissed him back with as much ardor as she could muster, her lips parting willingly to allow his tongue to enter her mouth. Their tongues twisted together; she might almost call it warring for dominance, but the reality was that it just felt good. Already the argument from earlier was forgotten in favor of the much more pleasant physical sensations of now: his hands releasing her shoulders only to snake downward and fondle her breasts through the material of her shirt, his tongue exploring her mouth and rubbing wetly against hers, the silken strands of his hair between her fingers as she moved her hands stealthily toward her target. So close…

She kissed him harder, pressing her chest up against his and drawing a rumbling growl from deep in his throat. At that moment, as fast as she could, she reached up the last short distance and tweaked his ears. Not too hard, just enough to have the desired effect. He made a sound that, coming from anyone else, might have been called a yelp, but his erection surged against her hip where it was pressed into his groin.

Wet heat blossomed between her legs at his insistent touch. It occurred to her that this powerful reaction was due entirely to her. Suddenly her uniform and underwear felt far too confining; she squirmed against him, eager to feel the touch of skin on skin, but he held her tight, grinding his hips slowly against hers. She moaned softly as he ran his tongue down the side of her neck.

He stayed there for a long time, obviously enjoying her vocal and physical reactions to his gentler ministrations, although he maintained a firm grip on her hips to keep her pressed into him. Kagome shivered in his arms, half wondering if he intended to bite or otherwise mark her. Instead he pulled back slightly, just enough that he could reach up under her shirt to massage her breasts. He was careful not to let his claws harm the delicate flesh as he rolled the taut nipples between his fingers.

She was ready for him now – she had no doubt that he could clearly smell the warm scent of her arousal – just as he was ready for her, but he seemed to feel like trying something a little different. Perhaps it was his human blood, which would be rushing through his veins in a few more nights, or perhaps he just wanted a change of pace; she knew he wouldn't waste much time thinking about it, so she chose to follow suit. That wasn't important, this was.

Their unions were customarily brief; after all, they were often in a rush to get back to the group, or just to keep their trysts under wraps as best as possible. But this time, as if by some unspoken agreement, they were going a little slower, drawing things out a bit more, prolonging the pleasure of their mating for as long as possible. There was an urgency and foreboding, too.

_Make this last. We're nearing civilization again, and when we get there we can't do _this.

Inuyasha ran his tongue along the sensitive flesh of her neck once more before sucking gently; she could feel his lips part in a grin when he felt her shiver again. His hand cupped her breast in just the right way to make her suck in a sudden, deep breath. There were lots of good things about going slow...

The sound of something large and fast charging out of the darkness toward them was most definitely not one of those things. Inuyasha growled, then swore profusely as he hauled Kagome out of the demon's path.

"Wait here," he ordered, depositing her a short distance away. "I'm gonna kill that bastard." He ignored Kagome's shouted plea for him to wait, apparently more intent on destroying the demon that had interrupted his time with his mate than listening to what she had to say.

She knew better than to make a second protest, and resigned herself to waiting. It looked like a boar demon, though she had no idea what might have made it so angry; she had not sensed any youki, and did not think that they were intruding upon its territory. Luckily, it was a weak demon, and not very intelligent. Inuyasha easily dodged its attacks, slipping past its feeble defenses to deliver the deathblow almost as soon as he had left Kagome's side.

"Keh, that was too easy."

Kagome felt her anger surge again. What, was it just some game for him? "Inuyasha!" Her voice was shriller than she had intended, more angry than frustrated. Inuyasha's ears flattened against his head. "How could you just leave me here like this? I don't have a weapon. If that thing had charged me -"

"I'd have killed it long before it could reach you," he cut in. So far as she was concerned, he should be glad she hadn't sat him. Not yet, anyway. If anything was guaranteed to kill the mood, it was that. "Come on, let's get away from this thing," he muttered, eyeing the demon's corpse with annoyance.

He scooped her into his arms and took off into the forest. After an initial, wordless protest, Kagome lapsed into a thoughtful silence. Inuyasha did not immediately make a move, still wary of her anger, and probably all too aware of the dead boar.

He ran for a few minutes, the two of them nearly flying through the dark forest, before lust got the better of him. She had only an instant's warning before she was in his arms again, barely recognizing that he'd first set her down as he kissed the top of her head. "Inuyasha?"

He grunted in response.

"Don't you think we've been running into lots of demons lately? There's no sign of Naraku, but there seem to be demons everywhere... and they don't seem to be after our jewel shards at all..." He squeezed her a little tighter, as if closer contact might distract her from her musings. It was mostly futile.

"I think it's important," she fretted. "We should see what Sango and Miroku think."

"We've got something more important to take care of just now," Inuyasha murmured, moving his hips against hers suggestively. "You can talk to them when you finish what you started."

Before she could protest, he claimed her mouth in a forceful kiss. She struggled at first, determined that duty should take precedence, but when one of his hands slipped up under her skirt to gently stroke her through her underwear, she gave a small moan and opened up to his embrace.

 

It was some time later that Kagome returned to the camp. Miroku cracked an eye open, watching her wake Sango. She was disheveled, just as he had expected, but there was no sign of Inuyasha. Odd.

"Is something the matter Kagome?" he asked, forcing himself to focus on Kagome and not the enticingly bleary-eyed Sango. Kagome's lips were slightly swollen and her hair was mussed; he could not help but think that those features would look equally beautiful on Sango, if not more so. Especially if he was the cause.

Seeing his leer, though misjudging his thoughts (then again, perhaps not), both the girls glared at him.

"Do you think we've run into a lot of demons in this area?" Kagome asked, suddenly sober. "I mean it seems weird. I was attacked by a boar demon –"

"A boar demon? Kagome, you can't keep running off like that," Sango admonished. "Without your bow, you have no way to defend yourself."

Kagome frowned. It was clear that she knew this already and did not entirely appreciate Sango's input on the matter. "Inuyasha saved me. And besides, that's not the point. I didn't sense any demonic aura. It was just suddenly there, with no warning at all. Do you think it might have been something to do with Naraku?" Miroku watched her with a smirk. He had a feeling Inuyasha had done more than just rescue her from a demon.

"I haven't noticed anything unusual," Sango murmured.

Miroku was silent for a long time, thinking, until he realized that the girls were looking at him expectantly. Their expressions were slowly shifting from expectation to disapproval. "Well, I have noticed an –"

Inuyasha had returned to the camp at just that moment to announce, "There's a village close by. We'll head there first thing tomorrow and see if the villagers know anything." Inuyasha's timely entrance had handily spared Miroku from finishing his observation.

"Have you been exploring, Inuyasha?" he asked instead.

"Hn. Somebody has to, since apparently nobody can sense the demons around here. You guys get some rest. I'll keep watch tonight. We'll head out at dawn." With that, he disappeared back into the trees, taking up his customary watchdog position in the darkness above the camp. Sango looked to Kagome and the two seemed to come to a wordless accord, both moving to bed down for the night.

Kagome gently took Shippo, who was still sleeping, from Sango but did not settle far from the slayer. The two girls nearly always slept with their bedrolls close to one another.

Miroku stayed where he was. Kagome's observation was certainly worth mulling over. Something might indeed be amiss. He had sensed no demon either, though it must have come close to their camp. If something strange was going on, that might explain the dark mood that seemed to have fallen over the group lately. He shifted uneasily, discomfited. If there was something out there, it was unreasonably subtle and he did not like it.

Time slipped slowly by and the fire began to dwindle down to embers. He watched passively, unable to clear his mind but choosing not to focus on anything in particular. It seemed sleep would elude him this night. He regretted his nocturnal nature, knowing he needed to rest in case something should happen the next day. He leaned backward against the tree he was sitting below and sighed. If he couldn't get to sleep soon, it promised to be a very long night indeed.

 

"Miroku." He must have dozed off, because he did not remember Sango sneaking over to sit beside him. She looked troubled. "I'm worried about you, Miroku," she continued, glancing modestly away from him. Leave it to Sango to risk her life for him in battle but be shy about showing some concern afterward.

"You should get some rest, Sango." He said it as cheerfully as he could, trying to ignore her proximity. He cursed that he could not be more like Inuyasha and haul his woman off into the forest to make love while the others slept. Unfortunately…

"I could say the same to you, monk."

He turned then, catching her off guard. They stared at each other for a moment before he thought to look away. That was when she did something very surprising: she shifted her weight, leaning toward him in a single fluid motion, until she pressed her lips to his. His eyes went wide. He momentarily caught sight of Sango, cheeks flushed and eyes closed, before returning the kiss.

Her lips parted, allowing him access with his tongue, as she slipped her arms around his neck. He smiled against her lips, pulling her onto his lap before deepening the kiss. It was like a dream. Not only was he kissing Sango – finally! – but she was also not hitting him for the transgression. He didn't waste time wondering what had brought on this sudden change, assuming that it was mainly due to her earlier turmoil, as he cautiously moved a hand lower to rub her butt.

The fabric of her yukata kept her legs trapped together, but he felt himself grow hard at the thought of her straddling his lap while wearing her slayer armor or, better yet, nothing at all. Common sense screamed that it was time to stop this madness before Sango figured out what was going on and brained him with Hiraikotsu, but he couldn't bring himself to pull away from her. One of the arms that had been around his neck shifted, her hand moving to caress down his chest, down to the stiffened arousal between his legs. She grasped at him through is robes, gently massaging. He let out a soft moan.

"Oi, monk."

Miroku's eyes flew open. Inuyasha was peering at him from just inches away, the hanyou's expression a mix of amusement and disgust. Behind him, Sango was sound asleep, one arm flung carelessly over Kirara's small form. He could not see Kagome or Shippo, but had no doubt that they were both still sleeping. In the distance, the sky was just beginning to grow lighter. _A dream, then?_ It wouldn't be the first time.

"Yes, Inuyasha?" He was by now quite skilled at disguising his disappointment.

"Hn." The hanyou looked annoyed. "It'll be time to wake the girls soon. Thought you might want to stop thrashing around and moaning before you embarrass yourself." He grinned suddenly, fangs glinting. "Though on second thought it might be more fun to watch Sango beat you up."

"You have my sincere thanks," Miroku replied amiably. Inuyasha might tease, but wounded pride was much less painful than Sango's fist. As he made his way into the forest, ostensibly after water for cooking breakfast, he heard Inuyasha loudly announce that they would be on their way soon. He could not help but smile. The hanyou might be rough around the edges, but he certainly managed to look out for his friends, even if he did consider certain members of the group entirely too perverted for their own good. If anything, Inuyasha had grown more protective of the group as a whole since he began courting Kagome.

Miroku's good mood evaporated quickly as he moved away from camp. A dream like that, however pleasant, was the last thing he needed right now. Inuyasha may have danced around the subject, but his aim had been to save Miroku the embarrassment of the girls catching him in the midst of a wet dream more than anything else. The monk sighed now, picking his way carefully through the undergrowth. It was just his luck that Sango would only come on to him like that in his dreams, and even then leave him terribly aroused and unsatisfied. Still, it would do him no good at all to be cross with the real Sango, so he made up his mind to be pleasant. That might win him a chance to sit next to Sango at dinner, at least.

What a life, where that was the best he could hope for.

The stream was not far from the campsite, but he walked further than was absolutely necessary just to make sure no one saw anything untoward. Almost without thinking, he rearranged his robes and eased his fingers around his hardened length. He let out a sigh that was half groan as he pumped his hand along the eager flesh. Just thinking back to his dream – and where it might have led, had Inuyasha not interrupted – was enough to put him over the edge and send his seed spurting out and into the dirt along the stream's edge.

That matter settled, he carefully filled the strange plastic vessel with water from the spring, and returned to camp posthaste, only to hear Inuyasha already grousing about the late start. Coming into camp he first noted the conspicuous absence of Sango; Hiraikotsu was leaning up against the tree where she had left it last night and Kirara was watching him with eager red eyes, which meant that Sango had gone off into the forest alone. He almost wished she had gone after him.

Then again, in the interest of self-preservation it was probably for the best that she had not.

Of those that remained, Kagome was strangely silent, but Shippo was adamantly against leaving without breakfast. Miroku had to admit that he would think something was terribly wrong if the two demons did not argue incessantly each morning.

"Now, now," Miroku placated, "If you're going to grumble, you could have gone for water yourself instead of waking me to do it for you." At that Inuyasha huffed, crossed his arms obstinately over his chest, and refused to so much as look at any of the others. His reticence did not bother Miroku. In fact, it was rather to be expected. He might protest, but the sun was still very low in the sky; they had plenty of time.

Kagome, smiling at last, solved the whole problem by producing cups of instant ramen from some hidden pouch within her backpack. She bustled about the camp, setting the water in a small pot to boil over the fire, and doling out a cup of noodles for each person. The immediate change in Inuyasha's behavior was no less astonishing than usual, and all grumbling ceased only to be taken up a few moments later with complaints that the water was taking too long to boil.

Miroku sat down next to Shippo, the young kitsune being remarkably patient, and waited silently for the food to cook. His eyes were focused on the water, waiting with bated breath for the first sign of bubbles; Miroku had to agree that this was the best choice given the situation. Better to say nothing than risk Kagome's wrath at this point.

In less than one day's time, things had gone from suspicious to innocuous and back again. It hardly seemed that anything could be amiss, but Sango's sudden reappearance – in full battle regalia – was a reminder to them all that they needed to be on the alert. She sat next to Kirara, carefully out of reach of Miroku's infamously wandering hands, and gratefully accepted her cup of noodles from Kagome.

The young priestess made a conspicuous show of serving first Sango, then Miroku and Shippo, with the still complaining Inuyasha coming dead last. He did not appear to notice.

They ate in companionable silence, too intent on their meager breakfasts to bother with conversation just yet. There would be plenty of time for that on the road though, predictably, Inuyasha gulped down his entire bowl without so much as pausing for breath. Tossing the empty container carelessly on the ground, he announced, "All right, let's get going."

"Typical," grumbled Shippo, crouching down lower, his face hovering closer to the rim of the ramen cup than before, almost protectively. Miroku could not blame him.

"Inuyasha," he began, struggling for calm. Today was definitely going to be a trying day. He could tell already. "Perhaps it would be wise to be more patient –"

At the same time, Kagome lost her patience. "SIT!"

The resulting faceplant was remarkable. Miroku sighed at having his advice ignored so thoroughly, but glanced sidelong at Sango; the slayer's shoulders slumped in a clear sign of resignation, but she did not look up from her ramen. Focusing on that made it easier to ignore the ridiculous spectacle of Kagome and Inuyasha's latest argument; the strategy seemed to be working for Shippo as well. Unable to suppress a grin, even knowing it would do little for his reputation, Miroku wondered if this argument was intended to provide the excuse for their next excursion into the forest, alone.

Sango must have had a similar thought, for she set her ramen aside unfinished and looked away from the others - Miroku especially. She ran her fingers lightly through Kirara's fur but refused to look at anyone else. Miroku narrowed his eyes. Something was definitely upsetting her. It couldn't be that their conversation from last night was still bothering her, could it?

He had known it would annoy her, but he had not thought that it would affect her so much. Then again, perhaps it was something else entirely that had her so pensive. There was a good chance that it had nothing at all to do with him.

He had hoped to walk next to Sango on their way to the village, but as luck would have it Kagome, with Shippo riding on her shoulder, claimed that spot as soon as they set out and refused to so much as acknowledge Inuyasha's presence.

The rather obvious hint was that Miroku should either try to talk some sense into the hanyou or walk by himself. It was a choice he did not particularly relish. Of course, he himself saw no reason why he could not walk _between_ Kagome and Sango, thereby avoiding Inuyasha's grumpiness altogether. Traveling in the company of two beautiful women was infinitely more enjoyable than the alternative.

Without further comment on the subject, he insinuated himself with Sango on one side and Kagome on the other. The girls were surprisingly tolerant of his presence. They both watched him warily the entire time, as if expecting something untoward.

"I am so misunderstood…"


	3. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

It took just over an hour to get to the next village, which was not bad considering they made the entire trip on foot. With the forest so close on either side of the path, it would have been dangerous for Kirara to fly, and it would have been easy to miss the tiny village among the trees had they been in the air.

The travelers glanced warily about as they came to the tree line; the entire village radiated a sense of oppressiveness. Everything was grimy, darkened as if by soot. Despite the pleasant weather, it felt almost as if the sun had not lit this village in a very long time. The darkness they had all felt in the forest, however vaguely, was magnified here to an almost unbearable intensity.

"Can you feel that?" Kagome asked, her voice hushed.

Sango nodded assent. "I can. It's like a demonic aura, but not. It's not exactly like anything I've encountered before."

"It's weird… Like it's been building for days, so slowly that we weren't even aware of it."

When confronted by the aura in its full strength, it did indeed feel as if they had begun to sense it, and be affected by it, days ago. It was intriguing in its strength and subtlety and, at the same time, it was surprisingly sensual. Miroku had occasionally heard rumors, and had once even encountered something similar in the form of a possessed princess, about demons that lured human prey to their deaths by seducing them. Perhaps this was something like that. There was definitely something seductive in the air.

All things considered, Miroku was fairly certain he now had at least a tentative explanation for Kagome and Inuyasha's constant arguing, as well as their sneaking off to spend time together. He could not help the smirk that scrawled itself across his face, even in the face of Sango's withering glare. Despite the displeasure she was trying to convey, and her professional demon-slayer's demeanor, her expression only confirmed that she was thinking along the same lines. Which, of course, only served to widen his grin.

There were few villagers on the streets, but those few quickly turned away and pretended not to notice the newcomers. The travelers could feel the eyes of innumerable others watching them from dark doorways and through holes in the walls of buildings. Miroku could clearly sense his companions' unease, especially in the girls and Shippo. He had to agree: the place was creepy.

Still, as the group's usual go-between with the villages they visited, he knew it was his job to find out whatever he could about what was going on. He split off from the group - Sango's watchful look not escaping his notice, though he did not let on - and set about finding a likely candidate. He was about to give up when he spotted her, a lovely young woman that was walking down the path by herself.

After a careful and thorough look for any sign of Sango, he strode toward the girl purposefully and took one of her hands in both of his. He remembered his decision of the night before, but figured what Sango did not know would not hurt her. "Would you do me the honor of bearing my child?" He could always insist that the words slipped out as a matter of habit; after all, it was his traditional greeting, at least when introducing himself to beautiful women.

The girl was clearly flustered. "Well, I… that's very forward of you, lord monk."

"My humblest apologies. It is simply that when I meet a girl as lovely as you, I cannot resist," he explained cheerfully. Out of the corner of one eye he saw the rest of the group approaching and, of necessity, was suddenly on his best behavior. "Now, can you tell me… what is the source of the dark aura that surrounds this place?"

She would not look at him, even going so far as to pull her hand away. "I-it started a while ago," she stammered, clearly telling him something she had been ordered not to. "I've been told it began in the village just north of here, and it's been spreading ever since." Her hands were clasped just below her mouth; the villagers were obviously not unaware of what was going on, they were simply unable to do anything about it.

"Don't you worry," he said soothingly. "My friends and I will take care of it – that's what we do. How far is it to this village you speak of?"

 

Not far, as it turned out. Villagers were always saying that when asked how far away something was, but in this case they were not exactly lying. The proper road that went to the next village meandered across the countryside before reentering the forest, but there was a smaller path that followed a much more direct route. As soon as it was discovered that the travelers intended to rid the area of the source of its trouble, the villagers were eager to show them the way.

All in all, Sango thought it well done. It was probably a trap, of course, but at least they were headed in what was presumably the right direction now. And Kagome and Inuyasha appeared to be on speaking terms once more.

Midday came and went, and still the path wound its way into the forest. Afternoon was well on its way before they came to the first clearing; it did not take them long to realize that something was amiss. Inuyasha had been on the alert for quite some time, but had stuck with the group at Kagome's insistence. Everyone froze as a sudden crash echoed through the otherwise silent forest.

Kagome closed her eyes, concentrating hard, and found what she was looking for: youki. "It's another demon!" she called out, uselessly. The thing, another boar demon, had already noticed the trespassers and was charging straight at them.

Inuyasha cursed the ever-changing wind for not carrying the demon's scent to him sooner, and readied Tetsusaiga. He did not seem to care that the others had also been oblivious until the creature was practically on top of them; it only mattered that he had been unaware. "Haven't we run into enough of these things already?"

"I'll take care of it," Sango grumbled, her bad mood obvious to all and only spurred on by Inuyasha's grouchiness. Inuyasha opened his mouth to voice an annoyed protest, but Sango was already mid-attack. The forest was close against the path, leaving little room for an attack with Hiraikotsu, but she attempted it anyway. Getting into close enough range to use her sword would almost certainly mean injury. And so with long-honed precision, she hurled the boomerang so that it slammed directly into the demon's snout with a sickening crack, easily avoiding the encroaching vegetation.

It was clear from the first blow that she had the advantage, and she made short work of dispatching the creature, though her mood showed no sign of improvement for the effort. Her little display did nothing to improve Inuyasha's temper either; the hanyou grumbled the whole time, impatient at being excluded.

At the final blow, Hiraikotsu bounced off the demon's hide and into the forest; the boar toppled over and did not move even to draw breath.

When the dust settled, it was clear that although the demon was dead, they were not alone.

A small group of humans was watching them. They had obviously been tracking the demon with the intention of killing it, at least to judge by the weapons they carried and the armor they wore. Calmly ignoring the looks of surprise and outright stares from the human group, Sango went to retrieve her weapon.

One of the men, presumably the leader, called to her. "Stop! Who are you, that you could defeat such a demon on your own?"

"I'm a demon slayer," she explained curtly, more intent on finding her weapon than answering questions. Finally locating Hiraikotsu, nearly half embedded in the soft earth from the force of her final blow, she set about freeing it. It took an absurd amount of effort to pull the weapon free, at least so far as she was concerned. She must have been angrier than she thought when she threw it, to put that much force into it.

"A demon slayer? I'd heard they were all dead." This earned a scowl from Sango, which only deepened when the man continued, "And you travel in the company of demons?"

"Yes, I do," she said, her tone dangerous, as she came to stand with her friends again.

Wisely, the men did not seem inclined to ask more questions. After a brief discussion, the group seemed to come to a decision. Their leader stepped forward. "No mind, you are still responsible for saving our village from the ravages of this demon, and we will honor your victory with a feast and our hospitality. If you would follow us back to our village…"

 

The village was larger than they had thought it would be, considering how tiny the previous village had been, and appeared to have once been prosperous. One of the men had explained that, a few months back, a strange presence had made itself known in the vicinity, and had eventually scared off all the traders and merchants that might otherwise have wandered through. Having seen no demons himself, the man confided that he would have thought the whole thing a ridiculous rumor were it not for the sense of despair that grew stronger the closer one got to the village.

To the travelers, more experienced in battling demons, it sounded a lot like a demon infestation. After they were settled at the village's best inn, Inuyasha and Kagome headed off to investigate and explore the village, leaving their companions to rest.

All of which left Sango in a rather uncomfortable predicament.

She was standing on the inn's spacious porch, leaning against one of the thick pillars that supported the building's roof. Out of the corner of one eye, she was watching Miroku. It was not obvious, because she spent most of the time carefully surveying the village around them, but she did not quite trust him sitting so close behind her, even if he did insist that he was meditating.

The village was currently bustling with activity in preparation for the night's feast in her honor, but Sango felt that something seemed amiss. She frowned, unable to put her finger on exactly what was bothering her.

She felt restless, and could not seem to stop fidgeting. She knew that, as good guests, they were supposed to wait patiently while the feast was prepared, but she itched to do something in the meantime. But with Kagome and Inuyasha wandered off to explore, taking Shippo with them at her request, she was left with only Miroku to talk to. She supposed that even if he was not busily pretending to be meditating she would have a hard time talking to him. She was still a bit angry over the way he had teased her the night before, and besides, he always put a perverted spin on everything. Well, almost always. Often enough to be annoying, at least.

Sango sighed. Nothing could ever be clear-cut with Miroku.

"Is something the matter, Sango?" Miroku, finally having given up on the pretense of meditation, came to stand beside her.

She glanced at him sidelong. "I thought you were meditating."

His voice serious, he informed her, "That is how I knew you were upset. Your aura shifted and -"

"I don't want to hear it, monk."

"Why Sango, what has gotten into you?" His voice was playful, but it did not escape her notice that the hand closest to her had curled into a tight fist.

"I don't know what you mean."

They lapsed into silence then, the kind of awkward silence that made Sango want to slink away and pretend the conversation had never happened.

Finally, Miroku spoke up. "I am truly sorry if what I said last night offended you."

That caught her somewhat off guard. It was not really so much the apology - Miroku was always apologizing for something, or making excuses for his bad behavior - but the seriousness in his voice. It sounded as if he might really mean it.

"I- I'm not offended," she protested, awkwardly and too late. No, it was not entirely his fault that she was feeling so strangely; he was just not making it any better.

She did not want to, but felt compelled to look at him. His gaze was serious, even more so than his voice. "If you insist. But surely you've noticed that you have been acting on edge lately."

Her face flushed a little bit. If she was acting on edge, it was only because everything around her was so weird lately. Weird seemed a safe word for what she had been feeling. It was better to ignore what she had actually been feeling, and just call the whole thing weird, than to admit that she had wondered, more than once over the past couple of days, what it would be like to sneak off into the forest with Miroku the way Kagome did with Inuyasha.

What would Miroku do, if she agreed to go with him? Would he kiss her, touch her all over? What would that feel like? Surely it could be no less exciting than what her mind dreamed up. Her whole body felt warm at the thought, a deeper longing settling low in her belly, between her legs.

She shook her head in an attempt to clear it, deliberately ignoring the scrutiny with which Miroku was observing her.

"Sango. Are you feeling all right?"

"Y-yes. I'm fine. Why do you keep asking?" He had startled her again, though she was loathe to admit it.

"It's just that I'm worried about you," he admitted. "It seems that something has to be bothering you, for you to be acting like this."

She wished he wouldn't pry so much. "I'd like to have a look around the village." Changing the subject seemed like a safe idea.

Miroku took the hint, though she caught the cautious expression on his face before he managed to completely mask it with cheerful impassivity. "Ah, but then you would interfere with Inuyasha and Kagome's 'alone time,'" he sneered, hoping to amuse her.

She grinned right back. "That's why I sent Shippo with them. If they want to keep me penned up 'resting' here, then they can watch after the kitsune so I actually can get some rest."

For a long moment her only answer was a low chuckle from the monk. "You do realize that your diabolical plan has left you all alone with me?"

When he spoke his breath was hot against the skin of her neck, and she realized that over the course of their conversation he had been inching slowly closer to her. And now he was standing very close to her indeed; too close. Her whole body was heated from the not-quite contact. Suddenly terrified, she knew she had to get away before things got out of hand.

He took a deep breath, almost as if he were smelling her. She almost thought she heard him whisper her name. She wanted to move, to edge slowly away from him, but was caught with the support beam on one side and Miroku on the other. It was taking all of her willpower not to squirm uncomfortably. Ever so reluctantly she had to admit that she was curious as to what he might do next; a simple movement of his arms, and she would be trapped, not exactly unwillingly, in his embrace. But he did not move.

_Why isn't he doing anything_, she wondered, refusing to give her annoyance deeper thought, lest she be forced to admit that she actually did want him to do something. _I'll never understand that man!_

The longer he remained so close to her, the more certain she became that he was going to do something that would annoy her - instead of the vague and ethereal something she _wanted _him to do - which would almost certainly involve his hand and her ass. Her lips twisted into a frown just as the innkeeper's daughter burst out from within the building to announce that the feast was nearly ready. The instant he heard footsteps coming their way, Miroku had quickly stepped away from her. She felt his absence more keenly than she would have liked.

Sango sent Kirara to round up the other members of their group, though it was some time before the rather harried demon returned with Kagome, Inuyasha, and Shippo in tow. Apparently Inuyasha had done everything in his considerable power to get Shippo to leave him and Kagome alone, and Shippo could not seem to stop talking about it despite Kagome's blushes and Inuyasha's insistence that he shut up.

Sango found herself giggling at their antics, but the good mood evaporated quickly once they joined the rest of the villagers in the inn's common room for the feast. Inuyasha immediately reverted to his ordinary, grumpy self, embarrassing the rest of the group, especially when he pointed out, rather loudly, that Sango was getting special treatment. Knowing that he was correct only made Sango feel worse.

Kagome sat by in silence, remarkably composed, before urging Sango to enjoy her status as village hero. "It's nice to be appreciated!" she quipped cheerfully, narrowing her eyes at Inuyasha.

Deciding it was probably safest to avoid asking why Kagome was hinting at Inuyasha that she was not appreciated enough, Sango focused on her food. As the hero who had actually slain the demon, she was entitled to larger portions than the others, although she had protested, and had also been given a dish that the locals explained was a delicacy reserved only for certain special occasions.

It was a nondescript dish of rice and vegetables, though it smelled as if it were strongly seasoned. Sango was not quite sure that she wanted to try it, wondering vaguely what the ingredients might be, but she caught Miroku watching her out of the corner of one eye. She wondered whether he wanted her to eat it or to back out, or share with the rest of the group.

She had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach when the headman approached her. He was a handsome man, in a way, she thought. But what made her uncomfortable was the sense that she no longer had a choice as to whether or not to eat the hero's food.

"Honored slayer, please eat!" the headman urged, watching her intently. He almost looked as if he were about to clasp her hands in his and plead more formally. She wanted to look to Kagome or Miroku for advice but knew it would be rude to do so.

She bowed her head, muttered something that might have been an affirmative, and set to eating. It was spicy and hot, but certainly not bad. Sango found herself almost laughing at her earlier trepidation. When had she become so suspicious of the hospitality of others?

With that settled, the rest of the feast passed by quickly and relatively comfortably. Sango even offered some of the special 'hero's' dish to the others once she had eaten her fill, though under Kagome's stern glare they politely - or impolitely and begrudgingly, in Inuyasha's case - declined. When the food was finally gone, the travelers were shown to the rooms they would share; for propriety's sake, Kagome, Sango, and Kirara would share one room, with Inuyasha, Miroku, and Shippo in an adjacent room.

Before she could enter the room with the others, the headman pulled Sango aside. He gave no indication of what might be going on until they rounded the corner and were completely alone. "Would you do me the honor of joining me tonight, honored hero?" he asked, his voice hushed but almost... urgent.

A bit stunned by the sudden request, Sango could only shake her head no. She pulled away from him even as his grip tightened on her hand, and fled back to Kagome and the others. Best not to be caught alone, if that was his intention.

"What was that about?" Kagome asked as Sango, gratefully, slid the door shut behind her.

"Nothing," Sango murmured, hoping that would be the end of it. For once, mercifully, it was.

Everything was quiet, almost subdued, as the girls prepared for bed and settled into their respective futons. Kagome was asleep in minutes, the even sound of her breathing sounded comforting to Sango, but the slayer could not get to sleep. Kirara curled up next to her, purring, and allowed Sango to pet her. Sango watched the cat demon with interest as she ran her fingers through the thick fur.

It was a long time before sleep finally claimed her.

 

Sango had no intention of leaving the room that night, despite the headman's invitation, but she felt strangely compelled. It was as if she watched herself rise from the futon and sneak away without so much as rousing Kirara. Even if she wanted to cry out for help, she was trapped and her throat closed tightly against the slightest noise. Slowly, surely, she walked to the headman's elegant home; her mind struggled against whatever spell bound her but could not regain control.

The guards - she thought it a bit odd that the headman's household had armed guards, considering the size of the village – admitted her wordlessly, as if they did not even see her. The headman himself was waiting for her in the courtyard. She could not remember his name, but knew it was unimportant. He offered an arm and asked, "Shall we take a walk, my lady?" Against her will and better judgment, she accepted.

As he led her out into the forest, his grip firm on her wrist, she cursed her own foolishness, for now she was well and truly trapped. If they had stayed in the village there was always the chance that Inuyasha or Miroku might hear something amiss, but if something happened to her in the forest there was little chance that her friends, much less any human, would overhear. Where was Miroku when she actually needed his help?

Instead she was forced to follow docilely and pray she could regain control of herself before something awful happened – and if the headman's behavior at dinner was any indication of his intentions, she thought she knew what he had in mind. And she wanted no part of it. She kept her ears open for any sign that her friends were aware that she was missing; everything was quiet save the soft sounds of the forest around them.

And when he opened a trap door in the middle of nowhere, she despaired. If no one was going to save her and she could not break free on her own, she would just have to endure. But instead of ushering her into the tunnel, he merely stood back and held the door open, leaving her to stand in front of the gaping hole in the ground and wonder what was going on.

There was no ladder at all, as if someone had covered up a hole in the ground rather than a manmade passage. It could almost be confused for an animal's den, were it not for the obviously human-created covering and the fact that it extended straight down into the ground. As she watched, the headman slowly slipped away, leaving her alone with the hole, but still unable to control her actions.

For a long, uncomfortable moment nothing happened. And then enormous arms, snakelike but unlike any animal or demon Sango had ever seen, swept out of the hole, catching hold of her, dragging her down. Worst of all, she could not even struggle.

Panic and instinct won out over whatever spell had gripped her. Even if she could not fight, she had to at least alert the others. She screamed as the monster pulled her into the abyss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 04/2016 - Many thanks to Gabby for the gift of some [delightful fan art](http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd20/eggplantlady/Identity%20Crisis%20ch2%20Gabby%20ForeverMirSan_zpsjfmvmizm.png) based on a scene from this chapter.


	4. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Footsteps.

Miroku opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling for several moments. Yes, he definitely heard footsteps. As quietly as possible, so as to avoid disturbing Inuyasha any more than was necessary, he slipped out of his futon and slid the door open.

He peered around for a moment before finding what he was looking for. Sango had just walked past, wearing only the white yukata that the innkeeper had provided. She was heading away from the clustered huts where the villagers resided, and toward the headman's house. Unable to believe what he had seen, he slipped out the door and followed her; it seemed so unlike Sango for her to do something like this. He had to see with his own eyes what she intended to do. If he did not see for himself, there was no way he could believe it.

A quick glance at the nearby tree where Inuyasha was sitting indicated that the hanyou was awake and watching them after all. Gold eyes glittered faintly as they watched. Indeed, the smug look on his face seemed to say, _"I know what you two are up to." _As he followed Sango, Miroku wished that the hanyou's guess was correct, but could not ignore his own sense of foreboding. Something definitely felt amiss here.

There was no way that Sango was brave enough to sneak out of her room at the inn and meet up with the village headman, and yet it was plain to see. The few guards - he found himself wondering why, in such a quiet village, the headman's home was so closely guarded even after its demon had been defeated - admitted Sango without question, only to ignore her a few moments later when she emerged with the headman himself as her escort. Together they headed into the forest, the headman clutching Sango close to him.

Miroku frowned as something dark and very like jealousy prickled at his consciousness. Somewhere along the line, he had convinced himself that he was the only possible object of Sango's affections. There had been precious little to call that belief into question, but now he found himself wondering if perhaps he had been overconfident. It had simply never occurred to him that Sango might ever be seriously interested in another man. And yet there it was, right in front of him. But why? And when had they arranged for such a meeting that he had not noticed it happening right under his nose?

The more he thought about it, the stranger it seemed that they would head not into the mansion but out into the forest. He watched, edging closer, as the two walked away from him, and resolved not to spy – not too much, at least. After all, she deserved to have her happiness uninterrupted, even if the circumstances of it bothered him. Who was he to say what she could and could not do based only on suspicions and strange moods?

And yet… Something just did not feel right.

Perhaps the headman had lured her with the ruse of a demon that needed slaying. Miroku shook his head; the man had barely even spoken to Sango since their group had arrived in the village, and he had been with her the entire time and had heard nothing. She would not go to battle without her weapons or armor. He could not think of any reason why she might have snuck out like this... except, as much as it galled him, a tryst.

Torn between risking Sango's ire by following her and the same outcome by not following her and allowing her to go unaided into danger, Miroku hesitated. Murmured voices in the distance behind him told him that Kagome was awake and had also noticed Sango's strange absence - she was probably asking Inuyasha what he had seen. All of this made his prospects for the rest of the night appear even more bleak; with a sigh of resignation, Miroku chose the lesser evil and headed back toward his room. Sango was a capable warrior, and he knew she could take care of herself. That did not stop him from worrying. He traveled slowly, not wanting to admit defeat in his pursuit of Sango and still sorely tempted to follow her.

But could he stand to spy on her? He did not think so, but knew that he would not be able to sleep for a while yet anyway. Already the thought of it was gnawing at him.

Inuyasha was still up in his tree, but now Kagome and the others had joined him, gathering restlessly around the base of the tree. Kirara was especially agitated. She clearly did not like her mistress's sudden disappearance.

Suddenly her ears twitched and she leapt from Kagome's arms, transforming before she even hit the ground. Miroku himself was only a short distance away - and was very nearly singed by the flames of her transformation - when he thought he heard something. It sounded faint, like a faraway scream, and it came from the forest in the direction Sango and the headman had been going. _What was - ?_

He was interrupted mid-thought by the hanyou's growl. So Inuyasha had heard something too.

He leapt out of the tree, muttering, "What are you waiting for, monk? Are you deaf? Sango's in trouble – come on!"

Miroku knew Inuyasha was right; there were not many things that could make Sango scream like that, and upon reflection he was not entirely sure he was ready to face one of them. A twisted, frightening feeling had him reaching for his staff - who knew what they might be up against? - which had been propped just inside the door to his room, before taking off after Inuyasha at top speed, leaving Kagome to grab Shippo and catch up on Kirara. It would to be difficult for the large cat to maneuver in the forest, so Miroku and Inuyasha raced ahead.

 

Sango stirred, groaning. Her head throbbed dully and her entire body felt leaden. It was too difficult to move, so she tried to open her eyes, only to squeeze them quickly shut again; everything was painfully bright and it felt as if the world were spinning wildly around her.

When she was finally able to quash the sensation that her stomach had leapt into her throat, she managed to wonder what had happened. The last thing she remembered was… what was the last thing she remembered? Everything was so hazy it hurt to think. She had no memory of falling asleep or being knocked out in battle, nor could she remember how she came to be here.

She vaguely recalled having a conversation with Miroku earlier in the day, and later eating dinner with her friends. And then… Then what?

Pain lanced through her head and settled, pulsing, behind her eyes. She lay still for a long time, focusing on that pain and willing it to subside; her heart thudded sluggishly in her chest.

She lay still for a while, drifting in and out of consciousness, waiting for something to happen. When she did not move and tried not to think too hard, it did not hurt so much. She had thought she was alone, possibly in a dungeon cell of some sort, but a sudden noise startled her.

Something was moving, giving off a soft, almost slithering sound. Sango's eyes shot open, but the darkness above her, that might have been an earthen ceiling or something else altogether, refused to focus. The pain behind her eyes returned with a throb.

"Sleep, my slayer," whispered an androgynous voice from somewhere nearby. She tried to turn to see who, or what, had spoken, but her body refused to obey her. The command to sleep was alluring; Sango struggled to stay awake and found she could not. As she lost consciousness, she thought she heard the voice add, "It's not yet time for you to wake…"

 

Sango and the headman couldn't have gotten far in the few minutes since they had left the village, could they? Miroku did not think so, especially because even he had been able to hear Sango's shout. The only question, then, was where they had gone.

In the dark and unfamiliar landscape, Miroku might have walked right by and never noticed a thing out of the ordinary. With that in mind he stuck close to Inuyasha, trusting the hanyou's nose to lead them as they raced through the forest.

For a few moments they followed a well-beaten path, until Inuyasha suddenly veered off into the thick undergrowth. Miroku skidded and almost fell at the sudden change in direction, but he managed to keep his feet beneath him and moving. Leaves and branches slapped against them, as if feebly trying to keep them out, for a long way until the thick vegetation suddenly cleared. Miroku came to a halt, sliding a few feet on damp grass and nearly colliding with Inuyasha. After taking a moment to catch his breath, he peered cautiously around the clearing.

There was no sign of Sango or the headman, but Inuyasha headed immediately to the center of the open space.

"Her scent ends here," the hanyou explained gruffly, almost to himself, as he began pulling vegetation away. "No, it goes underground." Miroku followed and helped clear the area, revealing a cunningly camouflaged trap door by the time Kagome and the others caught up.

"What happened to Sango?" Kagome asked quietly as she came closer, Shippo on one shoulder and Kirara, still in her formidable transformed state, following close on her heels. Suddenly, her expression darkened. As if it were just dawning on her: "I can sense a demon…!"

Focusing his energy, Miroku felt it too. It was a real struggle to find it; this thing was as sneaky and slippery as any foe he had ever faced.

"But… I can't tell where it is… You don't think it's underground, do you, Miroku?"

That was where Inuyasha said Sango was. If he had to guess, a demon was probably what had happened to her... the headman had led her right into a trap. While she could hold her own against several human men in a fight; he had to stop and remind himself that she had left the village without her armor or any of her weapons. Furiously, he wondered what had gotten into her as he considered Kagome's question. "It is possible, Kagome."

"Should we –"

Suddenly, Inuyasha jerked his head up. His teeth curled back almost into a snarl. "What do you want?"

Several of the headman's guards had followed them on their wild chase through the village and forest and were now approaching with weapons at the ready. Not a one of them spoke a word in response to Inuyasha's question. All four of them bore identical expressions: cold, almost blank.

Definitely not a good sign, Miroku decided. The last thing they needed right now was a fight with humans. Armed humans at that, who, by the look of it, had no qualms about killing them. They needed to find Sango as quickly as possible. And this… this was meant to waste time.

"Miroku –"

Kagome's suddenly commanding tone took him by surprise. He stared at her incredulously, momentarily forgetting the armed guards that were threatening them. Usually it was Inuyasha being overbearing and giving commands. Catching Inuyasha's look, he grinned rather lecherously; he could get used to taking orders from a lovely lady like Kagome rather than a certain irate hanyou.

"Take Kirara and go get Sango. We'll hold off the guards."

Both monk and hanyou blinked a few times before what she had said really began to sink in.

"Wait a second," Inuyasha protested. "You're sending _him _after Sango? Shouldn't we go get her, and let him talk these idiots out of whatever they think they're doing?" His eyes narrowed dangerously, focusing on Kagome and then darting to Miroku for a moment before returning to the girl. "You didn't even bring your weapon. What the hell good are you gonna be against these guys?"

"Well it's not like we're going to _kill _them, anyway!"

Miroku caught a sidelong glance from Kagome; it was a rather sly look that told him this was exactly what she had intended. She wanted to distract Inuyasha. She wanted Miroku to go save Sango. It was a mystery as to exactly why she was so determined for things to work out that way, but he was not about to give up his chance to earn a little admiration from Sango rather than the scorn he was usually faced with. Besides, fear and anger aside, if she were bound or unconscious, there was always the chance that he could cop a feel unmolested. A completely innocent feel. While he was busy rescuing her, of course.

He sighed. Even he knew this was no time for that type of thought; he did not even really understand why it had popped into his head so suddenly. Especially since he'd so recently set his mind to being good for a change. No, he would take advantage of the opportunity Kagome had provided, and try very hard not to take advantage of any vulnerability on Sango's part.

That decided, Miroku leapt onto Kirara's back and the two plunged into the opening, the sound of Inuyasha arguing with Kagome fading slowly into the background as they descended. The others made no attempt to follow. It would seem that Kagome's methods of subduing the hanyou were becoming more effective.

The hole, which opened up on what turned out to be a large tunnel that headed straight into the ground, had been deliberately covered by a camouflaged trap door and was wide enough that Kirara could descend while still transformed. That would certainly make getting back out easier if they ended up having to backtrack. Miroku found himself silently thanking Kagome for letting him go after Sango alone. Well, almost alone. At least Kirara was every bit as concerned for Sango as he was.

Miroku had a very bad feeling about this, a sick sensation in the pit of his stomach that had been eating away at him since they first heard Sango's scream back at the village, and hated himself for not following when he had the chance. If only he had been more willing to risk her ire, or to risk breaking his own heart, or had not been foolishly trying to win her trust by doing everything he thought she wanted, then he might have managed to prevent whatever was happening to her now. And considering the fact that he could not seem to curb his lecherous thoughts anyway, perhaps his plan of good behavior hadn't been such a good idea, after all.

Realizing that thinking like that would do him no good, he pushed the thoughts aside and focused on the task ahead of him. There would be time for reflection later.

The descent was long; the tunnel was narrow at first, barely big enough to accommodate the two of them, but went deeper and grew far wider than most dens and even wells, though the bottom was dry. From the bottom a narrow, claustrophobic tunnel ran off into the darkness, heading back in the direction of the village.

Miroku slipped from Kirara's back and peered into the darkness. It seemed almost like a cave, but with smooth walls that did not look to have been naturally created. Something had made this tunnel, and very likely for just this sort of purpose. Yet they had heard no tales of women consistently being taken by some demon in the forest, just the dark aura surrounding the village. It was puzzling.

He moved cautiously, walking next to Kirara rather than riding her, expecting an ambush with every step further into the darkness. His grip on his staff tightened nervously. He did not like the close quarters of the tunnel, should they end up in a fight.

For a long time they wandered in darkness, the only light coming from Kirara's faint glow. As the tunnel wound its way through the earth, Miroku began to wonder if they would find themselves under the village, and still there was no sign of reaching an end.

After what seemed like an eternity, the cramped tunnel widened slightly. He could see the faint glow where it opened up into a larger cavern up ahead. Since there was nowhere else to go, they headed straight toward that dimly lit opening.

Miroku paused, taking in the scene that presented itself. Kirara snarled angrily.

Torches lined the wall, giving off just enough light to see by, but clouding the air with smoke. He could not see a demon anywhere, but he could make out Sango's form, lying supine on a pallet against the far wall. She lay frighteningly still, and, even more upsetting, was wearing nothing.

He did not want to think of reasons why this might be the case, but his head filled with images of some faceless demon having its way with Sango. Even worse were the visions in which she was not only at the demon's mercy, but _liked _it. He forced all such idiotic notions away, with great effort deciding that he would come to conclusions later, after Sango told him what had happened. That hard-won resolution did nothing to stop the ideas from lurking at the edges of his thoughts.

The air was thick with miasma. It gave everything a faintly rosy hue and a subtle sweet smell, and seemed to be coming from the torches. Perhaps it was a sort of incense. Miroku could not be sure, but he clamped the fabric of one sleeve over his nose and mouth before proceeding further. Cautiously removing the covering, he took an experimental breath of the stuff.

While it at first appeared to be a cloud of incense smoke, the effect was instantaneous. His vision swam alarmingly and he felt as if his body was consumed by lust. Swaying on his feet and feeling dangerously lightheaded, he held the fabric over his nose and mouth again; it helped a bit.

What in all hells _was _this stuff? He had never heard of anything like it.

He took a few deep breaths through the protective fabric, hoping to steady himself. "Stay back, Kirara," he managed. "I will fetch Sango and bring her back here." The demon cat looked at him, a deep rumbling emanating from her chest. The sound told him that she trusted him to rescue her mistress, if just barely.

As he made his way into the lair, he wished he had had both time and the presence of mind to bring Sango's gear, especially her protective gas mask. As he wondered how long she might have been breathing the stuff, it occurred to him to wonder if there would be any long-term effects. Pushing those thoughts aside for now – he would worry about that later, once he knew she was safe – and made his way forward, one hand keeping the fabric protectively over his face and the other clutching his staff.

"Sango."

The woman on the pallet did not move, and gave no sign that she was even aware of his presence. He repeated the call once more, to no avail. Glancing warily about for any sign of the creature - and he was by now certain it could not be a human - that was responsible for this, and assuring himself that they were safe for now, he made his way to her side.

"Sango," he said, crouching so he could whisper close to her ear. Finally, she opened her eyes. Something in those eyes was not quite right…

She looked confused for a moment, then grabbed for him. The sudden movement caught him off guard as she simultaneously moved to shove his arm away from his face and pull him toward her. He wobbled off balance for a moment before her strength caused him to topple over on top of her; he fell out of his crouch to his knees, his butt awkwardly in the air, and his face smashed against Sango's chest.

Halfheartedly, he wondered: since when was Sango the one doing the grabbing? He grunted in annoyance at the rather embarrassing nature of his current position.

Slamming his hands down on the straw pallet on either side of her, he pushed away as hard as he could. It was no use. Sometimes, he had to admit, her strength was truly an inconvenience. Particularly when he was fighting against her.

"Sango, snap out of it," he wheezed. He did not want to breathe in any more of that miasma, but she was making things very difficult.

"Mm, Houshi-sama," she murmured, her breath oddly hot. She squirmed, trying to wriggle her way under him without letting him go.

"Sango, what's gotten into you?" Something very obviously had gotten into her; the demon slayer he knew would never be this forthcoming, no matter how enticing that thought might be. He tried to worm his way out of her grip, but ended up pinned against her even more firmly and cursing her strength yet again. The situation was quickly becoming ridiculous.

Her hands slid along his back, slipping gently around to cup his face, drawing him up. He moved willingly, hoping to somehow gain control of the situation. Sango had other ideas.

The look in her eyes caught him, drew him in. She looked so beautiful, so…

Eyes closed, he whispered her name and leaned in to close the distance between them. He'd waited a long time to kiss Sango…

 

"What's taking him so damn long?" Inuyasha groused, impatiently throwing three of the village guards off him. He hoped at least one of them hit the fourth one, who had managed to slip away from him.

Kagome let out an "eep!" and dodged to the side as one of the unlucky men landed where she had been standing a moment before. She frowned in annoyance. "He's only been gone a few minutes, you know. He might not even have found her yet."

"Keh. That's why you shoulda let me do it. I'd have sniffed her out by now and we'd be done with this already."

Kagome said nothing. She did not want to let on, but she was worried. She put on a brave face and boundless optimism to keep Inuyasha at bay, but it really had been a while since Miroku and Kirara went after Sango. She hoped that everything was all right.


	5. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Kirara growled a warning. Miroku had barely registered the cat demon's agitation before he found himself suddenly hauled bodily away from Sango, Kirara's teeth clamped firmly into the fabric of his robes. He hadn't even heard Kirara follow him; he'd been too focused on Sango.

Struggling to clear his mind, very much aware that he needed to concentrate, he sensed demonic aura on her breath. Did the miasma have something to do with it? He hoped that the answer was that simple.

Moving quickly while he was momentarily free of Sango's grasp, he withdrew one of the sacred sutras that he always carried and, kneeling beside her, pressed it to her forehead. The paper began to smolder immediately, but did not burst into flames and seemed unable to fully purify whatever was affecting the demon slayer.

 

Sango felt vaguely as if she were on fire.

She took in a deep, gasping breath and lurched upright, shoving Miroku aside as she gagged on the smoky miasma that surrounded them. Her stomach heaved and she vomited up what was left of her dinner. When she finished, she wobbled precariously and fell over practically on top of him, gasping for breath; he had been crouching beside her and stumbled under her weight, but managed not to fall.

She was terrified at the sudden sensation of awareness, having no real idea of how she had come to be in this place. Each lungful of the strange miasma only increased her panic. Her eyes went wide at the sudden realization of her nudity and she pulled away from Miroku, attempting to cover herself as best she could. She searched frantically for some sort of explanation and found none.

Lacking an easy explanation, she got angry. Fury fueled by fear and anxiety bubbled up within her, and she turned that fierce, irrational anger toward the nearest target, which happened to be Miroku.

"What are you doing?" Her voice was shrill and raw; she sounded terrified even to herself. She wanted to slap him for some transgression, _any_ transgression, but her limbs felt rubbery and she couldn't quite manage to move that much. Not that she wanted him to know that.

Miroku did not rile at her foul temper. It almost seemed that he had expected it. "I saw you leave the village with the headman," he explained. His eyes were soft; her anger was already losing its edge in the face of his obvious concern. "We… heard you scream and came after you. Kagome and Inuyasha are outside, taking care of the guards."

"I - I see."

"Here." He shifted away from her, removing the kesa from his robes and offering it to her so that she could cover herself. She squinted suspiciously. Could this really be the Miroku she knew, passing up a chance to see her unclothed? After all, it was unlike him not to have grabbed her or made some sort of perverted comment yet, even when he was offering her a kindness. Deciding not to tempt fate, she accepted the offering, wrapping the thick fabric around herself and securing it as best she could. It was not ideal, but it would have to do until they could get back to the inn for her clothes.

He extended a hand; she accepted and allowed him to help her to her feet. She was unsteady and feared for a moment that she might be sick again. She took a deep breath, mindful of the miasma, though it seemed to have thinned some after Miroku applied to the ofuda to her forehead.

Sheepishly, she peeled the paper from her skin, only to have the effects return full force. Her whole body felt hot, feverish, sensitized to an incredible degree. The feel of Miroku's kesa against her breasts was nearly unbearable. She wondered briefly how Miroku and Kirara were able to stand it.

Her mind was reeling, torn too many different ways. She wanted badly for Miroku to assuage the need that was burning between her legs and at the same time she was terrified of what would happen if she let him near her. Her body fairly ached with wanting him... but for their first time together to be here, like this? She couldn't stand the thought.

That damn demon. She had never felt such an intense physical attraction to anyone before. She had felt moments of longing, even of lust, but this was different - forced, almost painful. As if something in her head was screaming _GIVE IN_ over and over again at a deafening pitch.

She wanted to hunt down the thing that had done this to her, and was fearful because it had so easily rendered her helpless. She wanted the fear and shame to go away, even knowing that she could not accept help; she had to redeem herself. She was a demon slayer. Nothing less would do.

"Sango." Miroku's voice and a warm, steady hand at her shoulder brought her back to reality. "Let's get you out of here."

She didn't think her face could get any redder. She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out.

She was spared any further embarrassment when a resounding crash echoed through the cavern. The demon returning, perhaps? She struggled with her fuzzy memory and found that she could not remember what, exactly, the demon was. She knew it had to be a demon, because there was no way that the thing that had grabbed her could possibly be human. But everything had gone black when she had hit the bottom of the tunnel, and she had not woken up until Miroku arrived.

From a dark corner of the room, a woman approached. At least it looked like a woman on the outside. It had to be the demon that was responsible for all this, and yet – a woman?

"The villagers never mentioned anything like _you_ when they told us about a demonic presence," Miroku murmured. He sounded almost… appreciative. Sango shook with rage; how could he look at the creature like that, knowing it was behind all this?

The demon's lips curled into a smile. "Oh I'm sure they would have, if they weren't all merely my puppets."

Sango narrowed her eyes. This was too much to bear. It was bad enough to be captured by some strange demon, but even worse to have Miroku see her naked, and then have to fight without her armor or her weapons. She slipped into a defensive stance, wishing that she had even just one of her weapons. But she could no longer simply stand and watch. She had to do something, whether or not she had weapons. "Demon! I'll kill you!"

The demon chuckled. "Abide, slayer." At the demon's command, there was suddenly pain; if she had felt feverish before, she felt as if her very blood was ablaze now. She was forcefully slammed against the wall by something she could not see. The air knocked from her lungs, Sango gasped for breath.

"You're controlling her too, then." Miroku sounded enviably calm. Sango gritted her teeth, unable to do more than that.

"She fought me," the demon woman grinned even wider, "But it was easy enough to subdue her again. Humans are such weak-willed creatures…"

"Why her?" Miroku frowned; the demon laughed. Sango fairly bristled with anger as she fought against the demon's control. Its will compelled her to remain still, but she would be damned before she would give up without a fight.

"Oh, it's not her I wanted. It's _you_, monk. Your spiritual power will make a good meal and good practice for taking that other holy one that travels with you." That grin was getting steadily wider and wider. "I just need an opening, monk. Just a small lapse in your concentration. You almost gave me that already."

Miroku said nothing. Sango frowned, struggling to remember. Indeed, up until the moment Miroku had used the ofuda on her, she could not recall very much at all of what had happened that evening. For some reason, she had the distinct impression that he had tried to kiss her. But there were only blurry memories and vague sensations to back that up.

Taking advantage of his pause to continue, the demon added, "The other one, that priestess is more powerful, but much easier to distract." It smiled, lips curling with relish.

"You're using _that_ to distract people, so you can control them?" Sango managed, comprehension dawning. No wonder Inuyasha and Kagome had been all over each other lately.

If she was surprised that Sango had managed to break her hold enough to speak, the demon woman did not show it; instead, she laughed again. "There are few things that distract humans better than 'that,' slayer. And in my many years, I believe I've perfected the art of dist –"

She was interrupted by the impact from Miroku's staff; the force of the blow smashed half her face in and left the air sizzling with energy.

"Bastard monk!" The words were snarled, lacking the crystalline beauty of the demon's previous speech. For just a moment in the aftermath of Miroku's attack, the demon's concentration - and her appearance - wavered. Underneath the beautiful woman was a wizened old creature, so covered with wrinkles that it almost appeared to be made up entirely of vines; it was small wonder that this demon was so good at hiding itself and using trickery to get what it wanted.

Sango's legs gave way beneath her as Miroku spun and landed another hit with his staff. It felt as if she were a puppet whose strings had just been cut. She lolled on the floor, barely able to move, for what seemed like an eternity, gradually becoming aware that some of the oppressiveness of the demon's command for stillness was beginning to lift.

She was fairly certain that Miroku's attacks were distracting the demon enough that it had lost its hold on her, but she forced herself to remain still, waiting for a chance to attack it, watching as best as she could.

No opportunities were forthcoming, and without her armor, weapons, or arsenal of poisons, she was not sure how best to approach this thing. She frowned. It was beyond frustrating to be without even the most basic of her tools.

She watched as the demon howled in anger and lost its human shape for good. It twisted and changed, from a beautiful woman into a tortured looking _thing_ made up of a writhing mass of vines. Where there had once been a face there was now only a grotesque collection of knots in the wood. Ropelike vines lashed out from what had been fingertips moments before.

Miroku leapt out of the way, blocking a few of the vines with his staff, searching for an opening that would enable him to strike. There was none. The demon simply had too many appendages, and the close quarters meant that he could not use the wind tunnel without potentially bringing the entire cave down around them.

Sango frowned. She wanted to help but knew it would be foolhardy to attack this thing with no armor or weapons to hand. She half expected the full force of its will to come crashing down upon her again any second. It did not.

The sound of the demon fruitlessly attacking Miroku assured her that it was still at least partially distracted. It assumed she was weak and still fully under its control. A sudden thud followed by a grunt from Miroku and the rush of surging vines drew her attention.

Sango's heart stopped as she watched Miroku go down under the force of at least half a dozen of the vines, the staff skittering from his grip as he hit the ground hard. She had to do something _now_ or the monk could very well die.

The staff was her only choice. It had slid in her direction when Miroku lost his grip on it, and the demon seemed to still be focusing on the monk. It seemed to have decided that he was the bigger threat. Maybe he was. Sango had no holy powers with which to imbue the weapon, but she did have the strength of years of training. It would have to be enough.

In the instant she rose to run for the staff, the demon's head shot up, its hollow eyes staring straight at her. She could feel the command to remain still and fought it. Her limbs went leaden despite her efforts at resistance and she stumbled, knowing she would fall. The demon would kill Miroku, and then come after her. She was certain, and felt the crushing weight of failure settle more surely on her shoulders.

None of them had counted on Kirara.

The firecat gave no howl or roar, no sound of warning. She simply flew out of the darkness and clamped her jaws hard into the demon's wooden flesh.

The command lifted.

Sango stumbled, fell, and sprawled gracelessly on the ground. Her hands, flung wide as she fell, had done nothing to cushion the landing, but she took a deep breath and clenched her fist around the staff.

Her heart pounded in her chest.

Kirara struggled to maintain a grip on the demon as surely as it struggled to dislodge her. It shook and writhed, trying to throw the firecat loose as her teeth chipped away at the woody vines that made up its body.

Sango rolled into a crouch, eying the demon for any sign of a weakness. She knew that she would have only a few moments in which to strike, and each blow had to count. She thought she would have time for one, two at most.

She prayed silently for Kirara to keep the demon occupied for a few more seconds, noting out of the corner of one eye that Miroku had managed to free one arm. Then something else caught her eye. Roots. Slipping and slithering along the ground, from the thing's ankles and heading off into the darkness. If it truly was a plant demon, as it appeared to be, severing the roots should kill it.

The demon howled and shook Kirara free. The acrid smell of smoke filled the air, and Sango saw bits of ofuda paper clinging to the demon, burning. Miroku must have managed to free himself enough to reach his sacred scrolls, but Sango did not chance a look. Her attention was focused on the demon.

Sango seized her chance while the demon was distracted. She leapt to her feet and attacked.

The staff was an unfamiliar weapon; she hoped that strength alone would be enough.

The sharpened metal staff sliced through the wooden lifelines with ease, and she swung it around one more time to smash it into the demon's body with all the force she could muster. The blow landed with the satisfying crunch of old, rotten wood, and the demon exploded outward.

Bits of paper and ash drifted down around them almost like snow. Miroku must have thrown more ofuda while she was busy with her own attack. She would have smiled in gratitude if she had not been preoccupied with the humiliation the demon had forced her to endure. Rage and shame still burned in her blood just as surely as the demon's strange miasma had set her body afire with need. She was beginning to wonder if the unpleasant sensations and emotions would ever fade. Killing it certainly had done little to improve her mood. Her moment of revenge seemed empty, hollow…

"We should go back," Miroku said, the soft sound of his voice drawing her back to the present.

She shook her head, gesturing toward the gnarled roots on the ground. "We have to make sure we got all of it. It was a plant demon. If we leave any part of the root system alive, it'll just regenerate."

They followed the roots into the darkness for a short distance. Sango was conscious that Miroku walked close beside her on one side, and every so often Kirara would butt up against her from the other. She was not sure whether to feel loved that they both wanted to protect her, or slighted because they thought she could not defend herself. Ruefully, she realized that she had already failed to defend herself once this night. It was probably for the best to have two watchful pairs of eyes guarding her back.

Trying to focus on the task at hand rather than her failures, Sango scanned the darkness as she walked, looking for signs of the demon's true body. She was certain they would find it somewhere in this underground lair, but did not see it until she had almost tripped over it. A stump, the living demon plant long since cut away, save for a small protruding branch that bore a few limp leaves. It was too dark to make out more detail, but this had to be it.

Miroku peered curiously over her shoulder; Kirara tentatively sniffed toward the stump, recognizing it for what it was.

"We'll need to find someone to purify this," Sango explained, gesturing to the stump. "I'll bet these roots go on for miles under the ground, spreading out the demonic aura until it's practically unnoticeable." It was a dirty trick, but it certainly explained why no one in their group had sensed the demon's presence until it was too late.

Miroku took a deep, steadying breath and withdrew what had to be near the last of his ofuda. He paused for a long moment, deep in concentration, and whispered a prayer under his breath. When he placed the paper against the root, it began to slowly decay. In the silence that followed, they could hear a distant rumble spread through the earth as the roots disappeared and the ground resettled.

It felt almost as if a weight had lifted, to know the thing was dead and gone. And yet… Sango still felt angry, unfulfilled. And saddened, too, that she had made such a simple mistake and ended up putting everyone else at risk.

"Sango," Miroku said, interrupting her thoughts, "It's dead?"

She nodded, half wondering if he could see the movement in the dark.

"Then we should see if we can find a way out of here."

Sango nodded again, scanning the darkness for any sign of an exit. The tunnel only extended a short distance further into the dark before stopping at a dead end. After a short scuffle, Miroku managed to free one of the torches from its sconce; it let off a foul-smelling smoke, nothing at all like the rosy-pink miasma that had emanated from it earlier.

A quick investigation revealed no other obvious tunnels or exits. She was beginning to fear that they would have to go out the same way Miroku got in, but was reluctant to face Inuyasha and Kagome just yet.

"Is that a door?" Miroku asked suddenly, pointing into the gloom overhead.

"Maybe… It looks like there used to be a ladder here," Sango replied. "Kirara, take us up for a look."

She climbed onto the firecat's back, Miroku seated gingerly behind her, and they rose several feet into the air. Sure, enough, they could make out the outline of a trap door in the ceiling.

A careful, but forceful, push opened the door and sent wet, half-rotted tatami mats scattering, and they emerged into the night. As soon as Miroku and Sango had hauled themselves up through the opening, Kirara squeezed through after them. As the humans looked around, the firecat made herself at home in Sango's arms, cuddling up against the slayer to offer what comfort she could.

"This was… the headman's house," Sango murmured. She recognized the building, but it looked nothing like it had appeared earlier in the day. This was a ruin, not a well-appointed mansion. Which meant…

"There never was a wealthy headman in this village," Miroku said, frowning. "It was just a puppet all along, once the demon got control of the villagers." Sango thought she might be sick; they had been deceived so easily, from the very beginning. Even taking her into the forest had been a mere ruse to throw her friends off the trail…

She shivered suddenly, despite the warmth of Kirara in her arms.

"Come on, let's get back to the inn," Miroku continued. He sounded as weary as she felt. She could only nod her head weakly in response.


	6. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

"Why'd ya send Miroku anyway? I'd have killed it faster."

Kagome frowned angrily. "It was just a hunch, okay?" Her voice was shrill. By now, she was behind him, clinging to his arm, with Shippo peering over his shoulder.

"Keh, whatever." Inuyasha paused, sniffing the air. That was odd - he thought he smelled Sango and the monk, back in the direction of the village. It took him a moment longer to realize that the guards had stopped their attack, and were conversing with one another in hushed tones. "Hey, what gives?" he demanded.

All that time spent fighting them off while trying not to seriously injure them, and they just stopped out of nowhere?

Four pairs of eyes stared at him, revealing a mix of confusion and terror. Finally, one managed to squeak out, "I… We… Don't know. How did we get here? And wh-who-what are you?"

"Keh," he grumbled, breaking out of Kagome's grasp. "You talk to 'em, wench."

"Wench?" she shrieked, outraged.

"I'm going after the monk. They're back at the village, somehow."

Kagome frowned. "You're just going to leave me here?"

Inuyasha shrugged. "If you hurry up, you can come with me. These idiots don't know what's going on."

Kagome glanced uncertainly toward the men who, until a few moments before, had been attacking them. Now the men looked nothing short of baffled.

Comprehension dawned. "They must have been possessed!" She paused, as if deep in thought. The guards were by now staring at her with unabashed curiosity. "I can't sense the demonic aura anymore. Sango and Miroku must've killed the demon." She turned back to the guards, who eyed her warily. "Come back to the village with us," she urged, "We have a lot of things to explain to you." As Inuyasha hauled her onto his back for the run to the village, the guards did not hear her add, "I hope."

 

Sango had just cinched the belt to close her kosode when Inuyasha, Kagome, and Shippo burst into the room she was to share with Kagome at the inn. Miroku returned, the befuddled innkeeper in tow, a few seconds later and just in time to save Sango from facing their questions alone.

"Sango!" Kagome and Shippo cried at the same time; the priestess fairly flew toward the slayer, stopping just short of flinging her arms around the slayer in a hug her eyes scanning her friend's form for any sort of immediately visible injury. Finding none, relief spread across her face. Shippo, who had been perched on Kagome's shoulder, launched himself at Sango and crashed headfirst into her chest, his arms spread wide in a hug.

Sango smiled. It only felt a little forced. The last of her nausea and shakiness seemed to be fading. Her hands came up of their own accord, fingers sliding through Shippo's fur before the young fox demon clambered up onto her shoulder. She was vaguely aware of Kirara, having stirred from the nap she had settled into the moment they returned to the inn, coming to wind her way around Sango's ankles.

"You're all right," Kagome breathed, while Inuyasha harrumphed.

"Yes, it would seem we escaped intact," Miroku added. The rings on his staff chimed as he leaned it against the nearest wall. Sango noticed that several village men had followed Inuyasha and Kagome, though they refrained from entering the room; she thought she recognized them as the headman's guards, but did not inquire about it.

"So… that thing… what was it?" Shippo asked.

"Who cares, as long as it's dead now?" Inuyasha grouched.

Miroku quirked a brow at Sango; she sighed, understanding the implicit cue. "It was a plant demon…" she began, before launching into a heavily edited recounting of the events leading up to her rescue, or at least as much as she was able to remember. Miroku supplied bits and pieces of information where her memory was still fuzzy, but for the most part he let her do the telling.

"From what it told us, its ultimate goal was to kill Kagome and somehow obtain her power," Sango concluded. "But it's obviously been controlling the villagers for some time."

The innkeeper, a man who might otherwise have been a village elder, had disappeared part of the way through Sango's explanation with a rather ill look on his face. He returned now, either having got over his reaction to the situation or having confirmed that these strange travelers had, in fact, paid for their keep.

Sango paid little heed to his entrance, or the way the former guards slipped away, trying instead to focus on finishing up the story and answering her friends' questions without letting on how upset she was by the whole thing.

But in the silence after the tale was told, the innkeeper piped up. "All the members of this village owe you an enormous debt of gratitude," he said, bowing deferentially. "If there is anything you desire, simply ask and I will see what can be done."

That caught Sango's attention. "What about a bath? Is there a spring or bath house nearby?" She hated to admit it, but she could still feel the lingering residue of that demonic miasma all over her. It was enough to make her skin crawl. She could think of nothing that sounded more pleasant than a long, hot bath.

"I thought you might make such a request, so I took the liberty of asking my wife to ready the bath house for you," the innkeeper responded, looking rather pleased with himself. Sango doubted that this was the real reason for his earlier departure, but kept her suspicions to herself. "It should be ready soon, should you decide to make use of it."

Sango glanced at Kagome and saw the other girl nod. "We'll definitely take you up on that," the priestess said, ignoring the annoyed look Inuyasha was giving her. "Just let me grab my things."

She dug through her enormous backpack for a long time before finally reemerging, triumphantly grasping a couple of bottles in each hand. Sango knew from prior experience that these held Kagome's bathing supplies, lovely scented soaps and strange poultices that she used to clean her hair.

Signaling that they were now ready, Kagome and Sango followed the innkeeper from the room. The promise of warm water and quietude was enough to make Sango want to melt, if only Kagome did not feel too inclined to pry. She was not sure she could handle too many questions from the other girl, at least not yet.

All she wanted right now was to take a bath and go to sleep, and pretend this had never happened.

 

Miroku smirked as he watched the ladies head down the hallway. When they were out of sight and, presumably, also out of earshot, he asked, "Do you think we ought to follow them, just to make sure everything is safe?"

The hanyou's lips curled back into what might have been a snarl. "Haven't you had enough, monk?" he growled through clenched teeth. Miroku thought that Inuyasha was perhaps resisting the urge to inflict physical damage on him, and rather suspected he knew why.

"I don't know what you're talking about." It wouldn't do to simply admit to the events that had occurred in the demon's lair; he had Sango's honor and dignity to consider, after all. She had not left the more questionable parts out of her retelling without reason.

And besides, he had done nothing untoward while rescuing Sango from the demon. For once in his life and despite the most alluring temptation imaginable, he had managed to adhere firmly to his idiotic goal and keep his hands to himself. Surely that deserved some sort of reward. Unfortunately, none seemed to be forthcoming. He was instead met with even more intense scrutiny.

"Last chance, monk. Fess up. What did you do to Sango back there?"

"Huh?" Miroku gave a look of pure innocence; the expression was not entirely feigned.

Inuyasha looked away and muttered something quietly. He seemed uncomfortable with the topic at hand, but his concern for Sango's well being outweighed that discomfort; it helped dispel Miroku's outrage at being put in the position of perpetrator of some crime against Sango.

"Inuyasha, my hearing is not as acute as yours. If you want me to answer you, you'll have to ask so that I can hear you," he prodded. If he had to endure this humiliation, then so would Inuyasha. He saw no reason to go easy on Inuyasha just because the hanyou was squeamish when it came to talking about sex, not when he was about to be blamed for something he had not – no matter how much he had wanted to – done.

"You better not have mated with her," came the response, finally. Inuyasha's eyes were narrowed, his expression angry.

"What makes you think I _'mated'_ with her?" That was such an unsavory term. Absently, he resolved to have a talk with Inuyasha about that later.

"I can smell it on you, idiot," the hanyou grumbled. "My nose is better than yours, remember?"

Miroku's shoulders slumped. He knew he really ought to just confess and get this over with. "Since she did not bring it up, I can only assume that she did not wish for me to mention it to anyone until she was ready to talk about it."

"If you know what's good for you, you'll tell me." He should have expected this from Inuyasha; if the hanyou could not get to the bottom of something through a feeble attempt at diplomacy or understanding, he invariably resorted to threats of force. His dealings with Shippo were proof enough of that nearly every day. Right now he was leaning forward threateningly, his fangs just visible.

Miroku gave it one last try. "These things are not appropriate –"

"Spill it, monk, before I kick your ass and ask Sango myself."

"Now, now. There's no need for violence." He made a placating gesture with his hands, but the hanyou did not seem inclined to back down. Miroku frowned. Did all his friends have so little faith in him?

Sighing, he decided it would be best to simply admit what had happened. He cast a glance in Shippo's direction, but the fox kit was curled up with Kirara, and appeared to be sound asleep. Miroku hoped he was – and that for once Inuyasha would show some discretion – because he had no desire for word of this to get around to Kagome until Sango was ready to tell her.

"Sango was not just the demon's prisoner. It was controlling her somehow," he explained as tersely as possible. "Its goal was to entice me into making love with Sango, in the hopes that thus distracted I would make an easy target."

Inuyasha quirked a brow. "All that just to get at _you_?"

Miroku frowned. "I gathered that Kagome was the ultimate target. Sango and I were merely steps toward that goal."

Inuyasha growled under his breath, so quietly that Miroku almost didn't hear. Ignoring the hanyou's agitation, Miroku continued, "Luckily we were able to defeat the thing, whatever it was, before it had a chance to go after Kagome."

None of this seemed to do much to improve the hanyou's mood. Miroku decided that it might be wiser to avoid telling Inuyasha that the demon had admitted to using the same tactic on others - presumably including Inuyasha and Kagome - in the hopes of devouring them and adding their power to its own. While Miroku himself had little experience in the way of close, intimate relationships, preferring instead to indulge in physical intimacy as quickly as possible and leave as soon as it was convenient to do so, he knew that Inuyasha and Kagome's trust in each other was likely running thin due to the shift from a purely emotional bond to a physical one; he had no wish to further jeopardize their relationship and happiness based on a demon's hearsay. After all, he had no way to verify any of the things it had told him.

He realized an instant too late that the hanyou was already gone, undoubtedly headed back to the demon's lair to check things out for himself. Miroku shook his head, and wondered if Inuyasha would ever truly learn to trust his friends.

He knew he should return to his room, since they had paid enough coin for two, but instead made his way back to the girls' room, to join Shippo and Kirara in waiting for Sango and Kagome to return.

 

The bathhouse turned out to be located in a separate building from the inn, and appeared to be more of a common village bathhouse than one owned specifically by the innkeeper. It did not matter much to Sango, as long as she could finally get clean, and in relative privacy.

The innkeeper handed them over to his wife, a kind looking woman who was younger than Sango had expected, just outside the bathhouse; steam emanated invitingly from the building, and sweat was visible on the young woman's face. She had obviously been working hard to make sure their guests would be comfortable.

There was no sign of the servants from earlier; Sango wondered idly what would become of the girls now that the demon's spell was broken. The village was likely to be in turmoil for some time, especially if the demon had been in control for as long as she suspected.

The innkeeper's wife showed them into the bathhouse after exchanging a few pleasantries with her husband and the girls, explaining that they were to make themselves at home and to take as long as they wished.

Sango blushed and nodded, feeling a bit awkward at the idea of being waited on hand and foot. By now, Kagome seemed to take such treatment in stride. In fact, Sango guessed that simple hospitality was probably more preferable for her friend than the awe and strict formality usually reserved for priestesses.

Once the innkeeper's wife had retreated outside, the girls undressed. Neither said a word, but Sango could feel Kagome's eyes on her, searching for injuries the slayer might have tried to disguise or hide. Thankfully, there were none.

The bathhouse contained two "rooms" - one for men and one for women - that were separated by a large, thick screen. The room was spacious for a bathhouse and the air was filled with clean steam.

The girls sank gratefully into the water, glad to have a chance to bathe in peace and quiet after the ordeals of the day.

For a long time, Sango was content to soak in silence. She felt much better with the warm water around her. The memories of the demon's lair were fading further and further, and for the moment she was glad to let them go. She resolved to face those memories when she had some time to herself. Until then, she would answer questions if asked, but had no wish to over think things.

Yes, a bath was just what she had needed, after all that had happened.

"Sango?" She perked up at the sound of her name.

"Yes, Kagome?"

"Uh, I hate to ask, but… what happened to your clothes?"

Sango had hoped that the others would not notice that she had changed back into her own yukata. "Erm, well, the yukata from the inn was… torn in the fight with the demon." She mentally cursed herself for being such a damnably bad liar; luckily, Kagome seemed to believe her.

"Oh," Kagome said quietly. "You weren't hurt, were you?"

Sango sighed, leaning back against the edge of the bath. "No, just my pride." She sighed again, wondering why Kagome would ask such a thing when she could clearly see that there were no wounds on Sango's body. "I can't believe I let that thing capture me so easily."

Ever the optimist, Kagome chirped, "Well at least everything turned out okay in the end."

Sango murmured something noncommittal and slipped all the way under the water, enjoying the feel of clean warmth all around her. She was glad for the moment of peace, only surfacing reluctantly.

Kagome was watching her intently when she emerged; the priestess had _that look_ on her face. It was the look that said she was about to ask some "juicy" question about Miroku - where "juicy" was sure to mean awkward or embarrassing.

"So, uh, Sango…" she began. Sango tried not to cringe. "Did anything _interesting_ happen when Miroku rescued you? Something you may have forgotten to mention?"

"Kagome," she scolded. "He did nothing improper. He was a total gentleman." She allowed her eyes to narrow suspiciously and added, "For once." Kagome giggled. It seemed as good a time as any to satisfy her own curiosity. "By the way… what were you and Inuyasha doing that you couldn't come after me?"

The priestess looked guilty for an instant. "We – that is, the guards showed up right when we discovered the demon's lair. I thought it would be best to send Miroku and Kirara after you, while Inuyasha and I held off the guards."

Sango frowned. "I was kidnapped by a demon and you sent the lecher after me?" Her head felt like it was full of fuzz, but despite the difficulty of thinking she had the distinct impression that something worse than Miroku seeing her naked had nearly happened. Carnal images flashed before her eyes, but she did not know if they had actually occurred or if her imagination might be working overtime. Even though she had come to completely naked and with Miroku practically on top of her, she was certain that nothing untoward had occurred. She was _trying_ to be certain, at least.

Kagome was looking away; she seemed almost forlorn. "I'm sorry, Sango. I… I thought it would make you happy if Miroku was the one to rescue you."

Suddenly, Sango giggled. "I can't believe you would do something like that!"

"You're not… mad at me, or anything?"

Sango shook her head. "Not at all. It's just such a silly thing to do. I'd never have thought of that."

The tension in the air dissipated and Kagome joined her friend in helpless giggles. After a moment, Sango continued, "I can't believe Inuyasha listened to you, either. Usually he just goes rushing in, without waiting to see what's going on or listening to what anybody says…"

Kagome got that sad look on her face again. "He's probably really mad at me for that."

Sango shrugged. "What for? Like you said, everything turned out just fine. I mean, I know he's a little bit pig-headed sometimes…" She let it go at that and accepted the soapy sponge that Kagome was offering her, understanding the gesture as a sign that it was time to hurry up and head back.

She hurried to finish bathing, and then joined Kagome in drying off and getting dressed for the trip back to the inn. The building was silent, most of its residents already asleep. They made the short trip back to their room without incident, but something seemed to be bothering Kagome by the time they returned.

Sango slid the door to their room open and ushered Kagome inside in front of her.

"Where's Inuyasha?" the priestess asked, concern evident in her voice.

Miroku, who was inexplicably still in the room, shrugged. "He did not appear to believe Sango's - or my own - account of the demon's death. I presume he went to investigate on his own."

For her part, Sango was determined to ignore her friends and get some sleep. She was exhausted and knew it would not be long before dawn. And dawn meant they would be on the road before too much longer, barring some miraculous change of heart on Inuyasha's part.

She climbed into her futon, enjoying the warmth and comfort, and closed her eyes. As she lay listening to her friends quietly conversing, it was not long before she fell asleep.

 

"Miroku…" The word came out as a breathy whisper.

He moaned in response; she could feel his breath against her neck as he gasped for air. The warm air against her sensitive flesh made her shiver, despite the heat that rose between them.

Strong fingers probed against her, gently exploring the swell of her breasts, the curve of a hip, the warm, slippery wetness between her legs. She spread her legs wide, eager and inviting.

He did not hesitate.

She loved the feel of him between her legs, fever-hot and hard, more than ready for her; she squirmed, needing more intimate contact. Her legs wrapped around his waist, drawing her hips up hungrily to meet his own.

He shifted, slipped inside of her. She cried out, overwhelmed by passion, and –

Sango woke with a start. Her body was heated and she was drenched with her own sweat. She sat up, rubbing a hand across her forehead.

_D-did I just… dream about having sex with Miroku?_


	7. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

_D-did I just… dream about having sex with Miroku?_

Sango flopped back against her futon. It was still dark, but barely. It would be dawn soon. A tired, achy feeling washed over her. It was entirely too early to be awake, but she did not think she could get back to sleep. Not after that dream, anyway.

She glanced around her, trying to get her bearings. Nearby, Kagome slept peacefully beside Kirara and Shippo. She could just make out Miroku's form where he sat, a respectable distance away, leaning against one wall; the monk had stuck around even after she went to sleep.

She blushed anew to see the object of her dream so close by. Embarrassment turned to abject horror when she realized that not only had he been in the same room with her while she was dreaming of making love to him, but he was also _awake _and watching her with what looked like keen interest.

"Bad dream?" He spoke so quietly that she almost did not hear him.

She shook her head. "N-not exactly."

"Perhaps you would care to share? It sounded like you were having quite a dream…"

Mortified, she managed to get out, "It's none of your business!" before fleeing to the safety of the veranda.

Glad for the solitude, she sat near the edge of the porch and watched the sky grow lighter over the forest. It felt nice to have some time alone for once, though it was a bit reassuring to know that her friends were close by, after what had happened last night.

She let her thoughts drift aimlessly, plucking idly at the dew-wet weeds that grew near the veranda. She thought of home, wondering if her people would be ashamed of her now. She had completely failed to sense the demon, and had even become its prisoner and been used as bait against her friends.

A demon slayer, touted as the best of her village, but caught so easily…

Her brow furrowed in consternation. A nagging voice in her head, which sounded distinctly like her conscience, berated her angrily, buoyed by her growing sense of shame and weakness. She had led her friends into a trap… She should have known better. Should have done… _something_… to prevent this.

She was still sulking outside when Miroku and the others finally emerged.

Kagome, with a yawning Kirara cuddled in her arms and Shippo balanced precariously on one shoulder, glanced around worriedly. "Inuyasha hasn't come back yet?"

Almost before she had finished the question, the hanyou dropped out of a nearby tree with an emphatic, "Keh."

Sango was glad for the distraction, though she kept one eye on Miroku, who was inching closer to her every second. But rather than accosting Sango, he spoke to Inuyasha. "Did you find anything?"

The hanyou humphed and looked away. "There's a whole maze of tunnels under there, but I couldn't sniff anything out."

Kirara leapt from Kagome's arms as the priestess shrugged. "So? Miroku and Sango killed the demon last night. There's nothing to find."

Inuyasha glared. "It's too easy."

With a conspiratorial glint in his eye, Miroku leaned over and whispered, "He's just mad that he didn't get a chance to fight. Or anything else."

Sango stifled a giggle as Inuyasha grumbled. "I heard that, monk!"

 

They set off after a tense breakfast, during which Kagome had revealed that she needed to head back through the well as soon as possible for more of the tests she worried so much about.

Inuyasha carried Kagome on his back, while Sango, Miroku, and Shippo were left to ride Kirara.

They were several days' travel from Kaede's village and the well, so the plan was to travel as quickly as possible. Sango intended to make the journey, for the most part, silently. She did not relish the thought of talking with any of her comrades, least of all Miroku. They could all be so nosy when they wanted to be...

But with Kagome insisting on speed, it looked like she would be spending the next few days in close quarters with Miroku. The monk did not appear to be particularly displeased with the situation. She pried his hand off her hip for the second time and sighed.

The next few days were long and hard, spent covering as much ground as possible. For the most part, Sango was glad for the peace, but Miroku was slowly but surely beginning to drive her insane. She had hoped he might have the restraint to leave her in peace for even a few days, considering what had happened, but he was right back at it the moment they set out.

Sango spent her days fending off Miroku's attempts, which she suspected were intended more to lighten the mood than anything else, and her nights being plagued by nightmares that seemed to invade every dream. No more were her dreams filled with horrible visions of her family, dead and dying, or her brother. Now each night she returned to the demon's lair, to relive her own failure. A demon slayer, tricked and trapped so easily…

But the shame of her failure as a demon slayer was beginning to pale as she remembered more of that night. She did not think the dreams could be what really happened, as there tended to be a mix of random events leading up to her capture - some of them decidedly more embarrassing than others - but…

She had woken up naked. And Miroku had been there. And… She couldn't bear to think of it, and yet she could not help herself.

Two days later, she was still contemplating those dreams, between glares sent over her shoulder to keep Miroku in line, when Kagome called for a halt. Jerked out of her reverie, Sango realized that they were quite close to a hot spring, which was probably the reason for Kagome's sudden outburst. None of them had had a bath in days, and this was their last chance before they reached Kaede's village. Sango, having become accustomed to Kagome's insistence on stringent bathing habits, knew they were all in need of one.

Her rumbling stomach told her it was also high time they stopped for something to eat; to judge by the sun it was nearing midafternoon. It did not feel like they had been traveling that long. They had been covering so much ground so quickly that it was all starting to blur together, which was just fine with Sango.

At her mistress's command, Kirara landed in a small clearing not far from the spring. Dismounting, Sango stretched, joints popping and muscles complaining after spending so much time sitting still.

They did not even have a fire started and Inuyasha was already complaining.

"Oh, sure," he groused, "We have to get back to the well right away. Got tests to take, stuff to do! But we've got plenty of time for a stupid bath on the way!"

Kagome glared at the hanyou, fire in her eyes. "We hardly ever pass hot springs. And we can take a break, you know. It's past lunch time anyway."

"Yeah, Kagome's right. The rest of us need to eat, even if you don't," Shippo retorted, from the safety of Miroku's shoulder.

Miroku refused to let the opportunity for a break slip away. "Besides, it's about time we had something to eat. We can get lunch ready while the girls take their bath, to save time," he pointed out.

All the squabbling was beginning to make Sango nervous. She hated to see her friends fighting with each other.

Finally, Miroku put an end to the argument by physically hauling Inuyasha and Shippo off in the direction of the spring; obviously Inuyasha had been arguing simply for the sake of doing so, for he was easily led. As they disappeared from sight, Miroku shouted that it might be a good idea for the girls to make lunch - and as a bonus, they wouldn't have to deal with Inuyasha trying to eat it all.

His comment was met by a loud, but relatively good-natured, protest from the hanyou. Sango giggled to herself. Perhaps it had been his nose that had changed his tune.

Kagome did not seem so inclined to see the humor in the situation, choosing instead to begin preparing the fire and food in stony silence. Sango joined her, helping by gathering wood and keeping an eye on the boiling water, but the silence was growing increasingly awkward.

Finally, she could take it no longer and had to say something. "Kagome?"

Kagome looked up, "Hm?"

"Is something wrong?"

For a long time the young priestess did not answer, only stared glumly at the small fire.

"I told Inuyasha I needed seven days, but… that wasn't true," she said, pouting. "I just feel like I need some time to myself for a while. Things have… changed between us, Sango."

For a moment Sango feared that her friend was going to cry. "What do you mean, Kagome?"

"Well…" She paused for a long time, her face growing redder by the moment. "We used to go off together at night, to be… alone. To, uhm, you know…"

"I see," Sango said, feeling her own face grow heated. She had never really thought about discussing such things with Kagome, at least not earnestly. Sure, Kagome sometimes asked embarrassing questions about Miroku, but never anything that was meant to be taken seriously.

"But now we… don't. I – I don't know what's changed, but all of a sudden I just got… scared."

"Scared?"

Kagome nodded. "It happened after you were captured by that demon…" Sango had to wonder if Kagome really thought her friends were oblivious enough not to have noticed her frequent disappearances... and the sudden lack thereof.

Sango's response was a noncommittal shrug. She suspected that she knew why Kagome's desire to sleep with Inuyasha had suddenly vanished, but had no idea what to tell her friend. It did not seem right simply to tell her that they had most likely been controlled by the demon's whims just as surely as she had. She had not even been able to fully admit that part to Kagome yet.

"I'm worried. What if I… get pregnant? What if he changed his mind? What if when we're together he still thinks about Kikyo? Do you think …?"

Sango sighed, wondering how Kagome could miss something that was so painfully obvious to everyone else. Everyone except Inuyasha, that was. "I don't think so…"

"I just wish… I don't know… that he would just do what he always does, and things could go back to normal."

Sango agreed, but thought it best to change the subject since their lunch - amazingly quick to prepare, as were most of the things Kagome brought back from her world - was nearly ready. She did not think the boys would be much longer at the springs, either, and had no wish to be caught in such a sensitive discussion with Kagome.

Her guess turned out not to be far off, for she and Kagome were only just finishing their noodles when the boys reappeared.

They were silent; the boys taking a seat by the fire, Sango serving their lunch while Kagome dug through her bag for bath supplies. At first Sango was certain that Inuyasha kept glancing at Miroku in anger, no doubt because of something the monk had been teasing him about, but the more she watched them the more she realized that there was more concern than anger in that golden gaze.

She had to admit, if there was one emotion Inuyasha was actually good at hiding, it was concern. And now she really wondered what Miroku had said or done to earn such a reaction.

"Come on," Kagome murmured, "We'd better get going."

Nodding, Sango followed her friend down the path to the hot spring. She only glanced back once, but the boys were as inscrutable as before.

 

Once the girls were out of sight, Miroku let out a deep sigh and sat at the base of a handy tree. His recent insomnia seemed to be catching up to him, tormenting him with feverish daydreams and a crushing sense of fatigue. He knew Inuyasha was bothered by his quietude, but decided to leave that discussion for another time.

He closed his eyes and saw Sango, her beautiful body silhouetted against the door as she shyly reached around to return his kesa to him. In his mind's eye, he caught the door before she could slide it closed, and went to her, claiming her mouth in a deep, needy kiss.

He could feel the strength of her body as she pressed eagerly against him. The Sango of his dreams not only allowed him to cup that wonderful butt in both hands, she enjoyed it.

She was beautiful beyond words and he had wanted this, wanted _her _for so long…

But even in his daydreams the room at the inn melted away and became again the demon's lair, and Sango was again lost in the demon's spell. Miroku swore under his breath, feeling his whole body grow tense with anger as bubbling rage replaced desire.

He had invested so much time - and so much of himself - in winning Sango over, and now the gulf between them loomed wider than ever, in the face of fear, confusion, and Sango's reticence in the face of lost memories. Death was too easy for that demon. It deserved a painful, lingering existence -

Miroku opened his eyes, aware that Inuyasha was now crouching nearby and could probably hear him muttering to himself. The hanyou's ears swiveled and twitched, straining to hear something. Miroku had a good idea what he was listening for. Lately he had taken to listening in on Sango and Kagome's private bath time conversations, searching for reassurance, no doubt.

It had, of course, not escaped Miroku's notice that Inuyasha and Kagome had not snuck off in the middle of the night since they had set out for Kaede's village. In fact, they had been acting positively skittish around one another for the entire journey. He had merely chalked it up to Inuyasha's nervousness in the wake of finding out the extent of the demon's influence, particularly with regards to the rather touchy subject of sex, but with those two nothing could ever be easy.

"You know, Kagome will be furious if she finds out you were eavesdropping," he pointed out, finally.

Inuyasha startled badly at the sudden interruption, then turned to glare at Miroku. "You'd better not even think of telling –" He trailed off as Miroku quirked a brow and inclined his head slightly to one side, indicating Shippo. The young kitsune was busily digging through Kagome's backpack in search of candy, but there was no way he could have missed Inuyasha's less than subtle attempts at listening in on the girls' conversation. In fact, he had only started the frantic digging when Miroku reprimanded Inuyasha.

"Oi, brat." In the blink of an eye, Inuyasha was standing beside the pack, holding Shippo menacingly by the back of his shirt. "If you know what's good for you, you won't breathe a word of this to Kagome. Got it?"

"I wasn't doing anything!" Shippo protested, swinging his arms and legs mightily. "Lemme go! Why do you always have to be so mean to me, Inuyasha?"

Sighing, Miroku added, "That's not quite what I had in mind. You know, one of these days you might try diplomacy." Inuyasha glared at him as he pulled the last lollipop - swiped from Kagome's pack that morning - from its hiding place in his robe, sandwiched between a few stray sutras.

"I believe you were looking for this?" he asked solemnly.

With one last skeptical glare in Inuyasha's direction, Shippo nodded.

Satisfied, Miroku nodded and ordered, "Put him down, Inuyasha." Inuyasha released his grip on Shippo, feigning ignorance when the fox kit landed soundly on his rump. Kneeling down to Shippo's level, Miroku whispered conspiratorially, "If you'll keep quiet about what you saw and heard just now, and what you may see and hear in the next few minutes, I'll give this to you." He twirled the stem of the candy idly between his fingers.

"Yeah! Gimme!" Shippo lunged for the candy, but Miroku managed to keep it out of his grasp.

"Promise first."

"I promise I won't tell," Shippo said, frowning. The look in his eyes said he would tell in a second, if he thought the ensuing mayhem might be entertaining.

Good enough. Miroku tossed the lollipop in his direction, adding, "You had better keep your word, or next time I'll let Inuyasha have his way."

Shippo ran off to safety - which consisted of hiding behind Kirara - to enjoy his prize and Miroku barely had time to stand up before Inuyasha rounded on him angrily.

"What are you trying to prove, monk?"

"I thought that perhaps you would benefit from an example," Miroku explained. "As Kagome could explain, violence is not always the answer. In fact, it often makes things worse."

"Keh. What makes you think I ought to take advice from the likes of you?"

"Well, I may have noticed," he began, ready to flee at the earliest sign of aggression from the hanyou, "that you have been having difficulties with Kagome lately."

"I ain't having no problems with nobody," the hanyou retorted, crossing his arms angrily over his chest.

Miroku quirked a brow. "Really, now?" he asked, as Inuyasha added, "'Sides, it's none of your business anyway."

Grinning, Miroku prodded, "As I recall, you were sleeping with her every night, and now you're not. I can only assume –"

"If you know what's good for you, you'll shove it, monk."

Judging this to be the wisest course of action if he wished to remain in one piece, Miroku shut up.

 

They arrived at Kaede's village the next morning.

Sango had hoped to start feeling better as they drew closer to what had become their base of operations, but things had just seemed to get worse as the days went on. Now she was looking forward merely to a respite from all the travel. Kagome had asked for seven days, but she doubted Inuyasha would be patient enough for that, especially if he found out she did not necessarily need to spend all seven days in her world.

Still, a break would be nice, even if Kaede's village seemed somehow less welcoming than usual.

Shortly after arriving, the group went with Kagome to the well, to bid her farewell and to wish her good luck with her tests, even if they still did not fully understand the reason or importance for such things.

When the familiar flash of blue light had finally faded, the group went their separate ways. Inuyasha disappeared into the forest, and Sango, realizing that Miroku had already disappeared as well, headed back to the village with Shippo and Kaede. She thought it a bit odd that the old priestess had accompanied them into the forest, but perhaps she had simply sensed the tension between them and had sought to ease it in any way she could. Her presence was comforting to Sango, who was beginning to feel relaxed - or trying to - for the first time in many days.

She walked slowly, glad for Kaede's slow pace and the animated chatter between the priestess and fox demon. She even let Kaede talk her into helping out that afternoon. It felt good to help with the chores; the activity kept her mind more on what she was doing and less on what was really bothering her.

But by late afternoon, the chores were done, and Kaede had gone into the village to tend to the needs of the villagers, leaving Sango alone with her thoughts. In the absence of her friends, she found the silence stifling and took to wandering in the forest nearby. She did not know if she would stumble upon Inuyasha or Miroku, but it felt better to be moving than simply sitting and waiting.

She had been meandering among the trees for a while when a sudden rustling of branches caught her attention and she realized she had unconsciously been heading back to the well.

Sango could not keep a smile from tugging at the corners of her mouth when she caught sight of Inuyasha sneaking deeper into the forest. He was heading toward the well. Not even an entire day had passed, and he was already going to Kagome. Such dedication…

Suddenly a hand closed around her wrist.

Recoiling instinctively, Sango yanked her hand back. She realized too late and with no little chagrin that it was just Miroku.

He ignored her surprise and embarrassment. "Come on. If we leave now, we can be back before Inuyasha returns."

She pulled again but he would not release her. "Leave? What are you talking about? Where would we go? What would we do?"

Miroku held her gaze, an unusually serious look upon his face. Sango felt her anger melting away. She could see weariness lurking behind those eyes, and had to fight hard against the urge to touch his face; she yearned to comfort him, to ease whatever burden was tormenting him now.

"We have to go back to where we fought that demon."

She knew what he was talking about, and hated it. "I don't know what you mean."

"The nightmares. They're getting worse, aren't they?"


	8. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

"You know we would have to travel non-stop to get there and back again before Kagome and Inuyasha return," Sango protested. She tried to pull her hand away again, but Miroku refused to release his grip on her wrist. Frustrated, she added, "And that doesn't even take into account any time we would have to spend investigating –"

The serious look refused to leave his face. "Sango, stop."

"But…"

"We'll leave a message with Kaede, then. Lie, if you want. Tell them whatever you wish – that we made a trip to your village, that we decided something might have been amiss after all, that we ran away together to get married and –"

"How can you make jokes at a time like this?"

Miroku shrugged. "I was merely making a few suggestions."

Sango's response was a frown, but she followed him without further protest. As they drew closer to the village, she could feel his tension growing through the hand that still held onto her. They paused for a long moment outside of Kaede's hut; Miroku released her suddenly, allowing her to choose what she would do. She did not want to lie, or even to deceive her friends, but she shared his sense of urgency.

If he had been having nightmares, too... then something could be seriously wrong.

Miroku waited outside while she slipped into the hut to gather Kirara and Hiraikotsu; she had little idea afterward what she excuse she gave the old priestess, only that it sounded painfully flimsy even to her own ears. All she got in response was a small nod accompanied by a smile and a knowing look. She fled, even though she had obviously given Kaede the wrong impression of what was going on, her face stained by a deep blush.

They had only a small amount of light left, but Kirara seemed to understand what they needed her to do, and they made good time that night. Sango found it odd to look down and not see the familiar shape of Inuyasha running below them, carrying Kagome on his back. Traveling with just Miroku was completely different, but almost comfortable.

She knew it was ludicrous – and was mentally preparing herself to spend the next few days fending off unwanted touches and perverted comments – but she felt better being around Miroku than being with the rest of the group right now. As nice as it was to have another girl around to talk to, she just couldn't bring herself to tell Kagome everything; with Miroku she almost felt as if she didn't have to say anything at all. He understood how she felt, and he probably already knew more about what had happened than she did, anyway.

And so far, though she might be reluctant to admit it, he was being a perfect gentleman. She yearned to ask how he had known about her nightmares; had he been watching over her while she slept, or did he share her dreams? But for the moment he seemed disinclined to talk, and she was not willing to press the matter and risk disturbing the delicate peace.

The moon was high in the sky, and provided them with plenty of light. They did not have to stop until it was quite late, and Sango found herself reluctant to stop even then. Still, she had to admit that they, and especially Kirara, needed rest if they were to keep going at such a pace.

"Um, I think," she began, hesitating ever so slightly.

"We should stop for the night," he agreed, without needing to hear the rest of what she had to say. He must have noticed that Kirara had been flying gradually lower, just as Sango had.

The forest was quiet around them when Kirara touched down; the only sounds were those of the occasional insect or small animal, and a spring that babbled nearby. Sango took a deep breath and stretched, as was her long-standing habit, and went about setting up a campsite. Anything to distract her from the reality that she had snuck off with Miroku – alone.

Now that she paused to think about her actions, she was beginning to realize that this was not the smartest thing she could have done. She hesitated, firewood held in a deathgrip but not yet added to the fire, becoming aware that Miroku was watching her through tired eyes.

Kirara mewed. Sango looked down at the cat demon beside her before returning her gaze to the monk.

She had always known that he was a womanizer, and had assumed accordingly that he was at least minimally skilled in the art of seduction; under the intensity of that gaze, she had to wonder if he had ever truly tried to seduce her before. Where had that thought come from? Her mind had been all out of sorts lately, and now, she decided, it was getting the better of her.

The monk rose, let out an amused breath, and moved toward her. Gently taking her hands in his, he helped her feed the fire. He let his hands linger over hers a moment longer than necessary before chiding, "You shouldn't stare like that, you know. People might get the wrong impression."

Sango let out a breath she had not realized she was holding and blushed bright red. Miroku grinned.

"Or am I wrong?"

His face was so close to hers that she could feel his breath against her skin. She knew she should pull away, should…

She wanted to kiss him.

The thought struck her like a lightning bolt and was enough to send her stumbling backwards, having nearly tripped over Kirara.

Miroku chuckled and stood, offering her a hand. She hesitated for a moment before accepting; if she had thought he might try something perverted, she was disappointed. And with some horror she realized that she _was _disappointed.

Here they were, alone in the middle of nowhere, and he was being perfectly considerate and not trying anything. She was not quite sure what she had expected him to do, but to be disappointed because he didn't have his hands all over her the moment they were alone? What was wrong with her?

"Sango," Miroku said, the unusual husky tone of his voice interrupting her thoughts. "You can let go now." He ran his thumb over the back of her hand. She had not noticed how cold she was until that very moment.

"You look tired, you should get some rest," he added, clearly concerned.

She frowned and reluctantly pulled her hand away. "We should talk."

"About what?"

She hesitated for a moment. "About what you said before we left Kaede's village. You've been having nightmares, too?"

He nodded. "It seems that every dream, no matter how pleasant the beginning, ends back in that demon's lair."

"Me too," she admitted. She hugged her arms around her waist. "I don't even remember how I got there…"

"Here, sit down," he said, taking a seat and motioning next to him. "I can tell you what I saw…"

"Please," she murmured, sitting next to him, "I'm not sure I want to know right now. It's troubling me enough just remembering bits and pieces of it."

"That is why I thought perhaps I should share what I know with you. If I can clarify things for you, or say anything that might help…"

It was strange to talk with him this way. She and Miroku seldom had truly candid conversations. He liked to play too much and she disliked showing her true feelings because they too often got out of hand, but right now she felt it was best not to hide.

She sighed. "I don't know. I-it's confusing. And I –" She turned away. How could she even bear to look at him? This conversation had been a bad idea from the start, and now a maelstrom of feelings, anger and fear and insecurity that she had kept locked up for days, was threatening to burst free.

"Sango, what's wrong?"

She did not answer; she did not know what to say. The struggle to contain her inner turmoil was making her shake. Finally, "I should never have done this. I should have gone back to my village, to seek guidance from my ancestors instead."

Miroku frowned. "If I thought running away would solve the problem, do you think I would be here?"

"Of course not." She turned and glared, forgetting the unshed tears that still threatened to fall. "Besides, it's not 'running away' to seek guidance from the ancestors."

"No," he agreed, "I suppose it's not."

Kirara, having transformed into her larger demon form, walked over and nuzzled her head against Sango. The demon slayer smiled and stroked a hand down her companion's cheek.

Laying down beside her human, the cat demon flicked her twin tails in Miroku's direction. Sango cuddled against the cat and closed her eyes, effectively ending the conversation. She heard the faint rustle of Miroku resettling himself; when she opened one eye to glance in his direction, she saw that the monk had his eyes closed and looked as if he were asleep or meditating.

Best not to bother him again, then. Sango closed her eyes again and drifted to sleep.

 

A long while after Sango had gone to sleep, Miroku opened his eyes.

He had too much to think about, and could not settle his mind enough to sleep. The fire, now much smaller than earlier, cracked faintly. He turned, seeking Sango's form. He let out a sigh, a breath he had not even realized he was holding, when he saw that she was still huddled against Kirara. Her breaths were deep and even, and he was glad to see that she was sleeping and seemed to be free of nightmares.

He frowned. He wanted her to feel comfortable with him, and had no desire to return to the old stalemate between them. But circumstances being what they were, he was no longer sure which path was best.

He had thought he should do as Sango insisted she wanted, and behave as a 'gentleman' toward her, but that so far seemed to have actually done more harm than good. Sure, Sango had agreed to come with him on this crazy journey, but his refusal to butt in had also had something - perhaps more than just 'something' - to do with getting them both into this mess in the first place. At the same time, he had no doubt that returning to his old behaviors would result in more distance between them. Her reactions to his behavior, in truth intended to put her at ease by returning to routine, on their journey back to Kaede's village were proof enough of that. He would never have admitted such things aloud, much less to Sango, but it was certainly worth thinking about.

He had to force himself to look away but found he could not stop staring at her. She looked so peaceful when she slept. He longed to share in that peace, or even just to lie beside her.

One of Kirara's tails twitched, brushing against him and disrupting his thoughts. He looked up and met the demon's gaze for a long moment. He wondered, not for the first time, what she thought of him and if she approved of his feelings for Sango.

He watched for a while longer, but the cat demon was as mysterious and silent as ever.

 

They set out again early the next morning and traveled as swiftly as possible for the next several days, despite being waylaid by torrential rain for almost two whole days. Miroku felt his apprehension growing as he began to notice familiar landmarks and realized they were quite close to the village they sought.

Sango seemed to have noticed it too, because she glanced repeatedly in his direction before squeezing Kirara against her chest. She was carrying the cat demon, and had suggested they walk for at least the morning to give the faithful demon a break. Morning had turned to afternoon, and they had continued in silence.

There was a not-quite uncomfortable tension in the air, something that had been building between them since their first night out. Miroku rather liked it; he enjoyed the way he would occasionally catch her glancing in his direction, and the way she sometimes seemed unable to look away from him, the blushes that tinted her cheeks every time he so much as hinted that he knew she was interested in him - and that her interest might be reciprocated.

They received a warm welcome at the village when they arrived that afternoon; the villagers recognized them and were happy to see them return, though they had never expected to see any of their heroes again. They were given a room at the inn free of charge, and were invited to join the innkeeper and his wife for dinner that night, and suddenly found themselves free of the hustle and bustle as the villagers went back to their homes and their work.

"Are you coming?" Miroku asked.

"Hm?" Sango was sitting on the edge of the inn's veranda, with Kirara still cuddled in her arms.

"I thought I would go get some rest before dinner," he informed her.

"I'd like to stay here for a bit," she told him finally.

Shrugging, Miroku headed into the building to find the room the innkeeper had so kindly agreed to let them use.

He had barely shut the door behind him when there came a soft rapping against the wooden frame.

When he slid the door open, one of the young village girls slipped inside without a word. The maiden paused for a moment before practically flinging herself at him. "Please, Lord Monk! You saved our village from that horrible demon, but now my father's home is being haunted! You must help my family!"

Miroku caught the distraught young woman by the shoulders and held her at arm's length, looking her in the eyes. "My lovely lady, I will be glad to assist –"

And that, of course, was when Sango walked in.

The slayer's expression went from calm to furious in the blink of an eye. The pleasant tension of the journey had obviously not been so pleasant from Sango's perspective, for he felt it boil out of control now.

"It's always something with you, isn't it, monk?" she said darkly, her eyes hidden behind a curtain of black hair. He wondered for an instant if she was taking his flirtations too seriously, or if he was not taking them seriously enough.

The village maiden recoiled, fear in her eyes, but Miroku resolutely turned his attention to the demon slayer.

"Sango," he said and paused. If she wanted to be angry with him there was really very little he could say to change her mind. She had so little faith in him; not, he had to admit, that he had ever really given her much reason to trust him. Especially not now, given his fickle behavior over the past few days.

His hand moved in her direction – he did not really know whether he intended to grab her or hold her – and her head snapped to follow the movement. "Don't touch me."

Miroku struggled to get a grip on his rapidly fraying temper. What on earth did this woman want from him? She despised his 'womanizing' and so he had done his best to do things her way – and had got himself exactly nowhere by doing it. He had tried to go back to the way things had been, and had only gotten scolded for it. He had finally thought he was making a little progress... and now this. Now she was upset over what truly had been nothing at all and he had no idea how to calm her down.

"Sango," he said urgently as she turned and walked away, but aside from a stiffening of her posture as she stormed off she gave no sign of having heard him.

He sighed. This was not going well at all.

He did not like the idea of her going off on her own right now, but knew he had no choice but to let her blow off some steam and try to confront her later. He only hoped she wouldn't lose her head and do something foolish in the meantime.

_Please, Sango, be safe_. He turned back to the village girl and bowed. "Please, my lady, tell me what I can do to help you."

 

"Sango."

She stiffened at the sound of her name.

She had spent several hours wandering angrily in the forest near the village, contemplating the foolishness of this latest fight with Miroku, and had hoped to sneak back unnoticed. Obviously she was not lucky enough for that. Kirara mewed softly, and Sango rubbed the cat demon's head gently.

At least she had made it back to the inn without any embarrassing encounters. She glanced in the monk's direction.

"Yes?"

"I apologize for my behavior earlier today," he said; his words sounded almost _rehearsed_. Almost like he had been thinking about this since the moment she left. Sango narrowed her eyes.

"There is nothing to forgive," she admitted. "I – I'm sorry, too. I needed some time to think about it, but you… you didn't do anything. I was – " She had overreacted because she was feeling so damnably... She tried to tell herself it was exhaustion, or stress, but the fact of the matter was that she was insecure. And she was trying to admit that, or at least that it really was her fault and not his, but -

He smiled. "You don't need to explain, Sango."

"I –" Somehow she just could not manage to continue, the way he was smiling at her like that.

"Sango, stop."

She did not want to stop. She wanted to do something, say something, anything to let him know she was sorry. Lately he had done nothing but stand beside her and do his best to support her, and she had immediately doubted him at the very first opportunity.

"I –"

"It will be time for dinner soon," he interrupted smoothly. "We can talk afterward, if you want."

There was a soft sound at the door. Sango slid it open; it was one of the serving girls, who bowed and murmured, "Dinner will be served soon, Lord Monk, Lady Slayer. The lord innkeeper and his wife would be honored if you would join them."

Miroku smiled and said, "We would be honored, as well." As he passed Sango on his way out of the room, he whispered, "Meet me tonight if you want to talk. By that big tree we passed earlier this afternoon."

Sango frowned. Why not here? She paused a moment, wondering what he had in mind, before hurrying after him.

The dinner was pleasant enough; the innkeeper and his wife were as kind as Sango remembered, and she was pleased not to be offered any special "hero's" dishes. The food was flavorful and plentiful, and she found that conversation flowed easily, though it was all of little consequence.

After dinner, they parted ways. The innkeeper and his wife had already retreated to their quarters, and Miroku headed out of the inn, leaving Sango to her own devices. She felt decidedly odd about the whole thing.

She had wondered, before, what might happen if she were ever to agree to run off with Miroku. Now she had an opportunity to do just that, without Inuyasha or Kagome to spy on them, and she was not sure what she wanted to do.

Kirara was waiting for her in their room, and purred when Sango gave her a portion of fish saved from dinner. Sango rubbed the cat's belly and sighed. "Kirara, what should I do?"

 

Miroku had taken up a position at the base of a tree near to where he had told Sango to meet him, sitting with his back pressed against it as if for support. It was chilly and still a bit damp, but the niche formed by the tree's roots provided some protection from the wind and overall was not uncomfortable. He was not sure whether or not he really expected Sango to show up.

He leaned back and closed his eyes.

"Why did you ask me to meet you here?"

He had been half asleep and had not heard her approach, and was startled by her sudden question. Turning slightly, he gave her a serious look. "I thought you might like an excuse to get away from the village for a while." He could not tell if his guess had been correct, but motioned for her to sit next to him anyway. She complied, but remained as infuriatingly out of reach as ever.

"I," she began, but then seemed to think the better of what she had planned to say and said instead, "thank you."

Miroku could not help but notice that she had come this far wearing just her yukata as protection against the evening chill, and had not even brought Kirara with her. It was obvious that she had not been thinking straight lately. Not that he could really blame her.

Suddenly he lurched upright, limbs stiff and awkward from sitting still too long in the cold, and pulled his kesa free. Sango snapped to attention, something like betrayal and fear in her eyes, and watched him almost warily. For just one second she did not trust him. He pretended not to see. It was easier if he did not. Carefully he draped the fabric, warmed by his body heat, over her shoulders and offered a comforting smile.

He let his hands linger for a moment before withdrawing to sit beside the tree again.

She was sitting pensively, her legs curled beneath her, her hands clutching at the fabric around her. It was one of those positions that, in his opinion, simply radiated a desire to be touched. Somehow, through some titanic force of will, he managed to restrain himself. His hands curled into fists from the effort of resisting, but he knew that for her sake he would have to. It would be so much more pleasant to grab her, get hit, and have everything be all right again. If only it were that easy.

"Thank you," she reiterated just as he was going to speak, "for not telling Kagome and the others what happened. And… for coming back here with me."

He nodded. There was really nothing to say. No matter how much he wished she would let him and the others help her, he also understood that she did not want pity and, more importantly, she did not wish to be - or feel - weak. It distressed him, as the only one in their group that knew what had happened, to be unable to comfort her.

"I just…" she trailed off and was silent for a long moment, thinking. "I feel so embarrassed. I'm a demon slayer, and yet it was so easy for it to get me under its control. I almost let that thing kill you, and then it would have gone after Kagome and Inuyasha and the others. It shouldn't have happened. I shouldn't have let it happen."

"No, it should not have happened, but you should not blame yourself," he murmured, thinking. She had been blaming herself all this time. On top of everything else... "That demon tricked us all."

She was shaking, just barely. He wondered if it was from the cold or something else. "I know that. It's just… Nothing actually happened. In the end, you stopped anything from happening to me. I - I'm glad it was you that saved me." Her eyes glistened with unshed tears.

"Sango – " _You saved me just as much as I saved you. _He cut himself off, unable to actually say the words. She wouldn't believe he'd ended up in over his head anyway.

He shifted, taking her hand in his and squeezing gently in a last ditch effort to comfort her before he lost his mind. To sit by and be unable to help her – yet again – was almost more than he could take. He wanted badly to slay the demon that had done this to her, but the monster already lay dead miles and days behind them. He longed to draw her close and kiss her until she was happy again, but he knew that was just as likely to push her away as to help her move on.

There was so much tragedy in this young woman's life, and yet she somehow remained so very strong. She clung to his hand like a lifeline and tried valiantly not to let the tears fall. It was mostly futile. One, two, plop, plop, then more and more and more. The shameful tears fell despite her best efforts. That did it; that was the breaking point. He had had enough of helplessness.

So he did the only thing he could do: he gathered her in his arms and held her close and whispered soothing words into her hair while she cried. At least it was something.

She had cried like this only once before, at the beginning of their journey together. That time she had cried on Kagome's shoulder. Now it would seem she turned to him for comfort and support. He was glad enough of that, thrilled at her newly rediscovered trust, but none of that could ease the hollow ache within.

He had a feeling that they still had a long road ahead of them.


	9. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Kagome sighed and reluctantly set down her pencil and closed the textbook she had been reading from. She could hear the soft patter of rain against the roof of the house, and wondered where Inuyasha was. Had he gone back to the feudal era, or was he still lurking somewhere on the shrine grounds?

When he'd showed up, two days ago and only hours after she herself had arrived, she had nearly lost it. She needed time to think, to work out her worries, and, perhaps most importantly, to study. She did have a test coming up, after all. But when Souta had accidentally blabbed that she did not need the full seven days she had insisted on…

One thing had, of course, led to another. Inuyasha had lost his temper, and, having put up with him for two whole days when what she really wanted was to be left alone, she had yelled right back. He had fled the house, and she had no real way of knowing where he might have gone.

She groaned. _I can't take it anymore!_

Shoving the textbook and notes away from her, she stood up. Her legs shook for a moment, unsteady after hours of sitting, but she took off down the stairs as quickly as she could. She fairly flew down the stairs, round the corner, through the kitchen, and out the back door. She did not even bother to grab an umbrella on her way out.

Somehow, she knew where she would find him.

She spoke his name from the base of the Goshinboku and knew that he heard her. No matter how angry he got, it seemed she could always find him back where their journey had begun. Instinct had not steered her wrong yet. If she squinted upward through the rain, she could see the faint glint of golden eyes looking back from far overhead.

"Inuyasha," she repeated, "I'm sorry."

He looked away.

"_Inuyasha_," she said again, more urgently this time. It had been pleasantly chilly during the day, but now that the sun had set and it was pouring rain it was downright cold. She did not want to stay outside any longer than she had to, and she definitely did not want him to stay out in the cold by himself. "Please come down from there and come inside with me. I'm sorry."

She stayed put, staring up into the tree and hoping for any sign of the hanyou for a long time. And for a long time there was nothing. No sound, not the slightest hint of movement.

She wondered for a second if she should just give up and go inside and let him brood in the tree after all, and then there was a flash of red in the dark and Inuyasha landed softly beside her. It was uncanny, the way he could jump like that. And yet, it was so very much a part of who he was that she almost smiled at the sudden entrance.

"Look, Inuyasha… I – I'm sorry I told you to leave me alone. I didn't mean for you to have to stay out here by yourself," she gushed, guilt forcing her onward in a rush. "It's just that I really need to study for this test and –" She stopped abruptly. The look on his face showed more hurt than usual. "Inuyasha…"

"Kagome." His voice held little of its customary anger and bluster. Instead, she heard… loneliness.

"Inuyasha, what's wrong?" _I apologized for yelling at him earlier…_

"What did I do?"

Kagome frowned. He looked almost like a hurt puppy. As much as a rough-around-the-edges hanyou that killed demons for a living could look like a hurt puppy. "Well when I need to study, I have to be able to focus on my schoolwork…" She trailed off uncertainly.

"Keh, never mind. Forget I said anything," he grumbled, taking off toward the well house.

"No, wait!" She caught one of his hands in both of hers, had enough time to feel the roughness of calluses, the hardness of his claws as he almost, but not quite, slipped through her grip. His hands were cold and wet from being out in the rain. "Please, tell me what's wrong."

He refused to look at her, and muttered something so quietly that she almost did not hear. "I never shoulda listened to that damn monk."

"Wait, this is because of something Miroku said?"

The wind gusted strongly; instinctively she dropped his hand and hugged her arms close to her chest, shivering.

When she looked up again, Inuyasha had closed the gap between them, standing just inches from her. He was so close she could feel the heat radiating off of him, even after he had been out in this horrible weather for hours. Determined to get to the bottom of this, she glared up at him even though she wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him and hold him close.

"What did Miroku say that got you this worked up?" she demanded, as sternly as she could through her slight trembling.

She searched his eyes, and her expression softened.

He looked away.

"Just _tell_ me." Without even thinking about it, her hands stroked along his arm, finding one hand and cupping it between the both of hers.

"The idiot said I must've done something to make you not want to be with me anymore," he said, finally.

With those words, Kagome felt as if her heart had shattered into a million pieces. And then rage bubbled up from somewhere deep inside, a place within her that she had never really thought could exist. "What?!"

When he finally dared look at her again, she could see his thoughts in his eyes. He wanted to know what he had done to push her away. She stared at him, unable to look away; she vaguely remembered a conversation she had had with Sango, before returning to her own time. She had told Sango a little bit of what she felt, of how she was worried. And…

Her shoulders slumped, just a little.

She had started doubting him, out of nowhere, and for no reason that she could recall, beyond her own fears and lack of confidence. _Was that what came between us, all of a sudden?_

She wanted to kick herself. Or – something. How could she have been so stupid?

She blinked, realizing that his expression had shifted more to worry than hurt and confusion. "Oh, Inuyasha… It's nothing you did," she said, sighing softly. She tightened her grip on his hand, suddenly not wanting to let go.

"I've just been worried about my tests," she continued, getting a better grip on her composure with every word. It might not be the whole truth, but she felt as if things were heading in the right direction, at last.

He was still looking at her, with doubt in those golden eyes of his.

"Come on," she urged. "Let's go inside. I'll even make you some ramen, if you want."

One of Inuyasha's ears twitched. "Keh. Fine. You'll freeze to death if we stay out in this much longer."

Kagome smiled. Underneath his disparaging response, she knew that he was just as eager to make things right as she was. Maybe she could take a break from studying after all, just for a little bit…

 

Sango had a lot to think about as she and Kirara headed out of the village, following the demon's trail as best as they could. Their first stop had been the lair where the demon had taken her to be bait in its trap; Sango had felt some trepidation about returning to the site, but now it seemed to merely be a hole in the ground with some small adjoining tunnels. Dusty, dim, and empty.

All of the tunnels had ended in dead-ends, but Sango had followed the most prominent tunnel, the one where she and Miroku had found the demon's tree stump origin, and had traced its path again on the surface. She decided that they should head in the direction that tunnel had been pointing. If there was something else behind this, she felt that she would find it by heading that way.

Wracking her brain for knowledge about plant demons, she had to surmise that any roots such a demon put out could sprout new demons, which meant they would radiate outward from a central point. That central point was what she was hoping to find.

She hardly expected to find anything on this first exploratory outing aside from a few vague clues, but it gave her an excuse to get away from Miroku and an opportunity to think things through. She did not know what she had been thinking when she had chosen to meet him in the forest; but then again, it had not turned out all that bad. She had actually felt _good_ when she woke up. It felt almost as if a burden had been lifted.

It was a relief, almost, to know that Miroku knew she was upset, and wanted to stand by her and see her through the rough times, even if she was still having knee-jerk reactions to compromising situations. Such behavior should have been unacceptable at this point, but he was being remarkably patient about it. She realized ruefully that she still owed him an apology for overreacting like that, never mind that he seemed determined to prevent her from doing so.

She slowed her pace, scuffing her feet in the leaf litter underfoot. The day had started brightly enough, but things had gotten murkier and murkier since she left the village. Kirara paused and glanced at her worriedly.

She did not really know what she had been expecting to find, coming out here so early and on her own, but she had been walking for quite some time and still had nothing to show for her effort. There was not even so much as a hint that anything might be amiss. Perhaps she had been wrong in her assumption that she would find another demon; maybe she should have done a more thorough search of the demon's lair.

The demon's lair. The very thought of the place sent shivers down her spine. She had already ventured down there once today, and though she was loathe to admit it, she had not investigated it as well as she should have because she had wanted desperately to get out. She knew she would eventually have to face her fears and go back, but she did not want to.

"Kirara," she murmured, coming to a stop and running a hand over the demon's head. Kirara nuzzled her head comfortingly against the slayer's hand.

_I'm going about this all wrong, trying to go a dozen different ways at once… This is not how I was taught…_

Sango sighed. "Come on, Kirara. We're not going to find anything like this. We need to go back and start over." She did not sound particularly determined, even to herself. She drew herself up, straightened her shoulders, and set off toward the village.

_I failed once. I cannot fail again._

She knew this was a dangerous line of thought, and struggled to find something else to focus on; her fingers closed in a vise-like grip around a fistful of Kirara's fur. The ever-patient feline made a soft rumbling sound but did not otherwise object to being treated so carelessly.

Her feet moved more slowly than perhaps they should have; she knew she needed to go back and start her investigation anew, but she did not think she was ready to face Miroku yet. It had been liberating, in some ways, to let her guard down and show him her fears. But at the same time she was unsure how to react to him now, when she had shown how vulnerable she could be. She was a demon slayer, and it would be most improper for a demon slayer to show her weaknesses.

Still, she could not think that what she had done was so bad. It was no different, she thought, from the times she had comforted Kohaku after a particularly bad dream.

But it _was _different.

She blushed, remembering the feeling of waking up in Miroku's arms. She could not recall a time in the past where she had felt so safe and warm – she was the one who was supposed to defend, not be protected. But she had felt embarrassed too, and glad that he was still sleeping, when she began to notice the way his body responded to being so near to her. True, she had known that he desired her, but knowing it and _knowing_ it were two very different things. What had been a vague sense that he was as attracted to her as she to him had suddenly coalesced into actual knowledge of that fact.

Her mind drifted back to an incident she had tried to forget, something she had the strange sensation of having not remembered until this very moment... and not just because it was embarrassing to think of, but because the idea of it was so very alluring.

It had happened on the morning of their encounter with the demon; Sango had woken to the sound of Inuyasha's grumbling, only to find that there was no sign of Miroku and that Kagome was still sleeping. After rousing her friend she had gone into the forest to dress for the day; at the time she had a feeling that it would be best to wear her demon slayer's armor rather than her kosode.

In the quest for privacy she had headed into the forest and away from potential prying eyes. She had dressed quickly, but had not make her way back to camp immediately.

Instead, she had wandered closer and closer to the stream, almost as if compelled by an invisible force; she refused to speculate as to whether it had been curiosity alone or something more. Inuyasha had said that Miroku had gone for water, but there had been no sign of him. That was when her curiosity – and the slightest bit of worry – had kicked in. She had followed the stream for a short while when she caught sight of him through the undergrowth.

He had been…

_Oh, gods_. She shuddered, her rebellious body fairly trembling at the memory.

He had been masturbating. The very thought of it was mortifying. Arousing.

No wonder he had wandered farther than necessary. He must have wanted some privacy, and she…

She had been unable look away.

She had watched in rapt, mute fascination, as he drew his hand up and down along his exposed length; her eyes had widened ever so slightly as she watched him come, groaning with his release. It had not been enough – she had wanted _more_.

She had wanted to hear him say _her name_.

And then, realizing the situation she was in, she had skittered off into the forest and back to camp as quickly as she could. She had been positive that she would trip and fall, or make some minute noise and alert him to her presence, but so far as she could tell she had done no such thing. Luck had been on her side, and she had made it back to camp before him, and with no one the wiser.

But the thought of it had refused to leave her mind, even when she focused all of her energy on not blushing bright red and on pretending she had seen nothing out of the ordinary. She told herself that it might not have had anything to do with her. The problem was that she wanted it to have _everything_ to do with her. She had never felt so wanton, except, maybe, in thinking about it now.

She itched to touch herself.

_GIVE IN_.

That voice stopped her in her tracks and chilled her to the bone. She had heard it before... in her nightmares and, she recalled, after she had found herself in the demon's lair. And, this close, it was haunting her again.

_No, I won't_, she thought, and repeated it over and over in her mind. _You're _dead_. Whatever it is you want me to do now, I'm not going to do it._

It almost helped to think it like that. The last thing she needed right now was another distraction, least of all one that had to do with Miroku. Things had been awkward enough between them lately. There was no need to make it worse.

Still, something about whole it nagged at her. The memory had sparked something else within her, but she could not quite put her finger on what it was. Shaking her head, she kept walking.

Realizing that they were quite close to the village by now, she slowed her pace and let her fingers tangle in Kirara's fur. She wasn't ready to go back just yet.

She was sure that there was something else. Something she needed to remember, maybe.

She opened her mouth to speak, though she forgot what she had intended to say for at that moment she was suddenly overwhelmed by intense pain and… what felt like a memory. "Nggh," she ground out, her body going rigid. She was aware of Kirara turning to stare balefully at her before everything was lost amidst flashes of light…

Herself - naked. Her body heated, burning with need.

Moving -

Beneath someone - him. _Miroku_.

Pulling him to her, begging, pleading, needing –

Feeling the demon within her blood, hearing its silent laughter echoing in her ears, and with no choice -

No choice…

And she - she had stopped resisting long ago.

She cried out some wordless sound, and at the same time tears burst from her eyes. The sudden sensation of hot fluid dripping down her cheeks was enough to break her out of the spell.

It felt like a nightmare, but she was not sleeping; an unwanted memory, surging beneath the surface. She shook her head to clear it, but still felt unsteady. Already, the tears were gone, banished by fear and horror. She was breathing heavily and her knees felt shaky, her whole body pulsing from the strength of the memory.

It might have been pleasant; it horrified her, even as her body yearned for it.

What had she done, under the demon's control? What might she have done that she still could not remember? Had she no honor left?

She dropped to her knees, realizing belatedly that Kirara had moved to support her. She buried her face against the firecat's shoulder. The last vestiges were fading now, but she could not help but think…

The way the demon had preyed upon her, the way it had captured her so easily and bent her to its will…

"Was it because of the way I feel… about him?" she wondered aloud, her voice muffled by thick fur. "Is that how… why… it took control of me?" She had always felt safe telling her secrets to Kirara, and this was no exception; the cat demon simply looked at her with deep, red eyes, and said nothing.

Sango sighed and gave the cat a quick hug. She glanced around surreptitiously; there was no one in sight. No one had seen. She gnawed her lower lip, clambered to her feet, and made it a few steps without falling.

Gaining confidence, she kept going, her legs moving faster and faster; Kirara followed somewhat more sedately, but always keeping an eye on her companion.

Sango knew she was running away from the memories, wanted to get away, needed a moment's peace and some time to think – and no more distractions.

Such was not to be.

She paused, annoyed, at the outskirts of the village and watched as Miroku caught sight of her and headed her way.

 

Miroku woke with a start. He was cold and stiff and most definitely alone. He did not even remember falling asleep, just holding Sango while she cried herself to sleep.

There had been no dreams, no fears or nightmares… just Sango and comforting darkness. He felt more rested than he had in ages.

It was light now, the morning fog already long gone.

But some time during the night, Sango had disappeared. She had even taken the time to wrap his kesa back around him like a blanket. He wondered if she had gone back to the village, and why she had not thought to wake him.

He would have much preferred waking up with Sango in his arms. Then again, that might be too much temptation for a poor monk to handle…

He briefly imagined coupling with her here, in the cold and open air, the way her body would react to his, to the chill...

His morning erection twitched, demanding his attention. Miroku sighed. Perhaps it was for the best that she was gone already. He had few doubts as to how she would react if she knew the effect she had on him – embarrassment, undoubtedly. A response in kind, perhaps… If he was lucky. He knew better than to dwell on that particular subject.

He shoved himself upright and wrapped the kesa back around him as was proper, tying it with fingers stiff from cold. He grabbed his staff from where he had stashed it the previous night and focused on inner calm, willing his blood to cease its tumultuous rushing and his arousal to cool. Ordinarily he would have gladly taken advantage of time to himself, but the morning chill made the thought of self-gratification somewhat less gratifying. Besides, he had more important things to do, like finding Sango.

He was glad that she seemed to be coming around, even if it was happening more slowly than he would have liked, but he was not entirely sure it was a good idea for her to wander off on her own. As far as he was concerned it was for the best that they stick together and get to the bottom of the mess they had gotten themselves into - and not just because he enjoyed being in close proximity to her.

They had been caught easily last time, despite Sango's insistence that it was all her fault, and neither of them had any real clue what was going on. He did not want to be trapped again, and he would die before letting another demon take control of Sango like that. All of which would have been much easier if he knew what to look for and where he might find it.

He set a brisk pace and found himself back at the village altogether too quickly; at least anger and his focus on finding Sango had quelled his arousal, for now. His placid façade was back in place as soon as he entered the village, smiling and making small talk with the grateful citizens as he headed toward the inn.

He had been hoping to find Sango there, but their room was empty. He chose to take it as a good sign that Kirara was missing. The only reason the cat demon would have disappeared would be to keep an eye on Sango. Which was all well and good, but left him with no clue as to where they might be.

He allowed himself a moment of frustration before heading back into the village. If it came down to it, he would ask the villagers if anyone had seen either of his companions, but for now he was content to search on his own. Even as he told himself that he had no idea where to start looking, he knew where he had best start.

The demon's lair had been the start of the problem - and was where his dreams kept taking him - so he had little doubt that Sango would want to investigate it. What he did not know was whether or not she would do so without him. Nevertheless, he found himself walking in that direction when his question was answered for him.

Sango, looking somewhat distraught, appeared out of the forest with Kirara at her side.

Smiling at last, Miroku made his way toward them, his expression darkening as he noticed the look on her face. Had she been crying?


	10. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

"Sango," Miroku greeted, bowing politely.

She acknowledged him with a slight nod of her head. He stopped in front of her. "You gave me a scare this morning," he began, a slight teasing tone seeping into his voice. He was not about to admit the full extent of his worry to himself, much less to Sango.

"I did?"

"Well, I must admit I was a bit alarmed to wake this morning and find you gone," he admitted casually, as if waking up together were an everyday occurrence.

"Oh, that," she said, looking away. "I woke early and went to get Kirara, so we could do some exploring. I… didn't want to disturb you."

"So did you find anything?" He decided that it would be best to drop the subject of her disappearance for now. She already seemed to be upset enough that he did not want to push her.

Her expression was downcast. "No. I'm not even sure we're looking in the right place anymore. This forest feels… empty." She took a deep breath, and let it go. "Like there's nothing here."

"I don't sense anything out of the ordinary," Miroku agreed, thoughtfully. "Then again, the demon we fought was quite good at disguising its true nature." Noticing something odd, he added, "Where is Hiraikotsu?"

"I left it at the inn. In these tunnels it would just be an extra burden," she explained. "And to be honest, I did not think I would find anything."

He nodded agreement with her assessment of the situation. Besides, she was right. She would not have been able to use Hiraikotsu in a fight even if she had taken it with her. But he could see the difference in her nonetheless. Dressed in her slayer's armor and armed with her familiar weapons, she was a force to be reckoned with. Uncertainty still lingered in her eyes, but even that was fading.

Sango frowned. "I… think it may have been a mistake to come back here. Did you dream last night?" A blush spread slowly across her cheeks, no doubt because of where she had spent the night.

Trying to remain serious, Miroku shook his head. "Do you think it's a coincidence, that the nightmares stopped as soon as we returned?"

"No."

He touched a hand to her shoulder for a moment. "We'll go together, and look. Perhaps we'll have more luck that way."

Sango looked shocked and a little flushed for the space of a heartbeat, then nodded.

As they headed down the forest path, Miroku kept his eyes open; it was much easier to take in his surroundings when he wasn't chasing Inuyasha at top speed. The entrance to the demon's lair was farther from the village than he had remembered, though it was doubtful that he would ever forget the descent into the tunnels.

The edges of the entrance were eroded, and the brush that had once camouflaged it was still piled where they had left it. He could even still vaguely make out the signs of Inuyasha's fight with the guards.

Heading into the demon's lair felt a good deal less worrisome, with Sango in front of him guiding Kirara's descent. He much preferred knowing that she was safe. As they landed at the bottom of the shaft it became obvious that Sango had not been lying: it really did look like nothing more than an abandoned hole in the ground.

Miroku leaned his staff against a nearby wall and lit one of the torches with some of the matches he'd swiped from Kagome ages ago. He guessed Sango had used the same torch earlier, because it was lying on the floor instead of in one of the sconces that lined the wall.

He frowned. The thing was vaguely sticky, and it tingled against his hand, increasing in force the longer he held it.

"Did you find something?" Sango asked, taking note of his interest in the torch.

"Possibly," he murmured, removing a sutra from his robe with his free hand, and applying the holy paper to the base of the torch. The entire thing burst into flames before evaporating. He tossed it away before the flames could catch anything important. "Apparently the torches were imbued with youki," he commented. "Probably where the miasma came from."

Sango nodded her agreement; he could barely see the motion in the dim, filtered light. He fetched the next torch and lit that one, ignoring the uncomfortable sensation of it against his hand.

Seeing his grimace, she offered, "I can take it, if you want."

He shook his head. "I'd rather you be ready to fight, in case something should happen."

She seemed to accept that answer, and led the way deeper into the tunnel. The light from the torch did not illuminate anything that looked out of the ordinary, aside from the rows of torches on each wall.

The entrance tunnel meandered for some distance before finally opening up into a larger room; Miroku remembered this room particularly well, for this was where he had encountered Sango and the demon. It was a large space, and poorly illuminated despite their torch.

There was the straw pallet where the demon had set its trap, and more torches lined the walls, but nothing appeared to have been touched since their departure. Sango seemed disinclined to linger there, not that he could particularly blame her, and headed toward the other end of the room. Kirara turned and cast a baleful stare at Miroku, who hastened to follow.

This end of the room narrowed gradually, and was close to where they had found the demon's roots. There was no sign of any demonic activity now, just dust and dirt and ash. Sango crouched down to investigate the soil, then pressed and prodded the walls, seeking hidden entryways. "Nothing," she grumbled, half to herself. "It all looks normal."

"Let's check the rest, then," Miroku said, though he suspected their search would turn up little or nothing.

His suspicions proved correct, and the rest of the room failed to yield anything out of the ordinary. After a thorough investigation, they headed back toward the entrance.

Being back in that room had brought back memories. A quick glance at Sango told him she was struggling with her own emotions, though he could not imagine what might be going through her mind. She claimed not to remember what had happened, but he could not believe that she truly remembered _nothing_. They had been carefully avoiding the subject ever since it happened. He had been tempted to ask on more than one occasion, but did not want to disturb Sango by bringing it up again when she was not yet ready to talk about it.

He might be content to let her think things over and discuss them when she was ready, but he did not like to see her suffering because of it.

"Is something the matter, Sango?"

"You've been acting so strange lately," she admitted with a sigh. "It's… confusing."

"Strange?"

She nodded. "When you… rescued me… you were so considerate," she paused a moment before adding, "I would even say 'honorable,' or at least as honorable as you can be. You didn't even grab me once, at least not that I remember. But then as soon as we left the village you started behaving exactly as you always have. Which I suppose makes sense, but now you've gone back to being honorable, and…" She trailed off, suddenly self-conscious.

He let out a soft sound that might have been a laugh or a sigh – even he was not quite sure which. "It's easy to fall back into bad habits," he admitted. "And I was hoping to put you at ease."

"You wanted to put me at ease," she repeated, frowning a bit.

"I wanted to make it clear that you had done nothing to dishonor yourself," he continued. "And that my intentions toward you have not changed."

She glared at him, her frown deepening. "And just what are your intentions, monk?"

He realized then that he had said more than he had originally planned to tell her. It was a foolish mistake, and left him in an awkward position. "Sango, you know you're a special woman to me –"

"Yes, and when we're done with Naraku, I'm to bear your children," she quipped sourly.

"And none of that has changed –" he began, only to stop as she added, "But where does that leave us now?"

He wanted to touch her, and silently cursed that his hands were full and he could do nothing. He wanted to do something, anything to let her know that he was there for her, without his having to say so.

"Well, I suppose we can try to find out what is causing the nightmares, and carry on from there," he suggested, finally, when it was obvious that she was not going to say anything.

Sango sighed.

After a long silence, during which Miroku did his best impression of not staring at her, she decided, "There's nothing down here. Let's go back up. Maybe we can find something by searching above the trees with Kirara."

As they walked back toward the entrance of the demon's lair, Miroku caught himself very nearly slipping back into his old habits. He had been walking behind her for most of their explorations, simply in deference to her knowledge and skills as a demon slayer, but was suddenly struck by the desire to rub his hand along the lovely curve of her buttocks. He smirked, and with some difficulty managed to curb the urge; he even managed a serene expression when Sango glanced at him over her shoulder.

She looked tense.

He wondered what she was thinking about, though he rather hoped it had something to do with him, or at least their earlier conversation.

She stopped walking so suddenly that he very nearly ran into her.

"Sango…"

"Before we leave, I… I need to ask you something," she murmured. If he had not been standing so very close to her, he probably would not have heard.

He did not pull away, and struggled to find an answer through the hazy distraction of her closeness. _Anything_. More than one word, more like his ordinary behavior… Thankful that she was not looking at him and could not see his internal struggle, he managed, "You may ask me anything, Sango."

She turned to face him, and he did step away from her then. He needed distance between them if he wanted to actually be able to give her an answer to her question. He knew it was his imagination, but she almost looked disappointed that he had moved.

It took her a moment to work up the courage to actually ask, despite his willingness to answer.

"What did I do… back there? When I was under the demon's spell…"

"You really don't remember?"

She shook her head. "I've been having… dreams. But I can't tell what's a dream and what's a memory…"

He was not sure what to tell her. He did not think he knew that much more than she did - she had come around pretty quickly once he found her. But she obviously wanted him to reassure her.

For a brief moment he considered joking about it, before realizing that doing so would only upset her more. "Sango," he began earnestly, "You have done nothing dishonorable. I do not know what happened after you were taken, but I can tell you that nothing untoward occurred after I found you."

Her face reddened even as she scowled. "I woke up alone with you, in a cave, with no clothes on. And 'nothing untoward' happened? Then why can't I remember?"

He knew she did not expect him to answer, but sought to defend himself anyway. "Not for lack of trying," he murmured. Her look shifted from anger to confusion, but at least she appeared willing to listen to him, for once. "The thing thought to distract me," he continued, hoping for the best, "with your beauty. That is why you had no clothes, but I knew by your actions that it was not you in control of your body." He paused. "I would rather die than take advantage of you like that, Sango."

"I – Why?" She struggled to find the right words, as Miroku gave up trying to resist. She looked so sad. He couldn't just do nothing; even if all he could do amounted to very little, it was something. He glanced toward the entrance of the tunnel and, deciding they were close enough that it did not matter, tossed the torch aside.

Sango had enough time to get out, "What are you –" before lapsing into stunned silence as he pulled her into a one-armed embrace. He expected a slap, expected outrage; he considered himself unbelievably lucky that she had allowed him to hold her the previous night, but had by no means expected that luck to continue. But when she did not react violently, and instead leaned into the embrace, he found himself relaxing. It felt so natural to hold her…

But he still had to consciously focus on not letting his hand slip lower to rub her bottom. He almost dared to think that she might have allowed such a transgression.

He grinned, wishing wryly that she had been more open to physical contact in the past. He had continued flirting out of habit and frustration, and she had shied away, unwilling to trust him… both of them continuing the endless cycle of a very foolish game. But now, when it was just the two of them and they'd both stopped fighting, he realized that he truly wanted Sango, all of her - her happiness and sorrow... and no other would do.

It was... surprising, to suddenly know it so clearly. He had always denied it before, for one reason or another, but found he no longer wanted to deny it, at least not right now. He wanted to hold her forever, but let her go when she pulled away.

She turned to Kirara, rubbing the cat's head with both hands. She murmured something that he did not catch, then spoke more loudly. "Come on, Kirara, let's go up and have a look." She slipped onto Kirara's back, then turned to look at Miroku. "Are you coming?"

 

After a quick stop at the inn to retrieve Hiraikotsu and supplies for a short outing, Miroku, Sango, and Kirara headed out over the forest. Much of the land nearby was covered with thick vegetation that made it difficult to see what might be on the ground. Sango seemed fairly certain that what they were looking for would stand out amidst the more ordinary trees, and Miroku saw no reason to disagree with her assessment.

They spent several hours fruitlessly circling the village in an ever-widening circle before giving up to take a break and make something to eat. Somehow most of the day had slipped by while they were occupied with their investigations. The sun was low in the sky now; they would be lucky to make it back to the village before nightfall, but Sango had been reluctant to stop the search, presumably because it meant she would have to talk to Miroku.

He could tell she was still a bit flustered from their trip back into the demon's lair; not that he blamed her. He did not like the place, either. But right now he did not really care whether they talked or not. He was tired and hungry and just wanted to stop flying for a while.

He smiled when, as if reading his thoughts, Sango's stomach rumbled loudly. She turned back to face him with a sheepish look and said, "We should probably take a break, huh?"

He nodded enthusiastically in response.

When she finally spotted a suitable clearing, marked by the sound of water nearby, Sango directed Kirara to the ground.

He knew she was avoiding the inevitable, so he opted to let her have some space. They were not on a pleasure trip, though he would have enjoyed it a great deal more if they were. Nonetheless he was grateful to finally get a respite from the endless searching.

He watched with interest as Sango stretched, working the kinks out of her muscles after riding for so long, but looked away and busied himself with building a fire before she caught him staring.

"I haven't sensed anything out of the ordinary all afternoon," he said as he worked. The silence was bothering him, for some reason. He hoped that a mundane discussion would not bother her too much.

"And there's nothing visibly weird going on, at least around here," she agreed, coming to sit near him. She had already stashed Hiraikotsu nearby, from the sound of it, and he heard Kirara purr as she leaped into her mistress' lap.

The fire took hold, makeshift though it was, and Sango drew two cups of instant food from her pack, along with a small pot for boiling water. They had limited supplies of the special food, thanks to Kagome, but using them was easier than looking for food in unfamiliar forest, especially when they had other things to worry about.

Miroku guessed that it was his job to get the water, and did so without question.

When he returned, he noticed that Sango's expression was darker than usual. "Is something wrong?"

"Hmm?" She looked up, and he realized that she had simply been lost in thought. "No, I was just thinking…"

"What about?" he prodded, half expecting some sort of angry rebuttal.

"I don't understand. There has to be a reason…"

He frowned. "A reason for what?"

This time she did glare at him. "There's nothing here. But if we killed the demon then why are we both still being affected by… something? There has to be a reason that the nightmares stopped when we came back here."

"I must admit, I thought it would be a more straightforward endeavor."

She looked away and sighed. "We should have just waited for Inuyasha and Kagome to return, or at least asked Inuyasha to help us. I'm sure his nose could pick something up."

"Perhaps," he agreed. "Maybe we'll find something tomorrow."

"We need a plan," she protested, glumly. "We can't just go out at random and expect to find anything."

"True enough. What does the demon slayer have to say about it?"

She looked a little discomfited by his deference to her position as a slayer, but managed, "It was a plant demon. I've been thinking that perhaps it could be linked to another demon or another location by its root system. Maybe if we follow the direction the roots led underground, we'll find something."

"It's a start. And if that doesn't work, we can always resort to searching 'at random,'" he mused.

"We don't have that kind of time," she pointed out. "We would have to leave tonight - and fly nonstop - to get back to Kaede's village before Inuyasha and Kagome."

The water was beginning to boil, so he poured some into each of the ramen cups. "Well you left word with Kaede that we had gone to your village, right?"

"I, well…"

"They will wait for us to return."

"I hope you're right."

He rather thought she did not have to look so forlorn about such a little lie, but kept his mouth shut while their noodles cooked.

They ate in silence, neither willing to push the other just yet, but when the food was gone and the fire burned down, someone had to make a decision.

Sango rubbed Kirara's ears, smiling as the cat writhed and purred with delight. "It's getting dark. Let's go back to the village. We'll head out again in the morning."

Miroku nodded his agreement with the plan, and soon they were airborne again.

It was well after dark by the time they made it back to the inn, and the village was mostly silent around them. Miroku waited patiently outside the room they were to share while Sango changed out of her armor and into her yukata for the evening.

When she finally let him in, he couldn't resist teasing her a little. She had taken a spot near the wall, sitting with her knees hugged to her chest. He couldn't just let her look that sad.

"Sango," he began, playfully, as he sat down next to her, "I answered your question today. Perhaps you could return the favor."

"I suppose." Her voice was guarded, but not forbidding.

Figuring he had nothing to lose, and that the answer was probably of little consequence, he asked anyway. "You said something to Kirara earlier. What was it?"

"I - you didn't grab my bottom," she admitted, blushing furiously. "When you hugged me."

He tiled his head slightly to one side. "Is that a problem?"

"Well, no. You said you had been trying to put me at ease by acting the way you always have… and, well, it's confusing. I told Kirara that I wonder if you're feeling well -"

"Ah, dear Sango, if it will make you feel better," he teased, inching toward her, "Then I will be happy to oblige."

She scooted away from him and out of reach, her blush deepening. "No, that's all right. I - I like it better when you're being sweet, not perverted."

_Do you, now?_ He tried his best to look thoughtful, instead of smug or perverted. "Something to think about, I suppose." He leaned back and closed his eyes, but could not quite manage to keep the satisfied smirk from his face. _So you noticed, after all._

 

Kagome felt good when she left the school building. The whole day had been a blessed reprieve from the tension she had felt lately. Everything was almost… normal. It felt like she had to have passed the test, after all that studying and worry. She had even managed to escape Hojo and her other friends. As she walked home from class, she let the sense of peace and tranquility wash over her with a happy sigh.

Life was definitely better when she wasn't fighting with Inuyasha, and didn't have any more tests to study for, for a while anyway. She wondered what Inuyasha had been up to all day and cringed. He had been driving her whole family nuts waiting for her to finish studying and get the test over with; she hoped he had been better behaved today.

She was looking forward to spending some time with him - and her family - today, and hoped he had not done anything to ruin it.

But when she climbed the stairs to reach the shrine, everything looked peaceful.

She was smiling when she slid open the door to the house, took her shoes off, and bounded into the kitchen. A very pleasant smell was emanating from the room, and she was almost positive that she knew what it was: ramen, for Inuyasha.

The hanyou was sitting at the family table, happily slurping away at the noodles, while her mother cleaned up the dishes. "Hi mom, Inuyasha," she greeted.

But when she turned around to greet her daughter in return, her mother's expression was very serious. "Kagome, we need to talk."


	11. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Sango had too much on her mind to be able to sleep. When she heard the monk's breathing even out, she decided that it was safe and rolled over to look at him. He looked so calm and steady, peaceful even, while she… she felt ragged and raw inside, and anything but calm.

Just when she thought she had him figured out, he went and did something else to put her on edge. No matter what she tried to think about, her mind kept drifting back to the demon's lair; but this time there were no bad memories, just the memory of Miroku's arms around her, and a strangely welcome sense of security and warmth. _What on earth was he thinking?_

Sure, Miroku liked to touch her. She had known that almost from the moment she met him. But in the past there had always been dubious intent accompanying his touches, grabs and feels that were not limited to her, but spread amongst nearly every female he encountered. Even his speech had been tainted by lechery.

Despite many of his more noble, though oft-hidden, attributes, it was difficult to get past the façade, and even more difficult to truly trust him. She could trust her life to him, in battle, but her heart?

No, not when she _knew_… knew that he would certainly break her heart. It had always seemed like a sure thing, even when she agreed to marry him, that he would have eyes for other women, that he couldn't keep his hands to himself, even if he wanted to. It was part and parcel of who he was. Or so she had thought.

But lately something had changed, and those things no longer seemed so certain.

She felt he was simply trying to comfort her, in his own way, rather than take advantage of her. And it had been days since he had made a grab for her bottom. And even then…

He had said that he was trying to change, and had lapsed back into his old habits in an effort to make her feel more comfortable. But he had always been such a pervert that it was hard to believe that he would want to change his ways, much less be able to do so. Still, she did not like their old routine at all, and… she wanted to believe him. She wanted desperately to believe that, so simply, all of the difficulties that had arisen in her life because of him could vanish as quickly as they had appeared.

But she had to remind herself: he was a clever man, and never did anything without a purpose. This seemed altogether too easy.

She hesitated to even think it, squinting at him in the dark, as if it might somehow make things clear. Maybe he really _was _trying to change.

She rolled onto her back and stared up into the darkness. A long time later, she sighed. _I'm never going to figure him out!_

 

A soft morning breeze teased through her hair, and Kagome let out a happy sigh. It felt good to return to the feudal era with Inuyasha, and she was looking forward to heading out on the road again.

Her last few days in the modern era had been relatively worry-free, and she had been glad to spend some time with Inuyasha away from their quest, even if he did tend to get into a lot of trouble in her world.

She'd had an awkward conversation with her mother, at the older woman's behest, concerning her intentions toward Inuyasha. She had been horrified to discover that it was a discussion about _dating _Inuyasha, and found herself wondering just how much her mother was aware of.

"We need to talk" was almost universally bad, but she had not expected to end up in a discussion of relationships and _birth control _with her mother. She was pretty sure it was impossible to be more embarrassed than she had been on that day. At the very least, she counted herself lucky that Inuyasha did not appear to have overheard any of their conversation; her mother had thought ahead and distracted him with plenty of ramen. She might have died of embarrassment if he had.

But while the conversation had been upsetting, it had also been something of a relief to know that her family did not disapprove of her feelings for Inuyasha.

She was not quite sure what to think of their willingness to accept the hanyou as a part of the family, specifically as her boyfriend, but she was glad of their support. Just returning to the feudal era beside him was enough to make her smile.

Everything looked peaceful, and she fully expected Inuyasha to start grouching about getting back on the road as soon as they got to the village. They'd meet up with Miroku, Sango, and Shippo, and they'd be on their way before lunch. She was looking forward to it.

Her high spirits were dashed when they arrived at Kaede's hut, and were greeted outside by Shippo and Kaede… Shippo careened into Kagome's arms, and teased Inuyasha about having to carry Kagome's large backpack… but something seemed wrong, somehow.

Kagome frowned. "Where are Miroku and Sango?"

"They left," Shippo grumbled. "Sango said she wanted to travel back to her village."

Kaede nodded, adding, "I do believe she was lying."

"Lying?" Kagome wondered aloud. Sango was a terrible liar, and seemed to know it. Why would she have lied to Kaede about returning to her village, and then… "So she went off with Miroku?"

"Yes. I've never seen her so worked up before."

"But why would she be lying? What happened while we were gone?" Kagome blushed a little, thinking back to her own mortification over the past couple of days – and the box of condoms buried at the bottom of her backpack, that her mother had insisted she take back to the feudal era with her. Would Miroku and Sango really have run off together? And if so, why? Certainly not for the reasons she was thinking… right?

Kaede looked thoughtful. "They departed on the same day as you and Inuyasha."

"If they'd gone to the slayer village, wouldn't they be back by now?" Kagome asked, looking up to meet Inuyasha's gaze. She could see her own worry reflected there.

She wanted to believe what Sango had told Kaede, but things weren't adding up. "Do you think we…"

"Keh." Inuyasha turned away. "Let's get going."

"Going?"

"To the slayer village." Shippo had already scurried up onto the hanyou's shoulders, and it was obvious they were only waiting for her. "Something must've happened to 'em, if they're this late."

Kagome nodded. "Right," she murmured, taking her customary place on Inuyasha's back, though with the addition of Shippo and her backpack it was more cramped than usual.

As they sped down the path that would lead them to the slayers' village, she hoped that the feeling of worry that settled deep in the pit of her stomach was for nothing.

 

Morning brought the monk and slayer no closer to an answer, and with each day that passed Sango's temper grew shorter. And when the seventh day after Kagome's departure came, Sango found herself moping by the remnants of the night's fire long after they should have set out. Miroku said nothing, seemingly content to let her brood; she felt awful about having lied to Kaede about where they were going, and found herself wishing, with surprising ill-temper, that she had just told the truth.

She had known all along that Miroku was a bad influence on her, and realized just how far gone her sense of reason was, that she had actually listened to him when he told her to lie. This was supposed to have been an easy trip, a quick investigation. At least, that was what she had assumed.

But it seemed that nothing could ever be easy, or straightforward.

They had left the village early the previous morning, heading out past the demon's lair, and camped out in the forest when night fell. She wondered forlornly if traveling further afield would yield any leads, or if it were all pointless, and the nightmares that had led them back here had been mere coincidence.

She knew that Miroku was trying to help, because he wished to assist her and for reasons of his own, but his presence was doing nothing to ease her nerves or to help her focus.

The reality was quite the opposite.

She knew what she needed to focus on, and every moment spent in his company was pushing her farther and farther away from that goal. Instead, she had been spending her time second-guessing every offhand comment, every incidental touch or glance, and not paying nearly enough attention to what was going on around her.

She frowned, but did not realize it until Miroku crouched beside her and pointed it out.

"Now, Sango, there's no need for such a sad expression," he teased.

She had not realized that he was so close, and started in surprise when he spoke. "I… er…" She struggled to find coherent words, even as she found his presence more flustering than usual.

There were many things she needed to say to him, but she did not know how.

Miroku sat next to her with a slight huff, and turned his gaze to the sky; far above them, blue peeked through the leaves of the trees that grew so densely all around. "It's getting late. We should head out."

Sango nodded even as hopelessness clawed at her soul.

 

They searched for two more days without luck and as the second day drew to a close, Sango felt as if worry and shame were going to devour her whole. Even if Kaede and the others had believed her lie, they would discover her deception soon, if they had not already.

Miroku interrupted her thoughts when he noticed her expression turning melancholy or sour, but the sound of his voice did little to settle her mood. She guided Kirara up above the trees, the two of them scouting all around from their vantage point on her back as they rose higher and higher above the forest. Sango's eyes scanned the tree covered countryside, but her mind was elsewhere, playing and re-playing events of days past.

The way Miroku had held her so gently in the demon's lair…

The strange sense of calm and acceptance that had followed…

She had been happy. Confused, but pleased. It had felt like they might be making progress in the right direction, and that at last she would be able to settle her feelings for him and focus on their quest.

But then, the next morning…

He had… apologized.

And she… she had let him.

He had finally done what she had desired for so long - he'd touched her without groping, without letting his hands stray, without making a perverted comment - and she had let him _apologize _for it.

It seemed she could no longer go a day without making some terrible mistake.

Sango hung her head.

"There!"

She turned to look in the direction Miroku was pointing. Far away, so much so that she could barely see it, was a massive dead tree, surrounded by a wide clearing so that it almost stood alone. Sango frowned.

"That looks suspicious," Miroku added.

"It does. Do you think we should -" She trailed off, uncertainly.

"Yes, Sango?"

She glanced toward the horizon, where the sun was slowly setting. "It's getting late. I think we should make camp, and check out that tree first thing in the morning." As Miroku shifted to follow her gaze, she turned to look back at the dead tree.

It was probably nothing - it had to be nothing, nothing more than her imagination, at least - but something about that tree kept drawing her attention. She hadn't even noticed it until Miroku pointed it out, but now she couldn't seem to get it out of her head.

"It's not a bad plan," Miroku was saying, though she barely heard him. "Best not to be out in unfamiliar territory in the dark."

Kirara seemed to sense her mistress' preoccupation, and headed back in the direction they had come from, seeking the stream they had camped beside for the previous two nights. By the time they found a promising clearing, Sango had managed to clear her head a bit, and she was able to help Miroku with the fire and their dinner without feeling too out of sorts.

Still, something bothered her, even as they eased from small talk into almost-comfortable silence. It was an uncomfortable feeling that made her blood burn and tightened her chest.

That tree was calling her.

She stared into the small fire and knew that this tree, and whatever it was that was drawing her to it, would only bring trouble.

And the chill she felt, deep in her bones, made her certain that she did not want Miroku to get involved in this. She glanced at the monk surreptitiously and felt a twinge of guilt.

How could she tell him that she needed to go alone?

 

It had been quiet for so long that Miroku had decided to make the most of the opportunity and had actually slipped into a light meditation. He heard Sango and Kirara move off into the trees, presumably so Sango could change into clothing more comfortable for sleeping without fear of being spied on.

He sighed, and wondered if the day would ever come that she did not find his appreciation to be repulsive. And yet, even as he wondered that, he had to fight the urge to go and do exactly what she thought – and feared - he would do. He felt vaguely as if he could not win, no matter what he tried. While he had done nothing, lately, to earn her distrust, she was still skittish around him.

For some reason he had thought that a marriage proposal would solve that problem; after that failed he'd tried - with little success to date - to play it her way, and try his best not to touch her or otherwise bother her. She'd finally given him some hope that his attempts were not entirely unwanted, and then he'd gone and apologized for it anyway.

Somewhere along the line, he'd lost his nerve. He'd become utterly afraid of pushing her away, of losing her…

"I… I can't accept your help in this."

Miroku looked up, startled at the sudden outburst after nearly an hour of silence, and frowned. He had not heard Sango return, and had no idea where this vehemence had come from. "Why not? I have merely been following you."

"Because… this is something I have to do on my own. I –"

"Would you have allowed your fellow demon slayers to assist you?"

She looked away. "You are not a demon slayer," she answered finally. Miroku sighed. He knew what she meant. It was a matter of honor for her, and she did not want to rely on another person in her quest for vengeance. Still…

"That has never been a hindrance to us in the past," he pointed out. In fact, he had often - but secretly - marveled at their teamwork, despite their vastly different fighting styles and training.

"I know…"

"Then why is it a problem now?"

"This… there's something strange at work here." Sango seemed worried, and struggled to find the right words. "I… This place is giving me a bad feeling. I don't want to… I can't put you in danger again."

Even as Miroku's temper flared, he had to force himself not to laugh. She wanted to leave him behind while she went into battle, to keep him safe. How many times had he done just that to her, and thought nothing of it? And he had no doubt that, given the chance, he would continue to put himself in harm's way to spare her. He could not exactly fault her for feeling the same, although he would have liked to.

"I understand the sentiment, Sango," he said, doing his best to sound placating, "But I think it would be best if we stuck together."

"I couldn't bear it if I put you in danger again, and you suffered because of me."

He chuckled. "Ah, so you see my predicament." When she frowned questioningly, he continued, "I convinced you to return and investigate, if you remember."

She looked angry, though he could not say if she was more upset with him - or herself. After a tense moment, she calmed, and her expression shifted from anger to melancholy. "It feels like this was inevitable… But we still haven't found anything definite."

"We'll find it. Together," Miroku said, trying his best to maintain his patience. "We just have to keep looking. I'm certain we're getting closer to the answer. That dead tree – it's enormous. It has to have something to do with this."

Sango glared, ignoring what he had said. "Inuyasha and Kagome will be on our trail soon, if they aren't already."

Miroku shrugged noncommittally. There was not a whole lot he could do about their companions at this point. "I do not see why you are so upset about this."

"I _lied _to Kaede about where we were going. I've been lying to Kagome all along. Don't you see that this is a problem?" As if suddenly realizing who she was talking to, she added, "Never mind. You wouldn't understand."

Miroku frowned, his tenuous grip on patience and understanding snapped. He tried to keep the anger from his voice, but the look on her face told him she knew she'd gone too far. "You can't keep pushing everyone away, Sango. We just want to help you. _I _just want to help you."

She had nothing to say in response to that. Regret washed over her and stilled her to silence.

"I didn't come all this way to see you fall."

"I know that," she said finally, her voice quiet. "A-and I'm sorry."

Miroku resettled himself, shifting to lean more comfortably against the tree behind him. He tipped his head back, letting his eyes close. "I can't even begin to imagine what you've been feeling about all this, Sango."

"I've been such a burden lately," she sighed. She moved, coming to sit next to him, sitting easily within reach. He had to wonder if she'd done that deliberately. "I made you come with me all this way…"

He smirked. Could she have forgotten already that he was the one that had talked her into coming back? His expression sobered when he realized that this was Sango and yes, she had probably managed to convince herself that the whole mess was her fault. "You didn't make me do anything. I followed because I want to help in any way that I can."

"But –"

He inched ever so slightly closer to her. She still wasn't looking at him, and seemed to be ignoring the fact that she had only returned after he persuaded her to do so. Kirara mewed, appearing out of nowhere to sprawl across Sango's lap. Teasingly, he said, "You shouldn't blame yourself for the loyalty of your friends."

"It's just… this is all my fault. If I'd been paying more attention –"

Even in her fit of melancholy and self-doubt, she looked beautiful in the firelight. Miroku struggled to focus, and had to consciously keep his hand from inching toward her. "Sango, it is not your fault. That demon could have chosen any one of us as its prey, and the result would have been the same."

"I've let you all down."

He smiled, genuinely this time, and reached over to gently squeeze her hand. She even smiled a little at the reassurance; he wondered absently if he would find himself apologizing for this, too. "The only way you could let us down is if you stopped fighting."

Sango's grip tightened on his hand, squeezing back for a moment before she slipped away. "We'll go together, then, first thing in the morning."

It was not quite a question.

Miroku nodded, and it seemed the matter was settled.

As the night deepened, Sango bedded down against Kirara, who transformed into her larger form to serve as both a pillow and a source of warmth against the chill. Miroku took up a spot near a tree not far away. The camp was peaceful as they prepared themselves for the day ahead.

And much, much later, when the monk finally slept, the slayer crept out of camp and into the dark.


	12. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

"Are you sure?" Kagome asked, her voice wavering uncertainly.

"How many times do I have to tell you? If they'd been here any time recently, I'd smell it."

Poking her head into another one of the ruined huts, Kagome had to sigh. "There's no sign of them here, either. I think you're right… but if they didn't come here, where _did_ they go?"

"Hell if I know," Inuyasha responded, scowling and folding his arms over his chest. "And I told you I didn't smell anything, so whaddaya gotta keep looking around for?"

"Just double-checking. I wouldn't want to miss a clue…"

"Feh."

Kagome paced, conscious of the tension in the fox kit riding on her shoulder. She poked at a nearby rock with her foot and frowned. "It's unlike Sango to lie like that," she said, finally, just to break the silence.

"Unless she was tryin' to hide something," Inuyasha agreed. Sango was a terrible liar, and they had only ever seen her do so before when the stakes were high. In the past, it had been Naraku using her brother's life against her, to force her to betray her friends, but they had not seen so much as a sign of Naraku in quite some time. So what could it be?

"I didn't notice that she was acting strangely, though," Kagome commented after a few moments. "She was upset, but..."

Inuyasha scowled. "Maybe she wasn't, but the monk sure was."

"Do you think he convinced her to cover for him?"

"Sango would never let him get away with something like that," Shippo protested. "I wish they hadn't gone when I was sleeping… I shoulda known to keep an eye on them like Inuyasha does."

Kagome smiled gently. "It's not your fault, Shippo. If you'd gone with them, then we wouldn't know where _you_ were, either."

"We'll find 'em," Inuyasha grumbled. "Don't give up so easy. I'll track them all the way across Japan if I have to."

"We don't have any leads, Inuyasha," Kagome said, her voice sounding unusually forlorn. She felt strangely lonely with Sango gone. It was one thing to know that the slayer had returned to her village for a short time, or gone off on her own for a small trip, but for her to vanish with no sign of returning? It was small comfort to know that, wherever she was, Miroku was with her.

And what if she'd simply missed some sign that something was wrong? She realized with a pang of guilt that she had been very wrapped up in her own difficulties with Inuyasha lately, and might not have noticed if something was bothering Sango.

"So what's it gonna be?"

Kagome perked up at the sound of Inuyasha's voice. She had obviously missed something. "Huh?"

"We've still got a while before dark, if you wanna keep going," he explained, his voice strangely gentle for someone that was normally so impatient.

"Where do you think we should start looking?" She paused. "Do you think they want us to go after them?"

"We'll find 'em, whether they like it or not." Under his breath, he added, "Those two idiots."

Shippo scuttled down off her shoulder and into her arms; she squeezed him against her chest. "You moron," he spat, fierce with the knowledge that he was safe from harm so long as he stuck with Kagome. "We don't even know where they went."

"Maybe not, but I've got a funny feeling that we'll find 'em if we go back to where all the trouble started," Inuyasha grumbled, surprisingly failing to take Shippo's bait.

Kagome blinked. "Back to that last village? Where the demon kidnapped Sango?"

Inuyasha nodded. "It was right about then that the monk started acting weird." He paused for a beat. "Weirder than normal."

_It's still bothering him that he wasn't able to find anything after Sango and Miroku killed the demon… But what if he's right? What if there was more to it than they told us?_

"I suppose we could look there… It's a start, at least," Kagome tentatively agreed.

"Then let's go. We can get a head start tonight. No point in wasting time here."

Kagome nodded and climbed onto his back. As they headed off into the forest, trusting Inuyasha's nose and sense of direction to lead them, she couldn't help but notice that he held her a little tighter, a little closer than normal. She snuggled against him and tried not to let her lingering sense of guilt consume her.

But when they stopped to make camp for the night, she found herself just as preoccupied as she had felt when they set out. She found herself sitting apart from the others for a long time, almost since Shippo fell asleep, hoping for a little space so she could think.

"Kagome."

"Yes, Inuyasha?"

"Stop blaming yourself."

She blinked in surprise. She hadn't really expected Inuyasha to notice, much less to know what she was thinking about.

"I'm not blaming myself," she insisted.

"Keh, you think I can't tell?" He settled himself beside her, though his expression was still a bit standoffish. "Anytime anything goes wrong, you get all gloomy and blame yourself until it gets fixed." He frowned. "Even though I'm the one that has to do the fixing."

Kagome smiled slightly, and sighed. "Thanks, Inuyasha." She leaned gently against him, letting her head rest against his shoulder, and ignoring his insistence that he had done nothing.

He might be grumpy and rude and a million other things, but he could make her smile when no one else could, and just by being himself. Because when he said he'd make things right… She believed him.

 

It was difficult for Sango to navigate the unfamiliar forest in the dark, even with Kirara to guide her. She had barely taken the time to change into her armor along the way, and had been walking ever since, and always in the same direction. The area might have been unfamiliar, but she knew she had not become turned around or lost. It was almost as if the path, or at least the sense of _way_, had been burned into her brain.

She wasn't sure how many stray roots she'd tripped over, or how much farther she had to go to find that tree, but she knew she needed to do it soon. It had to be close by now; it felt like she had been walking for hours. Maybe she had. She could not see the sky through the trees to get a sense of what time it might be.

_I'm just checking it out. I'll be back at camp before morning, and Miroku will never know I left._ She kept repeating the thoughts to herself, even long after she had realized they were lies; Miroku slept lightly, and might even have discovered her absence already. She looked back over her shoulder for a moment, but in spite of her trepidation she could not seem to stop walking.

Suddenly, the forest opened up into an enormous clearing, and an equally large tree loomed before her. They'd made it.

Kirara growled softly.

Sango slowed, and then stopped walking altogether. It felt almost as if she had suddenly regained control of her body. Frowning, she adjusted her grip on Hiraikotsu.

Something had brought her here, she was sure of it. What she did not know was why or how, but she intended to find out.

"Come on, Kirara," she urged, taking a step forward. "Let's check this thing out and get back to camp." _Before Miroku notices that we're gone_, she thought guiltily. He'd be furious if he discovered that she had gone without him. Kirara made a skeptical sound, but stuck close to Sango regardless.

The place gave off a definite dark aura; it was enough to make her shudder. She had to wonder how she had managed to miss it during her aerial exploration with Miroku earlier in the day, because now the darkness seemed oppressive, almost painful. Everything else seemed to pale in comparison. And yet there was no apparent cause for her feelings of dread.

A quick search of the perimeter of the clearing revealed nothing out of the ordinary, though Sango found herself startling at the slightest rustle of grass, or the sound of the wind whispering through the trees. She knew it was the dark aura, and her lack of familiarity with the area, that was getting to her, but she couldn't help feeling jumpy.

She slowly worked her way closer to the tree. It was huge, towering over the rest of the forest, and dwarfing everything in the clearing. Sango felt a pang of sadness to see that it was dying, if it was not dead already. It was obviously very old, and had been growing in this place for many years. Only a few leaves, which might have been alive or dead for all she could tell in the poor light, clung to the lower branches, but most were bare.

An enormous vine wound its way around the trunk of the tree and disappeared amidst the upper branches, almost as if it were choking the life out of the larger plant.

_I felt so drawn to this place, but there's _nothing_ here…_

Sango frowned. She was close enough to reach out and run a hand along the tree trunk if she wanted, and she still could not find anything that seemed out of the ordinary - except, of course, that sense of overwhelming darkness that permeated the area.

"Another demon?" she asked aloud. Even though Kirara could not answer her, it felt better to speak. Nothing stirred but the wind.

"It's nothing," she grumbled. "Let's go, Kirara."

She only made it a few steps before the ground opened up nearby - a covered entrance to some hole in the ground, frustratingly familiar though she could not place why - and tentacle-like vines burst out, twisting and writhing through the air. For a brief moment they waved almost comically in the air, and then, as one, they shot toward her.

Turning, she leapt onto Kirara's back, and in an instant they were airborne. Kirara was quick, but not quick enough.

The tendrils came after them faster than they could fly, grasping at Sango's arms and legs, pulling with terrible force until she lost her grip on Kirara. She cried out at the feel of the things sliding along her arms, up her thighs, squeezing ever harder. But as she fell through the air, she noticed, almost in daze, that the things weren't going after Kirara… She clung to that moment of clarity, shouting to her companion.

"Kirara! Get Miroku!"

The cat demon obeyed her command, despite a worried backward glance, and fled into the night. Sango did not have a chance to track her progress, making sure that she made it into the trees, before she hit the ground, hard. For a moment flashes of light not unlike stars danced before her eyes, and then everything went dark.

 

Miroku didn't realize he had been sleeping until Kirara burst into camp, flaming and snarling in fury, and startled him awake. It was still dark and… He frowned.

Sango was gone.

Kirara returning alone, full force, could only mean one thing.

He stood, struggling for calm against fear and rage. Rage - at Sango for being so damnably foolhardy and honorable, and at whatever it was she'd found that had managed to catch her in its trap.

Kirara watched with impassive, surprisingly gentle eyes.

Swearing, Miroku lashed out. He might have been reaching for his staff, propped nearby as always when he meditated or slept, but instead he slammed his fist against the tree - and immediately regretted letting his anger get the better of him. Pain reverberated up his arm, stung where the beads dug against his flesh. He sighed. Self-injury would do him - and Sango - no good at all.

With a forced sense of resignation – find her now, make sure she was safe, and there would be time to be angry with her later – he turned to the cat demon. "Kirara, take me to her."

He was on her back the moment she turned in invitation, and then they were running, running through the forest so quickly that they might have been flying. He closed his eyes and clung to the thick fur along her shoulders, and pretended that he did not know where they were going.

 

It felt like the world was spinning dizzily, out of control.

Sango groaned. She tried to clutch her head in her hands, but her arms wouldn't move. Bound… she was bound.

She'd lost Hiraikotsu somewhere…

She shook her head, hoping to gain a little clarity. She was in some sort of cave or tunnel, and bound with something stiff and wooden, almost like vines. And hanging almost upright, suspended from the ceiling a short distance above her head. She groaned again. Just her luck.

"Awake at last, I see." It was a strange voice, soft and androgynous, that had spoken, and yet it sounded vaguely familiar. Sango couldn't quite turn her head far enough to see who it was that had spoken. "This wouldn't be any fun if you'd slept through it all. Not after the pain you've caused me, slayer bitch."

That voice…

There was the sound of footsteps, and then a beautiful woman sauntered into view.

"You!" Sango twitched, plagued by memories. Struggling for consciousness, memory… lying on something soft, writhing with pain, pleasure… Everything, flowing through her veins… Pain, behind her eyes… _Why can't I remember?_ Feeling, being, in the moment, no past, no future… _Sleep_… And _that voice_ had spoken to her, then. The same person, the same demon. "It was you! But how? That can't be! I _killed you_…"

"Wrong," the demon said, smiling and stepping closer to run a finger along Sango's jawline. Sango frowned, trying to pull her head away from the unwanted caress.

The demon's face twisted into a gnarled smile. "It was not I that you killed. Even a fool such as you can see that I live and stand before you. And as to _how_… You inhaled the smoke from torches made from my branches, and infused with sap from my veins," it creaked. "I can direct your dreams and your actions for as long as the poison remains within your body."

"That's where the nightmares came from," Sango managed, shaking with rage. "You wanted us to come back."

"You killed my daughter," it said, by way of confirmation. "I intend to take your life as compensation."

Daughter? Of course. Her initial guess about radial roots had been correct - the thing just put up offspring wherever it found a suitable location, spreading ever outward from the central hub: this place. What she had killed before was not the true demon, merely its offshoot. There could be dozens or even hundreds of other "daughter" demons... and they probably all fed back into this main demon, providing it with energy stolen from hapless travelers. Just as it probably intended to feed on her, and then Miroku and the others.

Sango mustered up courage - and demon slayer's pride - from somewhere deep inside. "Just try. I'll kill you first. I won't let you take advantage of any more innocent people."

It laughed at her then. "You cannot even move, slayer… How can one as weak as you hope to defeat me?"

She did not answer, preferring to let the thing underestimate her. Instead, she focused on figuring out what she _could_ move, for the binding vines did not hold her completely immobile. She could still move her head and her fingers. Sango smiled, and tripped the triggers that released the blades that were hidden beneath her armor.

The blades sang as they came free, slicing easily through the vines that bound her. And with her arms free, she made short work of the vines around her legs and ankles. The demon looked impassive.

"Do you seek to impress me with the strength of your human weapons, slayer?"

"I'll do better than that," Sango said, glowering. "I'll kill you with them."

She drew her sword, knowing that the blade was most likely useless against this creature, and moved into a defensive stance. She glanced around quickly, trying to determine the best course of action. Her best chance was to find Hiraikotsu and get out of this hole, but there was no sign of her weapon, and no easy way out. She realized that she had panicked, and sent Kirara away when the cat demon might have been her next best chance at getting out of this alive. A thought struck her, chilling her to the bone. She had sent Kirara for Miroku. To bring him back to this place.

_Did I play right into its hands… again?_

Sending Kirara to fetch Miroku, rather than to get him out of harm's way, might have been sentencing them both to death. It was just one more mistake on an ever-growing list. Sango fought off despair and struggled to focus on the task at hand. Miroku could take care of himself. She needed to do the same.

"It will be a pleasure to slay you," the demon said, its voice shifting between sweetly androgynous and creakily growling. It was moving nearby, but in the darkness she could not make out what it was doing.

Suddenly its arms extended into long vines, shooting straight toward her. Sango dodged out of the way, barely, and kept running, using her sword to help keep the vines at bay.

She skidded to a halt - there was a solid wall in front of her. Gazing upward, she saw sky and realized that this was an entrance, if not the same one she had been pulled down earlier. But the walls were sheer. There was no way she could climb out.

She half-turned, but the demon's arms, vines, whatever they really were, were nearly on top of her. She didn't have time to fight back before they were on her. She struggled, twisting and writhing, but one got a grip on her wrist and it was only a matter of time before the rest found a hold.

The first one tightened painfully around her wrist. Something popped from the pressure, and she instinctively released her grip on her weapon. The sword fell to the ground, clanging dully.

And then there were more, and more, and more, wrapping around her, stifling her. Tightening, tightening, until she groaned and toppled over.

She was caught again, and this time the vines were reinforced with the demon's power, roused by its anger… She'd need leverage and space to summon the strength to cut through them with mere metal, and that was not an option. If she had Hiraikotsu, or some way to imbue her blades with holy power like Miroku or Kagome could, she might have had a chance.

She barely had time to take stock of the situation before she was overwhelmed by _pain_. It was strong enough to set her blood ablaze, to arch her back and tighten all of her muscles at once.

Sango cried out in agony, but knew, even as the vines drew tighter and tighter around her, that it would not stop until the very life had been squeezed from her body.

Her breath left her in a sob; shameful tears pricked her eyes. She was a fool to have come here, and to have done so alone, when she knew deep in her heart that she was not strong enough to succeed. She had failed before and knew she would fail again. Had she come here for that purpose alone?

She'd been struggling for so long against overwhelming odds… First avenging the death of her family and her village, saving her brother and making sure her new friends weren't killed, fighting her feelings for Miroku, feelings that shook her beliefs to the very core… and now she had failed utterly in her attempt to regain her lost sense of honor, and was going to die for it. She felt as if she were being torn in half, with one part saying, "I can't do this anymore," and the other insisting that she fight, as her birthright demanded.

But, right now, she couldn't fight even if she wanted to. She was bound so tightly that she could not move, in spite of the fact that the pain had begun to recede. She realized with no little horror that she couldn't even breathe.

Sango went limp. She had gotten so caught up in her feelings of disappointment, dishonor, and failure, that she'd lost all sense of reason and become that which she feared most. She had lost her confidence in herself, in her training as a demon slayer, and had become so desperate to restore her honor – on her own terms – that she had refused help she might otherwise have gladly accepted. And this time she'd dragged Miroku with her and put him in danger as well.

Every attempt she had made to fix things had only made the situation worse, every step of the way.

She was plagued by so many doubts, so many fears and regrets, that she simply wanted everything to stop. Stop, and take away the shame, the foolishness, and all of the dishonor that had plagued her for so long. _Just go away, and let me die._

She knew that she would lose consciousness soon, and that death would follow soon after, and braced herself for the end.

A few seconds later, the vines wrapped around her loosened, then released her completely.

She hit the floor with a dull thud, and stayed where she had fallen, gasping for air.

_Why didn't it just kill me? Why back off _now_?_

She bit back a sound that threatened to be half groan, half sob. But when the vines did not return to strangle her again, she began to wonder if she might be able to move. If she could move, she could fight. And, she realized with some surprise, she did not want to die, after all. She wanted to fight, wanted to live to see the end of her quest, wanted to find out what it was like to spend the rest of her days beside the man she loved… if her body would just cooperate.

With some effort, she was able to push herself upright enough to sit, and weakly cradle her aching head in her hands.

Suddenly, she heard an urgent whisper out of the darkness: "Demon slayer!"


	13. Chapter Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

As soon as they reached the clearing surrounding the enormous tree, Kirara leaped into the air. Miroku hung on for dear life, searching in the dim light for any sign of Sango. There was none.

The clearing looked smaller than he had thought it would. It appeared to be dead and empty, save for the carcass of the tree that rose from its center. But even so, he knew that Kirara would not have brought him here without reason.

Suddenly, he caught sight of something unmistakably familiar lying in the shadows near the base of the tree: Hiraikotsu.

"Kirara, we have to go down there and take a look around. I can't see well enough from up here," he said, speaking loudly to be heard over the wind as they circled the tree yet again.

The suggestion made Kirara angry enough that she twisted her head around to growl at him. He was surprised when she did as he asked, in spite of her obvious objections, and landed beside the tree near where Sango's weapon lay. Even though there was no enemy in sight, he took his cues from Kirara and kept his guard up.

There was no sign of a struggle, or any sort of hint as to what might have happened to Sango aside from the obvious fact that something had taken her. He found himself wishing that Kirara could talk, so she could tell him what she had seen before returning to the campsite to wake him. More than that, he wanted to know why she had abandoned Sango in the first place. Had Sango ordered her to leave? Or had she come of her own accord, hoping to save her mistress?

The wondering made his heart ache with worry and regret. He should have known better, should have realized that she wouldn't give up her plans without a fight like that. He knew she was far too stubborn for her own good. He should have been more watchful... He frowned, and turned a full circle to see if he would notice anything new from ground level.

A rustling sound nearby caught his attention, and as he turned to locate the source he barely had time to leap out of the way before a mass of vines shot out of the ground at his feet. It was Kirara's sudden movement that had alerted him, and he whispered a quick thanks to the cat demon as they both backed up.

The vines were obviously being controlled by something below ground, but they seemed equally aware of things on the surface, for they changed direction and came after him again; he was already reaching for ofuda scrolls, but the things were moving so quickly that he only had time to hit a few of them before realizing that running was his best chance. Kirara growled and took off in the other direction, forcing the demon to split its attack.

Miroku cursed. If she had stayed with him, he might have tried the wind tunnel, but if there was a chance of pulling her in with the demon he was not willing to take the risk.

He skidded to a halt. The vines did not immediately attack, seeming instead to be searching for the best chance at catching him. The tips were shaped like knives, and looked to be just as sharp - not exactly how he had planned on dying.

He dodged the first attack, even managing to land a blow with his staff that sent the first group reeling backward, disintegrating as they retreated. But without Kirara to warn him, he missed the arrival of another attack from underground.

Vines erupted from the earth beneath his feet, swarming, writhing, grabbing, squeezing… He struggled to pull free, but the vines held him tight and even wrapped around his staff to pull it from his grip. He realized with horror that the thing, whatever it was, was pulling him down, into the ground. Was this what had happened to Sango?

Something - thorns, or knifelike vine-tips - bit into his flesh.

He tasted blood.

The last thing he saw was Kirara shrinking to her small form and disappearing amid a stand of dead grass after being tossed aside by the vines. Then all he saw was darkness as the vines pulled him, squeezing and pricking him with dozens of thorns, into the pit.

 

"Demon slayer!"

Sango turned to see who had spoken. There was no sign of the demon that had been tormenting her, just a mass of vines that seemed to grow from every surface of the tunnel. She was pleased to see just how many she had severed in her fight, though she did not know if the damage would have any effect on the demon. So where had that voice come from? She was certain she had heard _something_.

"Demon slayer!" The voice was more insistent this time, and louder. Sango looked in the direction it had come from and nearly did a double take.

It was a very small woman, dressed in a fine kimono that was decorated with delicate embroidery. Her hair was green, and looked almost like leaves. For some reason, Sango was able to see the creature clearly in spite of the darkness.

"What… who… are you?"

"I am Midori."

Sango leaned closer to get a better look and winced due to a sudden stab of pain. "You're not a demon," she commented, hoarsely. "I sense no evil from you."

The small woman shrugged. "I bear no evil intent toward you, demon slayer. I am in need of your assistance."

Sango frowned. Skepticism seemed the best path, at least for now. She did not really want to admit to her own weakness; Midori's sudden appearance seemed a bit too fortunate for her tastes. "How do I know you won't end up being worse than the demon I'm trying to kill? Maybe I should squash you right now, while I have the chance."

Midori's eyes widened sadly and sparkled faintly with what might have been tears. "I'm asking you for help because I have no way to defend myself! If you kill me now, then you're no better than that _thing _up there!"

"Okay, fine. But I don't understand… Who are you? What are you doing in a place like this?" She paused, no longer sure of what to say or how much information to divulge. She did not think that Midori was dangerous, but then again, she had made more mistakes than usual over the past few days.

"I am the spirit of the tree," came the reply, as cryptic as any of her other comments. Sango frowned again; in other words, a tree demon, though one that was arguably non-malevolent. "That demon vine has been growing here some time now, growing slowly stronger and feeding off of my energy as well as that of any humans that stray too close." Her expression darkened. "I have no way to free myself, and so I seek your aid."

Sango nearly flinched at the words. She was not at all certain that she would survive this encounter, and did not need yet another obligation. She did not even know for sure if this creature was real. It, she, whatever it was, seemed impossibly small and to have appeared just in the nick of time to speak to her or save her, whatever its intentions were. It seemed too good to be true. It might have been no more than a figment of her imagination, some hallucination as she lay dying, or yet another trap.

Still… She didn't feel delirious. In fact, despite the physical aches, her mind felt clearer than it had in a long time. And, she had to admit, she really did not get the impression that this creature was a threat.

She was a demon slayer, for better or for worse. And as such, she could not deny aid to one in need, even if that one was perhaps not entirely human, even if that one might not actually exist. And besides, hadn't she just made a decision to fight, no matter her chances of coming out alive? What harm could there be in attempting to help this creature at the same time? After all, they apparently shared the same goal…

She forcibly tempered her urge to help first and ask questions later, knowing that at this point she could not afford to take unnecessary risks. "Midori… If it has been here so long and feeds on your energy… why did you not destroy it sooner?"

"I'm afraid I was lonely." When Sango made no response, aside from a confused blink of the eyes, she went on, "I have spent my entire life in this same spot. I really had no one to talk to… And so when this strange vine sprouted at the base of my tree, I allowed it to remain in the hopes of someday having… a friend."

"But your plan backfired."

"Yes. It grew more quickly than I expected, and very recently it became much stronger than I - and needless to say it had no interest in being my friend. Now it keeps me imprisoned here below ground, while my body withers away above. My roots are still strong, but I will not last much longer."

"I will help you if I can, Midori," Sango promised. She did not think that Midori was lying to her; the whole situation was simply too strange for that. She paused, uncertain of what to say next. Finally, she admitted, "But I don't quite understand what's going on. Where did it go? It was here… the vines…"

"I am not sure where our 'friend' has gone," Midori murmured thoughtfully, tilting her head and pressing a finger absentmindedly against her cheek. "My best guess is that something has attracted its attention and drawn it away. An intruder, perhaps."

An intruder? Sango's heart dropped. Miroku!

"I can temporarily create a barrier to keep the vines at bay," Midori continued, seemingly oblivious of Sango's turmoil. "That is why its vines are unable to harm you, even in its absence. But I will be unable to maintain the barrier for much longer."

Conscious of the fact that her reprieve would soon end, Sango forced herself upright. Her body ached from the abuse she had endured in the fight, but the pain was bearable, and even fading a bit. She gingerly pressed the blades along her arms back into place before retrieving her sword, doing her best to hide the wince as she bent to pick it up, and sheathing the weapon carefully. She took a deep breath, and tried to mentally prepare herself to return to battle.

"Midori," she asked, turning back to the tree spirit - or demon, whichever it was. "Does this thing have any weaknesses?"

"If I knew what that thing's weaknesses were," Midori replied sadly, "I would have found someone to exploit them long ago."

Sango forgot what she had intended to say next, as the creature faded in and out of view for a few seconds before returning to her former appearance.

"Y- you're not real," she managed, her voice little more than a hoarse whisper. It felt almost as if her heart had stopped; she felt oddly and vaguely betrayed. She had been so certain that this was not just another dream or illusion… Had she been wrong to trust Midori, and promise aid to the creature? If it was little more than another illusion, then it could very well be another trap.

"I am the spirit of the tree," Midori said. "This body, however, is a projection. An illusion, if you will. Without it I would be unable to communicate with you, Slayer."

She may have had a point, but Sango found it unnerving. Looking more closely, she realized that the figure was slightly transparent, a fact she might have noticed sooner had she not been so distracted by her own inner turmoil. "I'll do my best to help you," Sango said, struggling to reinforce the promise in her head. Saying it aloud again helped, but not by much. There was more at stake in this than just her own life; she found herself praying that she was wrong and that the demon had backed off for reasons of its own and not because Kirara had returned with Miroku. "But this thing is strong. I don't know if I can beat it."

"I only ask that you try. This may be my last chance." Midori gave a pained look, and vanished as the tunnel suddenly went dark. Sango realized that the barrier against the vines must have provided the light that enabled her to see Midori in the first place. Her voice came out of the darkness, somewhere, to say, "I am sorry… You must go now. I cannot hold it back any longer…"

Fully aware of every creaking, slithering sound as the vines began to move in the darkness, Sango turned and fled toward the opening. This time, protruding roots formed a ladder leading up and out of the hole; Sango fairly flew up and out, whispering a thanks to Midori for the assistance.

She only had time to look for Hiraikotsu and make a run for it before the vines came shooting up out of the hole after her. She grabbed the weapon on the run, and turned and made an expert throw in spite of the protests from her pained muscles. Her heart soared to see her weapon fly true, slicing through the vines effortlessly, and return to her hand. For the first time in many days, she felt real hope spring up in her heart, without the constant fear of failure. I can do this.

She caught hold of the weapon and swung it back into a ready stance with practiced ease. It felt _right _to be fighting; if only she had realized sooner how wrong it felt to run away.

The vines stopped coming for her, and after a moment coalesced into the form of a woman. "Demon slayer," the woman snarled, her voice harsh, but easily recognized.

Sango had to fight to keep her anger from overwhelming her at the sight of her adversary.

The demon continued before she had a chance to say anything. "So you've escaped while I had my back turned..." Her expression shifted from what might have been anger to what Sango recognized as pure smugness. "You seem more dangerous now that you've retrieved your weapon... Luckily my little expedition was not without its rewards."

With each word, Sango felt her fear returning - not fear that the demon could beat her, for she knew that fully armed and armored she would be a difficult opponent to defeat, but because she was now almost certain that Miroku and Kirara had fallen into a trap of some sort. And with bluster she did not feel, she responded, "I'm here to destroy you, demon. I won't let you distract me anymore!"

The demon grinned, radiating smug satisfaction. "Then you'll let your _companion _die?"

Sango frowned. She did not know what to think. She had sent Kirara to bring Miroku, but it did not seem like enough time had passed for Kirara to have made it back to their campsite and returned... But her memory was a bit hazy, and she had no idea how long she had been unconscious after the demon captured her. Maybe it had been long enough...

Shaking her head to clear it, she said, "I don't believe for a moment that you've managed to capture Miroku and Kirara, and I certainly don't believe that you'd let them go if I gave myself up."

"Suit yourself," the demon replied, shrugging.

Furious, Sango charged forward, intending to use momentum to strengthen her throw, when the ground suddenly fell away in front of her. Another pit... she realized with horror that the area must be filled with such holes, all cleverly camouflaged and unnoticeable. But what rose out of it only increased her horror.

An obscene mass of vines rose up, though unlike the rushing vines that had pursued her earlier, these rose and writhed together, surrounding some object that they slowly lifted into view.

It looked like… Miroku. Battered and bleeding and tangled up in so many vines that she couldn't count them all. Sango shuddered, with hatred and fear and fury all at the same time, and very nearly dropped Hiraikotsu.

It couldn't be him. She simply could not believe it. It did not seem possible.

How long had it been since the demon stopped squeezing the life from her and she'd spoken with Midori? For that matter, how long had she been unconscious in the first place? She'd lost all sense of time, somehow, and felt more than a little bit lost.

If it really was Miroku, and not an illusion, then where was Kirara? There was no sign of the cat demon.

"Do you believe now, Slayer?" the demon hissed.

"I…" she began, aware of the fact that she was trembling now. "I don't believe you." When she said she did not believe, she meant she could not believe, even though the proof of the demon's threat was right in front of her. She had to keep reminding herself that the demon had used illusions to trick her before, and was probably doing so again... still, she was shaken by the sight of Miroku wound up in the thorny vines, and shuddered at the thought that he might actually be so injured. "You've tricked me too many times. I'm sure you're lying to me again… But I can't take that chance." She hurled Hiraikotsu before she had even finished speaking, her heart pounding hard in her chest.

The weapon sliced through some of the vines, but not enough to free Miroku – if it was really him at all.

By the time she felt the vine wrapping around her ankle it was too late to escape; her frantic grab for Hiraikotsu missed the mark, and she hit the ground hard as the vine yanked her feet out from under her. A crash in the distance told her that Hiraikotsu had landed amidst a stand of thick brush, and she had little chance of recovering the weapon with any amount of speed.

She settled for drawing her sword and hacking her way free from the entangling vines.

By the time she made it back to her feet, she was breathing heavily and the pain from earlier was beginning to return.

"You are a wonderful source of energy, Slayer," the demon said, smiling. "So much anguish, so much torment, burning together inside of you. You bury your lust and your love and even your happiness, deep inside, like no other that I have seen. Give me that and I'll give you what you want."

Sango almost choked. It sounded almost _lustful_. She shuddered at the thought.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when something brushed against her leg and let out a soft mewling noise. "Kirara!"

Her pathetic hopes died at the sound, only to be replaced by cold desperation. "Kirara, can you fight?"

"Make up your mind, Slayer."

Kirara mewed again, then transformed into her larger form. "Good," Sango said, deliberately ignoring the demon.

"If you do not surrender than I shall use my thorns to poison him, and he will die even if you destroy me," it taunted, its voice strangely reasonable-sounding. "But if you give yourself up and let me devour you, then I will allow him to live."

Its constant prattling was starting to irritate her. Couldn't that thing take a hint? Did it think she was stupid? She knew there was no way it would let Miroku and Kirara go, even if she gave herself up. And this time, she had her armor, her weapons, her closest companions, and a reason to fight; if she was going to die, she was going to go down fighting.

_Demon slayers don't die on their knees…_ It was something Father had said to her once, something she seldom remembered, but his voice was strong in her heart now, a steady reminder that she could do this. For her friends, and for her own honor...

"I'll just have to fight fire with fire," Sango growled. Until this point she'd been reluctant to break into her supplies of poison, but she no longer felt the need to show any mercy. Not if the thing was seriously trying to kill Miroku. She could not let it do that. Without Miroku, she would be utterly lost.

She ran a hand through the thick fur along Kirara's back. "Kirara, can you distract it for me?"

The cat demon gave an assenting snarl and took off toward where the vine demon stood. Sango heard the sounds of a fierce struggle, but could not afford to glance in that direction; she knew Kirara was probably injured, and hoped that her friend would be all right, but at the same time she knew that she needed to get her sword back if she was going to have a chance at winning this battle.

Even on the run, Sango dug her hand into the storage compartment of her armor, feeling for the correct poison. She heard Kirara yelp, and pushed herself to move faster. She had long ago learned to identify each of the tiny containers by feel alone, and knew when she had the correct vial. She found it just in time, and had only a scant second to grab for her sword before the demon vines were on her again.

She turned quickly and dodged, rolling out of the way. She almost lost her grip on the sword, but managed to hang on and roll to her feet.

With one hand she popped the catch on the vial. The poison's pungent stench was enough to make her wish she'd brought her gas mask, though she knew it was not an airborne poison. Glowering at the demon, as if daring it to attack her, she poured the thick liquid over the blade of her sword, rubbing it in with one hand.

"Is this your idea of 'fighting fire with fire,' Slayer?"

Sango, her hands slick and burning with poison paste, snarled, "Die, demon!" and plunged the blade through the nearest vine and deep into the soil.

She had made sure to use the most potent poison in her arsenal, and the demon recoiled almost immediately. Sango smiled, knowing that the poison would spread outward from the wound she'd inflicted, as well as through the earth itself. She hoped Midori, if the tree creature really existed, had roots deep and widespread enough to avoid the worst of the poison.

"What the fuck have you done to me?" the vine demon demanded. It sounded horrified. Looking up, Sango realized that it was already beginning to disintegrate under the onslaught of poison.

She forced herself to her feet, despite her shaking, and stumbled over to where it stood. It seemed very thin and fragile now, hardly the intimidating figure it had cut before. "Die," she repeated, and slammed her sword into its neck. With her slippery fingers and battered blade, it was difficult, but she kept slicing into the thing until the head finally came off.

She knew that the 'head' was simply part of the shape it had chosen to take, and did not particularly care. She felt much better having decapitated the thing. With one last burst of fury, she jammed the sword into the creature's chest, where its heart would have been had it been a mortal creature rather than a demon. She left the sword there as the now lifeless body toppled over and finally hit the ground, and wiped her hands clean against her armor. A deep breath served to quell the worst of her shaking.

Somewhere behind her, Kirara made a soft chirping sound. She knew she had to look, but couldn't bear to do so immediately.

She took a few breaths to steady herself, and turned. She had been praying that this was not Miroku, after all, but seeing him in a bloody, crumpled heap on the ground was more than she could bear. She was at his side in an instant, her own injuries and fatigue forgotten. She could not even remember running to get there, nor flinging herself to the ground beside him.

The wounds looked superficial, but he seemed to be unconscious and his breathing was shallow. Had the demon poisoned him after all? And if so, was there an antidote? He moaned and stirred slightly, but did not wake; Sango felt her panic mounting by the second.

She had been desperately trying to delude herself… That Kirara had not gone after him, and that this was just another illusion from the demon, and that she would stumble back to the camp site and he would be there, and he would be angry with her for going off to fight and leaving him behind and -

And -

"Miroku! Please wake up... Miroku!"


	14. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

It was very late; Sango found herself wondering idly how much longer it would be before dawn. She had lost track of time during the fight, and had yet to regain any real sense of her bearings. Fear and exhaustion pulled at her, adding a dreamlike quality to everything around her, even the warm, solid bulk of Kirara against her back, even the unconscious man she clutched against her.

Despite all this, she had no real desire to sleep. Instead, she allowed herself the luxury of fretting over Miroku. And, secretly, of being close to him.

She had taken some time to examine his injuries more closely, making sure that she was not missing something serious; she had blushed and trembled with nervousness nearly the whole time, knowing that if he woke up while she was looking him over, she would never hear the end of his teasing. Thankfully, it appeared that his wounds were merely scratches, the deepest of which barely pierced through the skin of his arm. But it was worrying that he was still unconscious.

The demon had mentioned poison, and the thought of it tormented her. Had she killed the thing too late? If he had been poisoned, she knew that right now there was very little that she could do to help him, if she could do anything at all. Guilt ate away at her regardless.

If he died now… she did not think she could live with herself. She had been so foolish lately, so worked up over something needless like pride. She felt bitter and manipulated, angry with herself and the demon that had provoked such feelings of weakness and worthlessness.

She had done what she had set out to do. She had proved that she had the strength to defeat the demon that had trapped her… but at what cost?

She looked down at Miroku and fought against the tears that had been threatening to fall ever since the battle ended. What was pride, if it cost her the life of this man, who she cared for so deeply?

Her heart leapt into her throat as he suddenly stirred. She felt his forehead and noted that he was slightly feverish even though the night was far from warm. She should have thought to build a fire, even a small one, but she had been reluctant to leave his side for even a moment. They had Kirara to keep them warm, and for now that would have to suffice. She would go after supplies in the morning.

Without realizing it, her hand had moved to caress his cheek. Miroku stirred slightly at her touch. "Sango," he murmured, his voice breathy and deathly quiet. "You… said my name…"

"Shh," she soothed. "Don't worry about that now." Somehow, she managed to keep her voice calm in spite of the blush that had crept across her cheeks. She vaguely remembered shouting _something_, something that might have been his name if she were really pressed to admit it, before rushing to his side… but she was as reluctant as ever to use his given name.

She might use his name in her dreams, but right now it was too much. It felt too intimate, too close.

It was almost enough to make her laugh, this silly insistence on building barriers between them, when they had just been through hell together. The night had given her an odd and increasingly intense sense of clarity in spite of the late hour.

Miroku murmured her name again, and groaned but did not wake.

This was far from ideal, sleeping out in the open, in her armor and with no shelter to be had, but she could feel sleep pulling at her. She clutched Miroku closer, heedless of the way he was sprawled beside and across her, and let out a deep breath. It would be so easy to stop worrying, to cease her attempts at alertness, to just to succumb…

"Kirara, please keep watch…"

 

Kagome woke with a start, only to realize that she'd fallen asleep against Inuyasha. She had been dreaming, she thought, though even now she could not remember what she might have been dreaming about. Still, it left her with a bad feeling, and chilled to the bone despite the fact that she should have been quite warm, nestled against Inuyasha like that.

It took her a moment more to realize that Inuyasha was awake, and watching her intently.

"Bad dream?" he asked, his voice oddly gentle.

"Yeah," she sighed. "I don't remember the details, but…"

He made a small sound that might have been derisive - or concerned. "Must've been pretty bad for you to wake up like that. Usually you just sleep through it."

She had always thought that he watched over her while she slept; she had come awake in the night to see golden eyes peering through the darkness too many times to deny that fact, no matter her insecurities. Still, it was odd for him to talk even remotely openly about, well, anything.

"It's almost light," he commented. "You feel like heading out early?"

Unconsciously, she tilted her head to one side. _He's _asking_ me what I want to do? Am I still dreaming?_

Taking a chance and snuggling up against him again, she murmured, "Can we stay here for a little while longer?"

He leaned back a bit and feigned nonchalance. She thrilled at his acceptance of the contact. "Keh, whatever." After a moment, he seemed to reconsider. "You that shook up about it?"

"About what?"

"That dream."

"It was just a bad dream… nothing to worry about."

 

Miroku felt hot, feverish… and disoriented. Strange, vivid dreams had plagued him for much of the night, and he did not feel particularly rested. He woke gradually, feeling reluctant to open his eyes or even move. He honestly had not thought that he would survive his fight with the vine demon, and did not remember breaking free of its trap. All things considered, he felt quite well.

For the moment he was content to stay where he was; his head was pillowed against something pleasantly soft, and one of his hands, near his face, was pressed against more pleasant softness. It seemed that the angle was all wrong for a pillow, so he gave an experimental squeeze.

Interesting.

_That_ felt familiar. Very familiar, indeed. In fact, he would have staked his life on the fact that it was Sango's breast beneath his palm.

So he squeezed again, and earned an offended, if sleepy, grunt from the demon slayer. When she did not slap him or otherwise retaliate, he changed his tactic and rubbed enthusiastically; failing all else, he could always blame the fever. Since he had survived, he intended to make the most of his... delicate state while he had the chance.

Sango jumped suddenly, as if coming fully awake for the first time. He felt her shift and knew she was scrutinizing him now, so he let his hand come to a stop.

"You're alive!" she exclaimed.

He opened his eyes halfway and peered up at her. "You sound surprised," he murmured. He was surprised to find it relatively difficult to speak.

At the same time, she frowned and said, "Please move your hand."

He gave an exaggerated sigh, but complied with her request; his movements were forced and sluggish, much to his annoyance. It was as if he had lost control of his body and was only now regaining it. He had enough experience with poison to know that this was not quite right; this felt more like… possession, like his consciousness had been forcibly suppressed. That would explain his fuzzy memory of the past night.

"How are you feeling?" Sango asked, shifting a bit to find a more comfortable position.

"Better than last night, all things considered," he offered. What little he did remember of the previous night consisted of a wild flight after Sango, a losing battle with a demon that turned out to be far stronger than he had expected… and briefly coming to in Sango's arms, hearing her say his name - not his title, his _name_. But then, nothing. He was not sure which of the brief flashes of memory were real and which might be only fevered imaginings. But now, at least, everything was peaceful and they were both in one piece, if a little battered. "I take it we were victorious?"

Sango nodded. "I…" She could not finish immediately, and had to take a breath and compose herself before continuing. "I'm so sorry! Please forgive me!" Tears welled in her eyes, tears she had, he would guess, refused to shed during the night. "I should never have lied to you like that."

"There is no need to apologize." Seeing the melancholy, guilty look she gave him, he added, "I have to admit, I was angry… but right now I'm just glad we're both alive."

He _had_ been angry with her, angrier than he could recall being in a long time. He understood, or tried to, why she had done the things she had done, but it stung that she had lied to him. He had to wonder if she would ever understand that all he wanted was to help her. Well, maybe that wasn't _all_ he wanted.

"What's that look for?" he asked, noting the dark expression that had crept onto Sango's face.

"You," she replied slowly. "You've got this strange look on your face…"

"I do?" He tried to keep his voice light and innocent.

"You were almost smirking at me. How can you be having perverted thoughts at a time like this?"

He could think of a hundred reasons, though not a single one that he thought she might understand. For all that she wore her emotions openly, she kept a tight hold on proper decorum, and kept her heart as closed off as she could. Even now, as she held him in her arms, they were as far apart as ever. He wondered if she even noticed.

Instead of voicing any of these concerns, he opted for indignity. "Why is it that you always assume that my thoughts are perverted?"

She had the decency to look contrite, and he immediately regretted his harsh tone. He might be angry, but he knew she did not deserve that sort of insult. "I'm sorry," she whispered; one of Kirara's tails brushed against him slightly, reminding him of her presence, and warning him not to upset her mistress.

He reached up to caress Sango's face; the movement took less effort than he had expected, given his earlier state. Things were getting easier; that was good. "Sango, don't beat yourself up about this," he soothed. "I think the demon did a good enough job of that."

"Can you ever forgive me for being such a fool?"

"If you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

"What are you talking about?"

His hand slipped down, caressing her neck before pressing lightly, pulling her face toward his and pressing her lips to his…

It wasn't his best kiss, and it certainly wasn't helping his fever. And it was very likely to earn him more pain, just as soon as Sango came to her senses. All around, it was not a very smart move, even for him.

And to be perfectly honest with himself, he had to admit that he had no real idea what had possessed him to do such a thing, except that the moment and the situation seemed, if not perfect, to be as good an opportunity as any. They had just gone through hell together, she was vulnerable, they were alone (a rarity itself), and he wanted desperately to distract her from her self-blame…

It was an awkward position, but she still managed to hit him. Small solace that she did it more gently than usual, and did not hit him again after he let her pull away. Kirara snarled at him for the infraction against her mistress, and Sango looked, well, _hurt_. Betrayed, almost, in spite of the blush that spread across her cheeks. Why did this have to happen every time he touched her? Why couldn't she understand that he was trying to comfort her and distract her from her sorrows? But he did not put voice to any of those questions, opting for something a bit more indignant.

"Are you always going to slap me away?"

She looked guilty even before he had finished speaking. This was the closest they had come to really fighting with one another, at least while they were both in control of their own actions. The last time had led to a proposal, of sorts, but this seemed destined to lead them only into more strife. _Damn it all, Sango, what do I have to do to get you to let me in?_

"I'm sorry. I'm still… I shouldn't have done that," she fumbled.

Sango peered around them then, no doubt in an attempt to avoid looking at _him_, and blinked rapidly in surprise. "The tree!"

Patience was becoming a mantra… He let his eyes drift closed. "What about it?"

"It was dead last night…"

He opened his eyes and realized that she was right. The tree had been dead, or at least leafless, when he had seen it previously… yet now they were shaded by a thick canopy of leaves.

"Demon slayer!"

Miroku started at the sudden sound; he had been fairly certain that they were alone, and was not in any position to see who had spoken.

"Midori?" Sango's voice was questioning, but she seemed to know who she was talking to. This far from the closest village, Miroku had to wonder who - or what - that might be.

"I don't mean to interrupt, but I have some things for you. Consider it a show of my eternal gratitude."

Sango slipped away, easing him into a more comfortable position against Kirara, and strode toward the source of the sound. As she moved to the side, he could see who she was talking to: a small creature shrouded in leaves and perched on a protruding root. His dulled senses managed to convey that it - she? - was some sort of demon, though she did not seem malevolent. Quite the opposite, actually, as she seemed intent on giving Sango some gift.

Sango seemed to remember that he had no idea who this creature was, and turned to explain. "Miroku, this is Midori. She is a tree spirit," she said, though Miroku mentally substituted "demon" for "spirit". She went on to tell him the story of her own battle against the demon, and imprisonment underground, from which the equally trapped Midori had helped free her in exchange for aid. He rather suspected that she was leaving out large portions of the story, but knew he would have to settle for this much, at least for now.

Smiling happily, Midori added, "I've grown much stronger since she killed that parasite. Look!" She held something up, something that glinted dully in the shade. "My tree is alive again, and I can even use this form to pick things up now."

Sango looked back at Miroku over her shoulder. "Is that…"

"I've been keeping this safe for you, while you slept," Midori said, offering the object to Sango. Her eyes widened at the sight, and she gingerly plucked it from the small creature's grasp.

"Look, a jewel shard," she murmured, holding it up so Miroku could see. It glowed faintly, a purplish hue that indicated that it was tainted.

"Was that demon always in possession of this shard?" Miroku asked, half to himself.

Midori shook her head. "I remember the day well… a strange woman came to the clearing and gave it to the vine demon, just a few days before you arrived. She promised that the jewel shard would bring great power… That's when it overwhelmed me and forced me underground."

"A strange woman…" Miroku knew that Sango was thinking of Kagura; indeed, he had immediately thought of the wind demon upon hearing Midori's explanation. If Kagura was involved, that meant that Naraku either knew of what had happened, or had a hand in the demon's schemes from the start.

But why target Sango? Miroku frowned. Unless the objective had not been to target Sango but to separate the two of them from Inuyasha and Kagome, in which case the plan had worked flawlessly.

"I don't think we can afford to linger here," he said, cautiously.

Sango seemed to agree without further explanation. Nodding, she added, "We need to get this shard to Kagome as quickly as possible."

"There is something else," Midori added, sounding a bit miffed at being ignored even for a short time. Once both humans had their attention on her, she continued, "On the eastern side of my tree's trunk, there is an old altar that was once tended by humans from the surrounding villages. I've filled a vessel there with a curative made from the sap that flows through my veins. If you drink it, it should work as an antidote against poisons."

"I… thank you, Midori!" Sango's eyes were wide with excitement, and relief. Miroku knew why. If she could find any way at all to protect him from Naraku's poisonous insects, Sango would be greatly relieved. Midori seemed to have provided just such protection. He only hoped it would actually work.

Eying him slyly as Sango walked away in search of the altar, and probably noting his appreciative glance at the demon slayer's rear, Midori said conspiratorially, "You know, if you wanted I could make you a potion that would encourage her to be more… open to you."

"I appreciate the offer, but I think I'll take my chances." Once, he might have accepted the offer of a potion to help win the affections of a beautiful woman, or he might have made some show of bravado or hint of romantic prowess. But to use such methods on Sango felt a lot like cheating. If he was going to win her, it would be on his own merits; he knew she was worth the effort.

"Suit yourself," Midori said, shrugging.

Sango returned shortly thereafter, with a small clay vessel in her hand. She tested the lid to make sure it was tight before tucking it away into some compartment of her armor and sitting next to Miroku. "Do you think you can walk?" He noted that her face was still flushed, and wondered if she had overheard Midori's offer, or if she was still affected by the kiss.

"I can try."

Together, they managed to get him to his feet. He felt wobbly and weak, but was able to hold his own weight - until Sango let go of him. She managed to catch him and keep him upright before he could fall flat on his butt, but was frowning in consternation.

"Okay," she grumbled, "I guess this means we ride. Kirara, do you think you can carry us?"

The cat demon stood and shook herself. She looked as exhausted as he felt. What he wouldn't give for a night or two at an upscale inn…

 

They bid farewell to Midori shortly after that. Having retrieved and cleaned all of her weaponry, Sango felt it best that they get moving as soon as possible, and so they set off back in the direction of the camp they had abandoned the night before. Miroku rode on Kirara's back, with Sango walking beside. Their progress was slow, due to injuries all around.

Sango hoped that Miroku would not notice, despite the way her faltering steps and half-hidden limp attested, that she was more injured than she was willing to let on. But she pressed onward, determined to get them to camp and a source of supplies and water before nightfall.

Rather than keep going, Sango chose to simply stop for the night at their camp from earlier; it had easy access to water, and they would not have to pack up their supplies, or carry them.

She did a quick check of what was left at their campsite, and it appeared to be thankfully undisturbed by animals or other travelers. They still had plenty of supplies, though they would need fresh water, and her extra clothes and bedroll were intact.

She cleaned off her blankets, and ushered Miroku to the makeshift bed. Once she had him more or less settled, she turned to Kirara. "I'm going to the stream. Keep an eye on him," she murmured, knowing the cat would welcome an opportunity for a rest.

The stream was small and peaceful, a welcome change from the past few days. She felt almost at ease, with the demon that had tormented her now dead and gone. She filled their water bottles, and a pot to heat water for the instant food she planned to make when she got back to camp.

She had grabbed her clothes before heading to the stream, and, after a quick look around, stripped out of her armor and slipped into the water. It was not deep, but it felt blessedly cool and clean after wearing her armor for so long.

She washed herself as best as she could, giving herself time to gingerly feel out all her new bruises and scrapes, and made her way back to camp feeling much refreshed.

Miroku and Kirara appeared to be dozing, so Sango set about building a fire and setting the water to boil for their dinner as quietly as she could. She was reluctant to disturb her friends, but felt that Miroku should eat something. She carefully carried two cups of noodles to his side, and sat next to him.

He stirred slightly even without her having to say anything.

"Here," she said softly. "I made you some noodles. How are you feeling?"

"I could sleep for a week," he muttered.

She smiled slightly. If he was complaining, that was definitely a good sign. "Eat," she urged.

Grinning wryly, he admitted, "I can't say no to a beautiful woman." With some effort, he was able to sit up on his own, and take the foam cup of noodles from her. She sat down beside him to eat her own meal, and gave a nod to Kirara to indicate that she was free to find her own dinner.

They ate in silence. Sango felt quite flustered at his attentions. He was injured. He was in no state to be doing silly things like… like flirting, or kissing her. If anything, he should be furious with her for lying to him; he said he had felt angry, but there was no sign of that now. In some ways she was relieved, but in others she felt even more guilty than if he had yelled at her or fought with her.

_How do I fix this?_

She realized that the best way would be to do what she had failed to do before - give up on her pride - if it meant repairing things with Miroku. As much as it flustered her to admit it, he cared for her, and he wanted to help her. If she wanted to help him, and make things right, then maybe she had to be more open with him. Maybe shutting him out was the wrong tactic altogether.

It stung, because she knew deep in her heart that she had done the same to Inuyasha and Kagome, and it had very nearly cost her Miroku - and her own life. She needed to get past this, to make things right with Miroku before she had to deal with their friends. Inuyasha might understand her warrior's pride, but she did not think she could handle facing Kagome without Miroku's support.

Realizing belatedly that the noodles were long gone and she was still sitting beside Miroku in ominous silence, she quickly moved to take the empty containers and dispose of them near the edge of the campsite. She tended to the fire, and returned to Miroku's side.

"You should get some rest," he said, his voice calm. "We'll need our strength, to find our friends as quickly as possible."

"You stay here, I'll sleep with Kirara when she returns," she said, pressing a hand on his chest to make him lie down, and to keep him there. "And don't think about giving me any excuses -"

"Do you think I didn't notice that you are injured as well?"

She sighed. "I'm just sore. It'll pass." He gave her a skeptical look, and she had to look away. "I - you should rest." She moved to pull away, but he caught her hand in his and held her still.

"Just… stay beside me." She had thought to refuse, but the look in his eyes changed her mind. The earnest expression there tore at her heart. "I thought you would die, or we'd both be lost. I'd feel better if you were near."

Her breath escaped in a rush. She felt overwhelmed by nervousness, shame, excitement…

"Okay, I- I will…"


	15. Chapter Fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

The first thing that Sango realized when she woke up was that the warm weight against her chest was Kirara, and not, as she had suspected, anything to do with Miroku. She lay on her side, the cat curled up against her chest and snuggled under her chin. And Miroku… When she had gone to sleep, he had been turned away from her, that they might sleep back to back. Sometime during the night he had shifted, turning, moving closer to wrap an arm around her waist, but his hands were very much in neutral territory.

It was very early still. It was light, but just barely. The night had left her with a slight chill, but they were close enough together to share body heat, staving off the worst of it.

Sango sighed and closed her eyes again. She liked it when Miroku held her like this, she had to admit; when he was being gentle and kind, without throwing any sort of perverted action or comment into the mix at an inappropriate time…

It had been a long time since she felt this relaxed and happy, with little worry hanging over her head. It was not difficult to imagine their quest being over, starting their new life together. Her face heated as her thoughts drifted to marriage and children. Someday, she promised herself, they would make that life.

But for now, they must continue their quest, no matter how much she longed not only to stay put, but to snuggle closer to him and stay that way until he woke up. Instead, she tried to maintain as proper a distance between them as their compromised position would allow, and turned her thoughts - with some effort - elsewhere.

With the vine demon destroyed and a tainted shard of the Shikon Jewel in their possession, they would have to find their friends soon. The shard would have to be purified, and they needed to continue their hunt for Naraku before it was too late to save Miroku's life.

It was a lot to accomplish in a short time, she knew, but for the first time in a long while she found herself feeling cautiously optimistic. They had succeeded in battle here, _she_ had succeeded in battle here, where the odds seemed stacked impossibly against them; perhaps they had a chance against Naraku, after all. Only time would tell, and she found that she was looking forward to the final showdown, whenever that might be. The matter of Naraku needed to be settled, once and for all. Only then could she turn her attention to her feelings toward Miroku, and even the conundrum of her brother, Kohaku.

It struck her, then, how long it had been since she had found time to dedicate to worrying over Kohaku's fate, to solving the problem of how to save his life. She had been so very distracted lately, that she had even managed to forget one of her most important objectives…

She realized, somewhat wryly, that she had been doing her job. Somewhere along the line, amidst all of her fears and doubts, she had stopped focusing on her problems and shifted her attention toward the slaying of demons as a solution to those problems. She had lost her focus on the wider scope of things. Some of it she could attribute to the demon's manipulation, but the rest… It scared her a little, that single-mindedness.

"Why so tense?" Miroku asked suddenly, startling her out of her reverie.

"Thinking," she confided, "about the future. What to do next. Where we go from here."

She knew he was grinning, even though she could not see him as he spoke. "Well, I would suggest that our first step be to locate our missing companions."

"Yes, but where? Do you think they would have waited for us at Kaede's village all this time?"

"I sincerely doubt that Inuyasha's patience was able to last this long," Miroku said serenely. "They are most likely on our trail by now."

She had been so lost in thought that she had not noticed the way his hand had begun to move, rubbing and massaging all along her middle, but she noticed it now. The movements were comforting, though it seemed as if he was avoiding all the obvious targets for his lechery; if she wasn't mistaken, he was just as tense as she was. Did that mean he was _trying_ not to grope her?

The thought was unexpected, and startling. If that was the case, how long had this been going on right under her nose? He had hinted at such a thing earlier, she realized, thinking back to a discussion they had in the first demon's lair. Sure, he had made some perverted comments since then, and even touched her inappropriately… but something seemed different about his behavior now.

She had dismissed the idea almost out of hand at first, because it seemed like something he would do in an attempt to win her over, to get what he wanted from her, like he did with so many other women: pretty words, gentle touches. Now, she did not feel like he was trying to gain anything from her, merely to assure himself of her well-being. It no longer felt like some potentially perverted plan. It felt like he was really making an effort to change.

The notion made her heart beat fast. She had never really thought that he _would_ change, or that they would make any sort of progress in their relationship, at least not until Naraku was dead.

"… You're not listening to me, are you?"

She blushed hotly at that, because it was true.

It took her a moment to answer, and finally she had to pull away from him to do so; his hand, come to a stop and splayed across her abdomen just above the hip, proved too distracting, his closeness scattering her thoughts even as a traitorous, insistent heat gathered between her legs. Reminding herself that she had a quest to complete before she could even think about being with Miroku was nearly impossible beside the pull of desire.

Never mind that he let her go easily and without question; she could feel the lingering heat of his touch even after moving to sit facing him, with a safe distance between them.

"I - I'm sorry," she stammered, certain that the ever increasing redness of her cheeks would never fade. Even with physical distance between them she could barely focus enough to give even that pathetic response.

"Is something the matter?" he asked. She could have sworn that he knew _exactly_ what was the matter, and was only asking to rub it in.

"It's nothing," she said, her tone harsher than she had intended, but thankfully free of her customary embarrassed stammering. She had never wished so ardently that he would grope her. She yearned to be able to simply hit him, or yell at him, and restore the space between them, but knew she had no such recourse now. He had done nothing wrong. She did not really know how to respond to that.

"If you say so," he said, half to himself. But his gaze was intense as he scrutinized her. She had to look away, and eventually got up and started tending to the fire so she could make some breakfast.

She had expected more teasing, but he merely quirked a brow and let it rest at that.

 

After only a short rest, and with the sun climbing ever higher in the sky, Kagome knew that she had to give in to Inuyasha's demands to get going. She was just as eager as he was to leave, but wished she could hang on to the morning's peace for just a bit longer.

The journey was uneventful, with most of the day spent clinging to Inuyasha's back while he sped down the road. For the most part, they traveled in silence, which had the unfortunate effect of giving all three of them plenty of time to think.

Kagome felt sick with worry, as if it were a living, growing darkness pulsing within her heart. The closer they got to their objective with no sign of their friends, the more it - and her sense of guilt - grew. If they weren't here, she had no idea where to keep looking for them. It was almost as if they had simply disappeared.

For all his bluster, she was not sure that Inuyasha could track them, if he could not find the trail first. The only other option would be Mushin's temple, and she could think of no reason for Miroku and Sango to leave so suddenly and secretively if this were their goal. Inuyasha's theory that something had happened at this village, something that had drawn their friends back here in secret, seemed much more plausible.

But even so, as the days of journeying had worn on without a single clue, she had begun to doubt. And with doubt came worry, guilt… Despite Inuyasha's insistence to the contrary, it was all too easy to blame herself for all this. She could not help but think that she must have missed some hint, some clue as to what was going on, something that could have helped her prevent this from happening.

They were still some distance from the village when Kagome realized that the nagging sensation that had been plaguing her nearly all day was the feeling of a dark aura nearby. It had to be a very strong demon to create an aura that powerful. She knew of very few demons that were capable of using such power, and most of those were incarnations of Naraku.

She shuddered.

If Naraku _was_ involved, and this was where their friends were, then Miroku and Sango were in grave danger.

She couldn't be certain, not yet at least, but that did not stop her imagination from conjuring up horrible images of what Naraku might do to her friends. She leaned forward from her place on his back to ask Inuyasha, "Do you feel that?"

"Keh, I smell it, too," he confirmed. "Blood, and smoke, and Naraku's stench."

"Then let's hurry," she urged. "We have to help the villagers!" She was certain that the scents Inuyasha smelled and the overpowering dark aura were related; no doubt one of Naraku's minions was attacking the village. She felt a strong sense of worry and of anticipation. Was this where they would find their friends? And, if so, would they even still be alive?

She hoped so. She did not know what she would do without Miroku or Sango… though she wanted to give both of them a stern talking-to about running off in secret.

Inuyasha ran as quickly as the thickly forested path would allow, and Kagome found herself peering eagerly over his shoulder, searching for any glimpse of the village. She half hoped she would see their friends, fighting some demon to save the villagers, and half hoped that they were not here and were instead somewhere else and perfectly safe.

Inuyasha swore suddenly and leapt off the path into a thick stand of underbrush, narrowly missing a blast that came seemingly out of nowhere. He hit the ground hard and rolled, tossing Kagome and Shippo off his back, and drawing Tetsusaiga as he regained his feet.

"Hmm, what do we have here?" drawled a familiar, feminine voice from somewhere above them. Kagome looked upward to see Kagura, hovering in midair and looking anything but interested in the situation at hand.

The wind demon raised her fan, her bored expression never changing, and swung it again. The resulting energy blast barely missed Kagome and Shippo. As the dust cleared, Kagome could see that Inuyasha had easily leapt out of the way, though he did not look at all pleased.

"Kagome! Take Shippo and get somewhere safe!"

Kagome nodded and took off, Shippo in tow. She heard Kagura's laughter from somewhere behind her, but dared not turn to look. She trusted Inuyasha to handle the situation. Mostly, at least.

If he could keep Kagura busy, she would have a chance to check the village for signs of Miroku and Sango, and maybe even ask the villagers. If there were any villagers left, after Kagura's attack.

There was smoke everywhere. Several buildings had collapsed, and many of the others were on fire. This close, even she could smell the blood, and she caught sight of many twisted, bloodied bodies lying strewn about the streets. She had to fight hard against a powerful gag reflex when she nearly tripped over a severed arm.

"Ka – Ka – Kagome," Shippo stammered anxiously. She could hear the horror in his voice.

"Why would Kagura do this?" she asked aloud, needing something else to focus on. At the very least, she thought thankfully, there was no apparent sign of Miroku or Sango amidst the carnage. Surely, if they were here, they would have made some attempt to fight back instead of standing by while the villagers were slain.

Shippo had no answer for her. Maybe there was no answer; maybe it was destruction for destruction's sake. She had no way of knowing what Naraku's plan might be.

A groan nearby had her whirling in alarm, reaching for her bow and arrows and wishing she had thought to ready her weapons before running for cover. She sighed with relief when she realized that the sound had come from one of the wounded villagers, a middle aged woman with a large bruise darkening one of her cheeks and a cut across her forehead. She was lying near the entrance to a hut that was half-collapsed.

Deciding it was as good a place as any to hide, and because she needed to help the village woman if she could, Kagome made a cautious approach. "Are you all right?" she asked, keeping her voice as quiet as possible.

The woman looked startled, but realized right away that Kagome was no threat to her. Her eyes were wide. "I'll be fine," she said, then blinked in shock and added, "I remember you." She did not sound fine, but Kagome supposed that had a lot to do with the fact that her village had just been destroyed. She helped the woman sit up into a more comfortable position, leaning against the wall of the hut.

"My friend is fighting the demon," she explained. "Can you tell me what happened here?"

"The wind demon came searching for something," the woman said finally. "When it could not find what it came for, it started destroying our village and killing our people."

Looking for something…

What would Kagura be looking for in this place? Miroku and Sango? Or…

Kagome's eyes went wide. She could feel a jewel shard approaching.

If it was another demon joining the attack, she did not have much time. But at the same time, she had to wonder if this might be why Miroku and Sango would have returned. If they had suspected the presence of a jewel shard, that would have been enough motivation, although it was still a mystery as to why they had gone alone and in secret.

"What about our friends? The demon slayer and the monk," Kagome pressed. She needed to know, and trusted Inuyasha to keep Kagura's attacks away long enough for her to find the answers.

"They were here," the woman managed, "a few days ago. But they left, in search of a demon, and have not returned."

Kagome frowned. Her thoughts were interrupted, her breath leaving her chest in a rush as Inuyasha swooped in out of nowhere to haul her and the hapless village woman to safety, one tucked under each arm. The hut they had been hiding beside was destroyed not a moment later, rubble flying behind them.

"Pay more attention, wench," Inuyasha grumbled. "Or the bitch'll get you next time."

Hearing him call her "wench" again stung. She had not been expecting it, even if she could understand and justify it in her mind. He was frustrated, worried, preoccupied by the battle… and she had disappointed him by getting in harm's way…

Inuyasha ran away from the village with long, powerful strides, heading into the relative cover of the forest. Kagome had to forget her own indignation at being called "wench" at the realization that he was trying to protect the village as well. He had bigger priorities and, she reminded herself, old habits die hard.

He skillfully avoided each of Kagura's attacks, but with his arms full carrying Kagome and the village woman, he was unable to use his sword or otherwise fight back.

"Inuyasha, find some place to put us down," she urged, grunting as Shippo struggled to keep his grip on her shoulder. If they did not stop soon, he was likely to choke her with the collar of her shirt.

"Keh, what do you think I'm trying to do?"

Suddenly, Kagura's voice came from very close by. "Do you think you can run from the wind, Inuyasha?"

With a wave of her fan, blades formed out of the air and shot toward them. Inuyasha dodged each volley, but just barely, and accompanied by an increasingly impressive string of curses.

Inuyasha dodged quickly out of the way of the last of the blades, tossing Kagome and the others into a nearby stand of brush and drawing Tetsusaiga.

He was quick, and managed to block most of the attack with the sword's blade, but the force of the blow sent him reeling backward. Kagura followed, chuckling softly to herself.

Kagome hit the ground and sprang to her feet. Shippo gave a cry as he was flung off her shoulder; both the fox kit and the village woman rolled to the ground and lay still. Kagome knew that she could not let them stay in harm's way. She had to help Inuyasha.

She dropped her pack and drew her bow and one of her arrows. She did not want to use such force on Kagura, and was not even certain that a projectile would be able to strike a wind demon.

An inner voice, fraught with doubt, sneered that Kagura would simply bat away such an impotent attack.

As she nocked it to the bow, the arrow flared to life, glowing with spiritual power. The half-conscious village woman gasped in surprise, but Kagome steeled herself - and her resolve - as best as she could.

She stepped cautiously out of the bush, searching for a clear shot.

To save Inuyasha and what was left of the village, she would try, even if she had no chance.

A distraction would be enough, even if her arrow did not hit its mark.

Right?

 

Sango had thought it would be best to ride Kirara for the return journey, rather than waste energy on walking, especially with Miroku still recovering from his injuries. But now, with smoke on the horizon and the occasional sounds of battle carried on the wind, she was having second thoughts.

She was not sure that they could handle another fight just yet, though she had to wonder what might be going on at the village now. Curiosity combined with guilt and a strong sense of duty. If there was a demon behind this, it was her responsibility to help however she could, even if that only meant treating the wounded and helping the survivors to rebuild.

She felt a sick tightness in her gut, and had to forcibly remind herself that not only had she killed the vine demon, this sort of destruction was not something it would have been likely to do in the first place. It had been the sort of demon that preferred to quietly manipulate people into obedience, not create open and disgusting displays of violence.

"A battle," Miroku observed, drawing her back to reality.

"Yes," she agreed. A few moments later, she caught sight of a good-sized clearing, and directed Kirara to land there. It was only a short distance from the village, and before they landed she thought she saw a Wind Scar blast. "Did you see that?"

"It would seem that our friends are not far off. I wonder what they've found at the village…"

Dismounting from Kirara, Sango headed a short distance into the trees to change into her armor. To her dismay, Miroku made to follow her, a fact that she did not notice until she had her robe nearly opened.

She grunted angrily, and forced the fabric back into place. "Don't stay here and watch me change, you pervert! Go help them!"

The monk chuckled, but did as she asked. It was a strange thing to see that man obey such a request with no protest, which automatically made her suspicious. Sure, she had gotten the distinct impression that he was trying to change his ways, but here he was, doing something that was quite possibly perverted.

He stopped laughing abruptly, and she knew from the silence that he had stopped moving. Her suspicion only deepened. Her heart filled not with anger, but sadness. She wanted him to stop being such a pervert. It felt like he had betrayed her trust.

"Don't make me tell you again, monk," she added sternly, hoping to entice him to leave her in peace. She scrambled to finish with her armor, fastening the final closure at the neck before grabbing Hiraikotsu and moving to follow Miroku. He had stopped a short distance away, and was watching something intently.

She had to wonder, with no little frustration, just what it was that was keeping him from going to their friends, as the sounds of battle grew louder and closer with each passing moment.

"I told you to go help them," Sango said, frowning and trailing off as she caught sight of what had Miroku so transfixed. "… Kohaku."


	16. Chapter Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Kagome focused all of her attention on Kagura, knowing that she had only a few seconds to fire her arrow before the wind demon noticed what she was up to, or attacked Inuyasha again. Her arms shook slightly from the strain of pulling back the string, but finally she felt that her aim was correct and let the arrow fly, flaring pink with spiritual energy as it went.

It missed, of course. By roughly a mile, she admitted rather sourly. But it had the desired effect of distracting Kagura from Inuyasha. The distraction gave him a chance to get back on his feet and make a counterattack.

The first attempt with the Wind Scar missed, and Kagura fired back almost immediately. The next shot nearly hit her, but she made no move to deflect the attack. The expression on her face, a combination of shock and frustration, was telling.

_Kagura's outmatched_, Kagome realized suddenly. The wind demon usually fled when the odds turned against her, whether she had accomplished her objective or not. What could be compelling her to stay?

She was about to shout her suspicions to Inuyasha when she caught the sound of something crashing through the underbrush toward them, though she could not yet make out what it was. Kagura smirked and muttered, "About time."

 

"Kohaku…"

Any good feelings Sango may have had from the morning disappeared the moment she laid eyes on her brother. Miroku could tell without even looking at her. He knew her pain too well.

She had seemed so happy in the morning, had even smiled at him before they set off on Kirara… and now all of that was gone, evaporated in an instant at the mere sight of her brother.

It left Miroku feeling strangely angry and unsettled. He had not told her of his own suspicious feelings yet, the lingering sense of darkness and wrongness, choosing instead to enjoy what would probably be their last uninterrupted morning together. And now it seemed he would not get an opportunity. He could only hope that it would amount to nothing.

This was more important than his baseless feelings of taint, anyway. He had a feeling he knew what Kohaku was after. Naraku would never let one of his jewel shards fall into their hands so easily. He would have planned for the demon's demise and their retrieval of the shard even if he thought it unlikely. Miroku narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

For a long time the boy said nothing. He seemed content simply to stare down his opponents.

If he was happy with the staring contest, Sango was not.

"Kohaku," she said again, cautiously, as she stepped forward to stand next to Miroku. "What are you doing here?" With each word, it sounded as if a knife were tearing through her heart; Kohaku gave no sign of hearing her words at all, much less of recognizing her.

Sango repeated his name and stepped closer to the boy, and away from Miroku; it was all he could do not to reach out from her. He yearned to hold her back, knowing that this would only cause her pain, but knew it would hurt her more to be kept away from her brother. All Miroku could do was let her go, and hope to heal the hurt later.

Suddenly Kohaku looked up, his eyes as empty as ever, and asked, "Who are you?"

He had looked wrong, almost boneless or puppet-like, before. Now he snapped to attention as if suddenly coming to life, and looked ready to bolt at any moment. Sango made an anguished sound at her brother's apparent failure to recognize her, and Miroku knew that it would be his job to stop the boy if Kohaku should try anything.

He sincerely hoped that the encounter would not come to that. Not only did he have no wish to fight with Kohaku, but he knew that he would be unable to do much in his current condition.

"You have something of mine," the boy said, in a voice not his own. It may have been Kohaku's voice that spoke, but the words belonged to Naraku.

"I won't let you take that shard," Sango snarled. "And I'm not about to let you escape again!" Her grip tightened on Hiraikotsu's strap, though Miroku could not tell if she was planning to throw it, or use it as a shield.

An enormous blast of energy shot past just behind them, barely missing Kirara and Sango's stored pack, and tossing aside trees and vegetation as it passed. _The Wind Scar_… Miroku thought, absently, realizing that they must not be far from their friends. But if Inuyasha was already fighting something, he would not be able to help with Kohaku.

Kohaku took the opportunity provided by the temporary distraction and attacked Sango, lashing out with his chain scythe. She blocked it with Hiraikotsu, then tossed the large bone aside and drew her sword; the blade was far more battered than Miroku remembered, as if she had not been taking care of it lately.

She charged at Kohaku with a wordless shout of rage, knocking aside the chain scythe when he threw it at her, and deliberately tangling her sword in the chain so as to pull it out of his grip. For his part, Miroku hung back, knowing that the best way to help was to stay out of Sango's way until he found a good chance to intervene. He had to trust that she knew better how to deal with her brother than he did.

Kohaku scrambled, retrieving the the chain scythe and pulling hard on the chain. It had looped around Sango's arm, and the pull not only yanked the sword from her hand, but threw her to the ground. She hit the ground hard, tangled in the chain, and Miroku ran to her side to assist her.

"Don't worry about me," she hissed, "Make sure he doesn't get away!"

Miroku did not point out that he was nowhere near fast enough to catch the boy. From somewhere behind them, Kirara snarled.

She was standing in Kohaku's way, blocking his path to Sango's pack, where the jewel shard was hidden, but the effort was half-hearted. Like Sango, she had no desire to harm Kohaku. He slipped past her with little effort and plucked the shard from Sango's back before taking off toward the village, following the path cleared by the Wind Scar moments before.

"Kohaku!" Sango grabbed Hiraikotsu and ran after her brother without a second thought. Miroku and Kirara could only follow in her wake. Both were afraid of what might happen if Sango should catch her brother, and what would happen if she did not. Nothing good could come of this, of that Miroku was certain.

_What is Naraku up to?_

Whatever it was, he obviously wanted their group split up. Miroku counted it as a blessing that Kohaku had gone in the direction where they would most likely find Inuyasha and Kagome.

After following the path left by the Wind Scar, they came to a clearing that had apparently also been cleared recently by the same means. Inuyasha was there, facing down Kagura. And he looked none too pleased.

"What the fuck are you babbling about, bitch?"

As Kohaku slipped past the snarling hanyou, who barely missed grabbing him as he passed, Kagura drifted slowly to the ground. "Time to go," she said, boredly, drawing a feather from her hair. To Miroku's eyes, the display seemed somehow more fake than usual, as if her heart wasn't in it at all.

Odd…

The enchanted feather grew large enough to carry both Kagura and Kohaku, and they floated up and out of reach before their opponents had time to react.

Inuyasha swore.

As Kagura's feather drifted higher and higher into the air, Sango's fury grew. Miroku watched distantly, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by pain and nausea, probably from exerting himself too much, too quickly.

He heard Sango shout, "I'm not letting them get away. Kirara!"

The cat responded immediately, and they took off into the air after Kagura and Kohaku.

Miroku yearned to accompany them, to protect Sango from the pain of confronting her brother, but he knew he would have to let someone else go in his stead. He simply was not up to the task. He needed to sleep…

Dizzily, he realized that Sango and Kirara were already gone, and Kagome was demanding that Inuyasha go after them. He did not know where Kagome had come from, but he was glad she had appeared and was taking charge of the situation. Inuyasha was a good choice; the hanyou had saved Sango from herself in the past, and would not hesitate to do so again.

His vision swam as the hanyou disappeared into the forest, and he staggered once before leaning heavily on his staff for support. He was suddenly aware of the way the metal burned in his grip, as if previously dormant darkness were bubbling up inside of him.

This was not good.

He wanted to tell Inuyasha to go after Sango, forgetting that the hanyou was already gone; he wanted to warn Kagome that something was very wrong, but found he could not move.

The forest faded around him, darkening more and more as his consciousness was pushed aside to make way for something else.

Possession.

He'd been a fool to ignore the warning signs.

This was… not good…

 

It took Kagome half a second to decide what had to be done. "Inuyasha, go after Sango," she ordered. "Shippo and I can look after Miroku until you get back." When the hanyou looked about to protest, she added, "There's no telling what Sango will do if she catches up to Kagura and Kohaku. And with Kagura controlling the wind… I'm not sure she stands a chance against them in battle…"

"Keh, I'm on it. But you had better not get in any more trouble while I'm gone, you hear me?"

She smiled, and knew that Inuyasha would take care of Sango. "Go on. I'll have Miroku and Shippo with me. We'll be fine," she promised.

As Inuyasha raced after Sango, Kagome turned to the rest of her companions. Miroku was still standing, but just barely; Shippo was watching the monk, his expression a mix of worry and fear; the woman from the village was nowhere to be seen, though Kagome guessed she was still hiding in the bushes.

She would have to see to her friends, and then see if there was anything she and Shippo could do to help the villagers. It seemed a suddenly daunting task.

"Wh – What's wrong with him, Kagome?" Shippo asked.

"It's okay, Shippo," she soothed. She was beside Miroku in an instant, urging him to sit down and feeling for a fever. His forehead was hot, very hot, and he looked like he had been through quite a fight recently. "Can you bring me my backpack?"

"Sure thing!" Glad to have something useful to do, Shippo ran off to fetch her bag from where she had dropped it in the bushes.

Miroku squeezed his eyes shut and groaned. When he opened them, his eyes looked dull and lifeless. Kagome felt helpless. He looked beat up, not seriously injured, but he definitely had a high fever.

Maybe he was just sick. She wished that she had gotten the chance to ask Sango what had happened before getting split up again, and could only hope that Sango and Inuyasha would return soon.

Shippo returned with her bag a few minutes later. She was about to ask Shippo to dig out her first aid kit when she remembered something that her mother had given her: the box of condoms. Blushing furiously, she took the bag from Shippo and found the first aid kit herself.

She had always been reluctant to give too many modern things to her friends, and that included medicines. They saw her medicines as magical cures, and it did not seem like a good idea to rely on them too much. But if there was ever a time to use her modern medicines, this was it.

"Are you getting sick, too, Kagome?"

He must have noticed her blushing and, along with the sweat from the recent battle and the stress of taking care of Miroku and the villagers, mistaken it for the flush of fever. "No, Shippo, I'm fine," she protested uneasily. She pushed her embarrassment aside, knowing she would have plenty of time to dwell on that - at length - later. "Hey Shippo, what happened to that village woman that was with us?"

"She was still in the bush when I went to get your bag…"

"Well go see if she's feeling strong enough to come out here so I can see to her wounds," she ordered. She needed to give Shippo something to do so he wouldn't hover near her and drive her crazy while she was trying to see to Miroku.

With Shippo out of the way for the moment, she fashioned a makeshift pillow out of her sleeping bag and urged the monk to lie against it. She would have liked to put him to bed and let him rest at least until their friends returned, but with the village in ruin that did not seem to be an option.

But since she had time on her hands, she explained the thermometer's purpose to Miroku, even though he did not seem to care, and set about taking his temperature and scanning the labels of the medicine bottles her mother had packed, looking for anything that might help with a high fever.

She had a bottle of painkillers that she had used occasionally when helping to treat her friends' more serious wounds, but realized with chagrin that it had never really occurred to her that she, or her companions, might get sick.

She took the thermometer from Miroku, but it only served to confirm her fears. Frowning, she wished there was more she could do for him. Kaede would know what to do, but Kaede was days away. Her mother would know, too, but she was even further away than Kaede. She wondered if this village had a healer, or if anybody else had even survived Kagura's attack.

It was a while before Shippo returned, even though he had not gone far, but when he finally emerged from the bushes he was leading the village woman. Her tentative steps explained what had taken so long. Kagome knew she must be feeling confused and terrified in addition to her injuries, after being so suddenly swept up by Inuyasha, carried so swiftly, and then dumped into the bushes, all with no explanation of what was going on. If she had not known him so well, Kagome would have been scared as well.

Smiling, she said, "You're still bleeding. Let's get some bandages on that wound of yours, okay?"

The woman nodded nervously. But as she bent to retrieve her first aid kit… Kagome felt a hand slip up her skirt and plant itself firmly on her butt. Her eyes widened and she whirled around in shock, only barely managing not to slap the culprit, on account of his illness. "Miroku! What are you doing?"

 

Sango became aware, gradually, that Inuyasha was trailing them. _Kagome must have sent him_…

"You'd better not do anything stupid when we catch up to them, you got that, Sango?" he shouted, as if to alert her to his presence. Or to warn her that she was being watched.

_If I try to end this again, will you stop me again, Inuyasha?_ she wondered darkly. But instead of asking him that question, she simply nodded. Most of her attention was still focused forward, anyway. "Faster," she urged Kirara.

Thus far, they had been able to keep up with Kagura, but she doubted they would be able to keep pace much longer. She had to do something soon, or they would get away. Taking careful aim, and trying to account for Kagura's manipulation of the wind as best as she could, Sango hurled Hiraikotsu at them. She only hoped that Kagura would misjudge her target and assist her throw.

But instead of attacking, Kagura took evasive action and simply dodged out of the way.

"Please," she sneered. "You think you can stop me like that? I'm the wind. You can't use it against me!"

Sango caught Hiraikotsu easily on the return. She did not wait for a clear opportunity, but turned the momentum around and threw again. She made no pretenses this time, aiming directly for Kagura.

She knew she had let anger get the better of her, and that Kagura would dodge again and would most likely use her own weapon against her, but she could not help herself.

Kagura dodged again, sweeping low toward the tops of the trees; Kohaku leapt from the feather and disappeared into the trees, taking the jewel shard with him. Kagura waved her fan and tossed Hiraikotsu back, not at Sango, but at Kirara.

It struck, hard.

Sango grabbed for her weapon, but it slipped through her fingers.

Kirara howled in pain and shrank, returning to her small form.

And then they were falling out of the air.

Sango had never been afraid of heights, or falling, and did not even think to cry out at the suddenness of it. Or the knowledge that if she hit the ground she'd be dead or seriously injured.

But before she even reached the treetops, her fall was arrested and she found herself coming to the ground much more gently than expected. Inuyasha had leaped high in the air, springing up to catch her and Kirara before they could fall and be injured. _Inuyasha… I guess it's a good thing that Kagome sent you with me, after all…_

When they were safely on the ground, Inuyasha drew his sword and turned to Kagura. "Try that again and I'll kill you."

"It's too late," Kagura said, grinning in spite of the very real possibility that Inuyasha would carry out his threat. "Even if you kill me, it's too late. The seed of darkness has already taken root. You were fools to leave your friends alone."

"What did you do to Kagome, bitch?"

Kagura's grin shifted into a smirk. "Go find out, dog-boy. There's nothing you can do now anyway."

Inuyasha swore.

"Let's go," Sango said dully. "Kohaku's long gone. We can't waste more time here."

They delayed only long enough to retrieve Hiraikotsu. Sango let Inuyasha carry her on his back, even knowing he offered just as much to ensure that she stayed out of trouble as to give Kirara a break.

"You shouldn't feel bad about this," Inuyasha grumbled.

"I… I wasn't feeling bad about this." _I wasn't feeling anything at all…_

"You're a bad liar, Sango, you know that?" She stiffened as he continued, "I don't want you and Miroku running off like this again, got it?"

_Scolding me _now_, of all times…?_

"I'm sorry, Inuyasha."

"Don't be sorry, just don't do it again."

"I promise."

"Good. You better mean that."

They ran the rest of the way in silence. Sango was not sure what he was thinking, but she doubted it was good. She was startled by how easily he had accepted that she had "run off" with Miroku, and also that he had merely ordered her not to do it again, rather than yelling at her at length, or insulting her.

She wondered if perhaps Kagome was having a good influence on him, after all. When she first joined their group, Inuyasha would never have reacted the way he just did.

She did not quite realize they had arrived until she felt the rumble of Inuyasha's growl. Looking up at the angry sound, she knew immediately what the cause was, and felt her own heart seem to stop in response.

Miroku had pulled Kagome into a very intimate looking embrace, while Shippo and a village woman looked on in surprise and horror. For a long, awful moment, Sango had no idea what to make of the scene. Something seemed wrong about it. It wasn't like Miroku at all to behave that way toward Kagome; he knew she was off-limits, and he respected her as a friend and companion. So, why? Why would he do something like that?

Sango's heart pounded as she watched Kagome squirm and shove herself away from the monk as hard as she could. She stumbled away, a horrified look on her face. Miroku looked up then, as if finally aware of the intrusion.

Sango froze. His eyes were wrong. They were darker than normal, opaque, almost glossed over. It was like looking at a stranger.

Inuyasha summed it all up, in his typical fashion, with one angry shout that neatly missed the point. "Miroku, you filthy pervert, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"


	17. Chapter Sixteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Miroku grabbed Kagome again, pulling her against him with an arm looped round her neck, and reaching awkwardly around her to get at the beads that bound the wind tunnel. Kagome squirmed again but could not manage to wriggle her way out of his grasp a second time. His grip was too tight around her neck for her to move much. Still, she managed to get out a warning to the village woman, "Get out of here! This is dangerous!"

Kagome had no more breath to spare, but as the woman limped into the forest Shippo urged, "Run as far away as you can. We'll come find you when it' safe again!" He was clinging to Kagome's leg, terrified at Miroku's sudden strange behavior. Sango was glad he was clever enough to stay in a spot that would be safe; it was one less thing she and Inuyasha would have to worry about.

Sango felt frozen, helpless. The monk had to be possessed, or otherwise being controlled by some outside influence. But when had this happened? Kagura had said that the "dark seed" had been planted… was this what she had been talking about? As much as it galled her, this had to be it.

And she had a sinking feeling that she knew when it had happened; there was still a lot of time she was unable to account for during her fight with the vine demon. That Kagura had called it a seed seemed a good indication that it had come from the demon, especially since she had been the one to give it the jewel shard in the first place.

It was just another mistake to add to the ever-growing list, but this time she was determined not to let Naraku win. But all things considered, she did not have a lot of options if Miroku were to open the wind tunnel. If that were to happen, she would have no choice but to run away, and hope she could find some way to help the others later. She did not like that option one bit.

If Sango felt helpless, Inuyasha did not. He leaped into action, tackling Miroku to the ground, and prying the monk's arm away from Kagome's neck so that she could escape. His weight was enough to keep Miroku down and prevent him from accessing the wind tunnel or going after Kagome again. Sango had barely processed the attack when the hanyou shouted, "Get out of here! I'll take care of this idiot."

She hesitated. "He's possessed, Inuyasha. You can beat him up all you want, and it won't do any –"

Kagome touched a hand to her wrist. "Come on," she murmured softly, her eyes shining with understanding. "At the very least we can see if we can do any good at the village. Or find something to tie him up with until we can figure out what to do with him."

She had a point. Miroku was their group's expert in exorcism and possessions, even if he did spend more time being a conman than actually helping people. Sango was not sure they would be able to save him without finding a priest or priestess to help them. Kagome had some ability with purification, her arrows being proof enough of that, but with her lack of training she had no real way of knowing what to do or how to help. She could guess, but guessing could be dangerous.

"Let's go then," Sango agreed finally. She was reluctant to accept that she could do nothing to help, anymore than Kagome could. Even less, if she thought about it, for she lacked even Kagome's spiritual powers.

They stopped briefly to gather Sango's things from the clearing where she had abandoned them, and then proceeded to the village. Along the way she guiltily avoided taking the opportunity to tell Kagome what had led them back to this place, or to come into possession of a tainted jewel shard in the first place. There would be plenty of time for explanations later. She hoped.

When they arrived at the village, Sango was taken aback at the extent of the damage. "Kagura did this?" she asked, her voice quiet.

"Yes," Kagome said simply. After a pause, she added, "Sango, why did you and Miroku come back here, anyway?"

It was the question she had been dreading all along. She had hoped that this discussion could wait, that Kagome would let her bring it up when she was ready to tell, and that Miroku would stand by her and help her make amends for betraying their trust… but she should have known she would not be so lucky. She reminded herself forcefully that a demon slayer ought to own up to her actions, take responsibility for her mistakes, however numerous.

"I…" She faltered, despite her convictions, and opted to shamefully put off the inevitable, swearing to herself that she _would_ tell Kagome the truth, if not every little detail of it. "It's a long story, Kagome. Can we talk about it later?"

"Sure, Sango."

She did not miss the worried look in Kagome's eyes, and found she could not stand to look the other girl in the eye. Instead she focused on picking her way through the rubble and looking for survivors.

Before too long, Kagome caught sight of the village woman from earlier, and they approached her. She was at the head of a group of villagers, most of whom did not appear to be seriously injured.

She introduced herself as Yume, the innkeeper's wife. Sango barely recognized her in her frantic, injured state. Yume went on to explain which buildings had been damaged or destroyed, and which of the village men had been injured or killed. Sango listened only half-heartedly to the tale, leaving Kagome to deal with the wounded hearts of the villagers. She was a demon slayer, not a priestess, and inexperienced when it came to comforting people; ordinarily her extermination services were comfort enough.

Two men had died, but the rest of the villagers had escaped into the forest and avoided most of the onslaught. That did not change the fact that Kagura had destroyed their village and their livelihood, and all for what? Some plot of Naraku's? It was small consolation that they had foiled whatever scheme he had dreamed up, and she knew that would bring no solace at all to the villagers whose lives had been ruined.

She waited until Kagome had spoken with each of the villagers, marveling at how easily the other girl slipped into the role of priestess despite her lack of training, before approaching Yume, who appeared to be their leader.

"If you need help rebuilding," Sango offered.

"There is no need," Yume interrupted, her voice cold. "All we ask is that you leave, and do not return. You bring only trouble."

Remembering the warm welcome she and Miroku had received upon their initial return, and the kind treatment they had been given throughout their stay, Sango felt awful. How quickly things could change.

Kagome looked taken aback, too, but made no comment as they beat a hasty retreat from the village.

 

They ended up using a length of red silk, a spare obi that Sango kept with her in case of damage to her armor, to bind Miroku's hands. She was surprised to see that he was still relatively intact, considering he had been left in Inuyasha's care for some time while she and Kagome dealt with the villagers.

Sango left the task of securing the monk to her companions; she could not even bear to look at him in his current state. There was something terrifying about his eyes. They were so empty and cold, so very like her brother's. If he was now going to be under Naraku's control... she had to fight back tears at the thought, and turned her mind elsewhere, away from her fears and toward more useful pursuits.

The more she thought about it, the more she realized that all of this had been one big, elaborate plan that Naraku had hatched. Even from the very beginning, when she was first kidnapped by the demon, it had been leading up to this. The ultimate goal had been the death of Inuyasha and Sango, and apparently to capture Kagome. She did not imagine Miroku would have been allowed to live for long after fulfilling his duty of bringing Kagome to Naraku.

That man, no, that _thing_ would stop at nothing to get what he wanted. Sango fumed.

She refused to be used like this. She was not going to be bait in some trap, and she refused to be cowed by Naraku's use of her loved ones against her.

While Kagome and Inuyasha dealt with the monk, Sango carefully gathered up Kohaku's chain scythe and stored it in her pack. She had thought before that she would leave it behind, but now that she had the luxury of a little time found that she did not want to simply abandon a memento of her brother.

No, she would carry it as more than just a memento. It was proof of her resolve, just as much as Miroku's staff, which she now carried as well. Proof that one day its owner would be free to carry it again.

"We're ready," Kagome said gently from somewhere behind her.

"Okay." Sango took a deep breath and turned to her friends.

"Where are we going to go?" Shippo asked suddenly, startling the others with his sudden outburst. He had been so quiet that Sango had practically forgotten he was with them; she wondered if something else was going on that she was unaware of, or if he was simply scared and worried by the situation with Miroku.

Their best bet would be to search for someone that could exorcise Miroku, or at least purify whatever it was that was controlling him.

"We'll go to Mushin's," Kagome decided, after a moment of thought. Sango had been about to suggest the same thing. If anyone would know how to handle Miroku in a situation like this, it would be the man who raised him.

"Mushin's? Do you really think that old drunkard can do anything to help?"

Kagome frowned. "He's patched up the wind tunnel before, hasn't he? He can help us with this, too."

Inuyasha had a sour look on his face, but he didn't argue with the decision. "I'll take the lecher. Kagome, you ride with Sango and Shippo on Kirara. And don't get too close."

Miroku had been oddly quiet since Inuyasha had subdued him, but none of the others doubted that he would make a move again if given the chance.

They needed to help him, and fast.

With that in mind, none of the others complained about being forced to keep away. Not even Sango doubted the wisdom of that judgment, though it pained her to be so useless. Her one consolation was that flying on Kirara gave her a good viewpoint from which to keep an eye on Inuyasha and Miroku.

She only hoped that Kagome and Shippo would leave her in peace for a while, so she could begin to collect her thoughts.

 

As she and Sango drifted along, well behind Inuyasha and Miroku, Kagome stayed quiet. Judging by the other girl's withdrawn demeanor, she figured it would be best to let Sango have a little space. Her attempt to pry the story out of her at the village had been a mistake, and she did not intend to make such a mistake again.

She swore to be more patient in the future. Sango had always been slow to open up, and there was no reason to think that this situation would be any different.

She had just been so eager to believe it was nothing, or that her friends had somehow known about the jewel shard when she had not, that she had been unable to resist asking… And that was because she was sure the whole thing was no big deal.

She hung her head. That wasn't it at all, if she were brutally honest with herself. She had just been curious. She could think of a hundred different reasons for Sango to run off with Miroku and turn up days later with a jewel shard, and she wanted to know which one it was. And she had let that curiosity take precedence over her friend's well being, even for a minute. It was inexcusable.

_I'm sorry, Sango,_ she thought, but could not find voice for the words.

It had been a long time since anyone had said anything, and though the silence was enough to drive her nuts, she could think of nothing to say to any of her companions. Even Shippo was uncharacteristically subdued. He did not even complain when she squeezed him too tight, just looked up at her with a worried expression on his face. In the silence, she even missed Inuyasha's constant grumbling.

She was grateful when Inuyasha finally stopped and gave the signal that they would be making camp. It had been dark for over an hour, and Kagome was exhausted. First the journey, then the fight, and then more endless traveling… it had worn her out. She was looking forward to curling up in her sleeping bag for the night. But most of all, she was glad to finally have something to do.

Ordinarily Inuyasha would have taken advantage of the nearby stream for fishing, but he refused to turn any of his attention away from the possessed monk, so they had to make do with ramen and potato chips for dinner.

After dinner, as Kagome and Shippo were cleaning up and Inuyasha was grumbling about having to keep an eye on the monk, Sango wandered off a ways and sat beside the stream, staring into space. That in and of itself was not unusual. Kagome knew by now that Sango was a very private person, and when she was upset she would go off on her own, and return when she was feeling better.

Kagome left her alone, but grew more worried as the night wore on. Usually it was Miroku who would comfort Sango when she was feeling melancholy like this, but he was in no condition to do so and Kagome couldn't just let her friend be miserable.

Mustering as much courage and patience as possible, she headed toward the demon slayer.

 

Miroku was only vaguely aware of what was going on around him. His existence had shrunk to a constant and exhausting battle with the darkness that surged within him.

It had taken him a long time to regain this much awareness, and it was a constant struggle to maintain. He could not spare enough energy to tell his friends what was going on, or what they ought to do, but he once caught the name "Mushin" in their discussion and breathed a tentative sigh of relief.

Mushin would know what to do. If he wasn't too drunk to be of any use. He had better not be too drunk to be useful.

In the meantime, Miroku concentrated on meditating, working to keep the dark aura contained lest he lash out again.

Bolstering his resolve with thoughts of his friends, and especially of Sango, he hoped he could hold out until he could be purified. If he lost control and one of his friends was injured, or worse, he did not think he could live with himself.

 

"I think it was a warning," Kagome said suddenly.

Sango looked up, blinking rapidly. She had been staring at the water for some time, effectively ignoring everything around her. They were making good time and would probably arrive at the temple within the next day, but she felt worried and restless and had been unable to remain at camp. She craned her neck to look up at Kagome, squinting in the darkness. "What was a warning?"

"Miroku grabbing me," the other girl continued, moving to sit beside her.

"What do you mean?"

"He didn't look good, and he had a fever. It was like he kept getting worse and worse, and then he grabbed my butt." Kagome frowned. "I think he was trying to tell me that something wasn't right, and I needed to get away or find Inuyasha."

Sango laughed a little at that. "You think he wasn't just being a perv?"

"Nah. He might have done something like that a long time ago… but now it just seems weird. Especially because of the way he went for the wind tunnel after he grabbed me… Something's up, I know it."

"Maybe you're right." She got the impression that Kagome was trying to lead the conversation, but she wasn't willing to bite just yet.

"Please don't think that he was betraying you," Kagome urged. "He wouldn't do something like that."

"I don't think that," Sango protested. It actually had not occurred to her at all that he would do something like that of his own volition. She blinked. When had she stopped doubting him?

"And please… don't blame yourself. It isn't your fault that this happened."

"I can't help it. I've done so many things I shouldn't have done…" Miserably, she added, "I don't even remember how it started, Kagome."

"What do you mean?"

"All I know is what he, the monk, told me afterward," she explained. "I don't remember much from the night I was kidnapped, and what I do remember is so hazy…"

Kagome waited in silence for a long time; after a while, apparently realizing that Sango was uncomfortable with the topic and unlikely to start talking on her own, she prompted, "Well, what _do_ you remember?"

"I don't know… I remember going to the village, and a feast in our honor. But nothing really after that until the monk showed up and woke me up in the demon's lair. He put ofuda on me, and that's when I start remembering what happened."

"And that's when you killed the demon, and," Kagome filled in, "we went on our way." She gave Sango a critical look. "I take it that's not all?"

"It didn't stop, Kagome. It got worse. The remembering, I mean."

"Sango…"

"I started having nightmares, every night. Remembering what happened, but it was different every time. I don't know what _really_ happened, even now." She paused for a few deep breaths, but knew if she stopped now she would lose her nerve. If that happened, she did not know if she would ever be able to tell Kagome the truth… even if she did not plan to tell the entire truth. "Even before we fought the demon in that village… I started _doing_ things."

"Doing things?"

Sango felt her face grow warm. It took all of her resolve to force the words from her mouth. "Yes. Like watching… things I shouldn't. Wanting to do improper things."

"This has something to do with Miroku, then," the other girl said. She almost sounded excited. Sango had no idea how she could be excited about something as embarrassing and unsettling as this, but nodded cautiously.

"I'd catch myself watching him, daydreaming about," her voice grew quiet, even though she willed herself to keep going, "sex."

"There's nothing wrong with that, Sango. You love him, right?" She ignored Sango's rapid denial, knowing it for the embarrassed lie it was. "Then there's nothing wrong with it."

"It's not right!" Sango burst out. Horrified both at the vehemence in her voice and at the prospect of confessing _everything_ to Kagome, she clapped her hands over her mouth. She hadn't honestly meant to tell the other girl every last detail, just to give enough information to explain the source of her turmoil. But it had been a long time since she had a chance to speak openly with her friend, and the urge to do so was strong.

Kagome gave her an interested look, but remained silent while she struggled to regain her composure. She hated feeling so conflicted.

"It isn't right to spy on someone else during their private moments," she murmured finally, her face heated and, she was sure, bright red. "Like when they are bathing or, or…" She fumbled and couldn't say it. It was all she could do not to hide her face. "Like that stupid monk is always trying to do to me," she grumbled, as a last-ditch effort to explain.

"Hmm," Kagome said. "Wait a minute, you mean you spied on Miroku? When?"

She sounded about ready to laugh; Sango did not find the situation amusing in the least. "I – I don't know. The whole thing is very strange."

"You don't remember?" the other girl guessed, more accurately than Sango would have liked.

"I don't know," she groaned, rubbing her temples. The discussion was making her head ache. She should _never_ have brought this up, should have known better than to try talking about something so private with another person. "I remember things happening one way, and then later I'll remember them happening completely differently. It's hard to tell what's real and what isn't."

She looked to Kagome, expecting skepticism, and saw only curiosity and understanding in the other girl's eyes. She should have known better than to doubt Kagome, and felt a little foolish for thinking she would ridicule her. If anyone would understand, it was Kagome.

"It kept getting worse and worse," she explained. "As we put more distance between us and this place, the dreams got more intense and everything started getting more and more muddled in my head… And… I guess I wasn't the only one."

Taking a deep breath, she told Kagome the rest. As the words started to pour out of her, she found herself telling Kagome all that she could remember, including the parts that made her blush with shame, or stumble over muddy memories. She told Kagome about the nightmares, and how they had only ceased when she and Miroku returned to the village where everything had started. She even told Kagome how Miroku had convinced her to lie to Kaede, and how she had gone along with his plan, and the way guilt had eaten her up inside ever since. She even told Kagome about the sudden and strangely powerful memories of spying on Miroku, or wanting to lay with him... about how she had lied to Miroku and tried to fight the demon alone, and had almost gotten them both killed.

For her part, Kagome said little, asking questions to clarify as necessary, but mostly just lending a sympathetic ear. When she was done, Sango felt raw inside. "Can you ever forgive me?"

"Of course I can, Sango! There's nothing to forgive!" Quietly, Kagome added, "I only wish I could have helped you… You shouldn't have had to go through all that alone."

Sango thought about pointing out that until quite recently she had had Miroku beside her through the entire ordeal, but opted to focus on her friend's worrying self-blame. "Kagome, it's not your fault any of this happened."

"I should have noticed that something was wrong. But I was so preoccupied with my test and…" She seemed to think the better of what she had intended to say, and changed the subject. "I wasn't paying any attention. I didn't even notice that you were suffering. If anyone should be asking for forgiveness, it's me."

"Actually," Sango said, a bit conspiratorially. She was glad for the opportunity to change the subject - it was much easier to talk about anything other than what had been going on recently. "I'm proud of you. You're always working so hard for everyone else… but for once you did what you needed to do first. You've always said that this school thing, and these tests, are so important… We managed just fine."

Her voice wavered, slightly, at that.

Inuyasha had let the fire burn down, and by now it was so dark that Sango could barely see Kagome's face, but she did not miss the other girl's skeptical look.

"Sango, you look really upset. Are you sure you're okay?"

She had really hoped that Kagome would not be able to see how shaken she was by the whole conversation, and would let her change the subject or just drop the discussion altogether. And although she hated to admit it, Kagome was right. Fear and worry and shame still ate at her, freshly revived by her account of all that had happened.

"I'm fine. It's just," she choked. "Do you think I really did those things?"

Kagome considered the question for a moment. "I don't think you did." Her voice was so quiet that Sango almost didn't hear her. "You said that it was able to give you nightmares, and to guide your actions, right?" At Sango's nod, she continued, "Well, why not plant memories? Or try to make you do something you didn't necessarily want to do? Sango, if it could make you feel insecure and lose confidence, that would give it an advantage over you in battle."

Sango choked. "If that's the case… then how much of what I remember is real? The things I felt and thought and did… How much actually happened, and how much was planted in my mind by that thing?"

"It's all right, Sango," Kagome soothed. "The demon's dead now, and you both survived… And… I think… if Miroku says you didn't do anything dishonorable along the way, I think you can believe him."


	18. Chapter Seventeen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

The travelers did not even stop to eat over the course of the next day and, after pressing onward at full speed nearly all day, arrived at Mushin's temple shortly after nightfall. The temple was quiet and dark, so they approached with caution. There was no telling what might await them here. Even though they were weary from the day's journey, they all knew it was of utmost importance to find Mushin right away.

Inuyasha glared at the darkened building, where it loomed against the night sky. He dragged Miroku behind him and led the way into the temple, pausing just inside the main door. "Stay here," he ordered. "I'll take Miroku and find the monk."

Kagome and Sango glanced at each other for a moment before nodding cautiously. It was obvious that Inuyasha was not taking any chances with Miroku, not after what had happened yesterday.

As Inuyasha strode away, Miroku in tow, Kagome poked her head into one of the storage rooms. "Let's find some candles," she suggested.

Sango fell into step behind Kagome and Shippo as they headed into the storage room, but her mind was wandering. She wondered how Kagome could handle all of this so well; she had all but brushed off the fact that Miroku had tried to kidnap her, had barely even mentioned the way he had tried to use the wind tunnel on Sango and Inuyasha, and had taken Sango's embarrassed and confused account of the past few days completely in stride.

In comparison, Sango felt lost and out of control. She envied the other girl's composure. She might be able to put up a strong and confident front - she supposed that her slayer's training had not been _completely_ in vain - but her insides churned with turmoil. Fear, however well or poorly hidden, was always present: what if they couldn't save Miroku?

They searched for candles or lamps in the storage room, Kagome's flashlight cutting through only a small portion of the gloom. Sango reflected that, knowing what she did of Mushin, it would not be surprising to find the old monk passed out on the floor somewhere, sake bottle in hand. She sighed. If there was ever a time when they needed Mushin not to be Mushin, this would be it.

"Ah hah!" Kagome announced triumphantly, holding up two small candles procured from some cobwebby corner.

From elsewhere in the temple, Inuyasha's voice could be heard, cursing at Mushin and demanding that the old drunkard wake up. Sango headed toward the source of the sound, leaving Kagome to deal with the candles and their supplies.

It was not difficult to find them; in the time it took her to walk over, Mushin had lit a lamp, and a small circle of light surrounded him and the others. The scene was surprising. Inuyasha was astonishingly calm, describing the events that had led to Miroku's possession as best as he could based on what he had overheard of Sango's account, and in turn Mushin seemed shockingly sober. Miroku was as ominously quiet as he had been all day, but this time he was staring at her. His eyes glinted darkly in the light. She wondered what he was thinking, _if_ he was thinking, or if he was subsumed completely by whatever was controlling him, and had to look away.

"I will begin the exorcism right away," Mushin said.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Sango asked.

She thought she heard Inuyasha mutter, "Yeah, quit blaming yourself," but she could not be sure. What she was sure of was that the look the monk and hanyou exchanged could mean nothing good.

"If you would be so kind," Mushin began, in that ingratiating tone that often got him what he wanted - and made Sango fairly prickle with anger. "We will require food, water, and fresh sake when we are done here. Inuyasha has volunteered to assist with the exorcism, but if you would take care of the rest… it would be appreciated."

Sango bristled. It was all she could do not to scream at Inuyasha. He had to be the one that had suggested keeping her out of the exorcism... How could he just send her away like some useless, misbehaved child? She needed to help, to know that Miroku would be okay. And he would not even let her watch.

Knowing it was pointless to argue with Inuyasha, who looked about read to throw her out by brute force if necessary, and was more than strong enough to do it, Sango grabbed the water bucket from the corner and left. As she fled, she tried desperately to convince herself that Inuyasha was just trying to protect her, and not motivated by some supposed shortcoming on her part, but it did little to assuage the urge to lob the damned bucket at his head.

 

It had been strangely difficult to avoid flinching when Inuyasha saw the pain and anger in Sango's eyes after being asked to waste time with menial chores while he and Mushin saw to the exorcism. But somehow he had managed to steel himself to apparent indifference, even when his ears wanted to droop with shared pain.

He knew that she was likely to be even more hurt if she stuck around for the exorcism and things got ugly. He wouldn't put it past Naraku to have one last trap in store, or to attempt to use Miroku to target Sango again. She had been hurt enough lately; he would not let it happen again. Not on his watch. And he was not about to let the monk do something that stupid, either.

He turned his attention back to the monk, subconsciously tightening his grip on Miroku as he did so. Mushin actually seemed to know what he was doing. Once Sango departed, he set to work straight away. He readied a second lamp in case the first one should run low on oil and began preparing a number of scrolls that, Inuyasha assumed, would be used to expel whatever was inside Miroku.

"Make sure you hold him still, Inuyasha," the monk murmured.

"Yeah, yeah, I got him." He peered skeptically at Mushin. "You done already?" At the monk's nod, and swig of sake, he added, "That's it?" He had never paid much attention to Miroku's so-called exorcisms before, always assuming that there was no truth in Miroku's claims of demonic possession.

"If this doesn't work, there are other methods that may be tried."

"Yeah, whatever. Just fix him." Inuyasha honestly tried his best to be patient while Mushin murmured some sort of chant and began placing the fresh scrolls at various points along Miroku's body, but he was getting fed up with having to hang onto Miroku all the time. The sooner they got this taken care of, the better. They would be able to return to their quest to find the jewel shards and destroy Naraku - who deserved a painful, lingering death even more for this latest scheme.

Mushin finished with his chant and placed the last scroll against Miroku; it stuck and gave off a faint smoldering scent. Inuyasha's nose twitched.

"That should just about do it," the old monk commented. "You may release him now. He should be immobilized by the scrolls until the evil has been dispersed." A moment later, he added, "Whatever this is, it's strong, and it's not quite like anything I've seen before."

A nasty smell started coming from… somewhere. Inuyasha blinked in surprise. Miroku was emanating a dark aura, almost like one of Naraku's miasmas. Suddenly, he collapsed, more of the miasma leaking from his mouth. The flow slowed to a trickle and stopped altogether a few beats later. Inuyasha managed to catch him before he could hit the ground, but for a moment the hanyou was speechless.

"You sure you did that right?" he asked finally, with a glare in Mushin's direction. The monk did not seem to notice; all of his attention was focused on Miroku.

Inuyasha kept glancing toward the door. It seemed like Sango had been gone an inordinately long time. With Miroku's life at stake, he would have thought she would at least try to hurry. It was not like her to dawdle in any case; he had to wonder if excluding her had hurt her feelings more than he had thought it would.

Almost as suddenly as he had collapsed, Miroku blinked his eyes rapidly, and the dark aura in the room disappeared completely. Inuyasha eased him to the floor, onto the mat Mushin had been sleeping on.

"Water," he murmured.

"Sango's getting water," Inuyasha told him.

"Sango… is she safe?"

"Keh. Everyone's safe. No thanks to you, moron."

"Sorry." Miroku groaned. Inuyasha frowned. Something wasn't right. The foul smell from earlier lingered, even if the dark aura did not. Miroku's breathing was light and fast, and it almost looked like he was feverish and sweating. With another groan, he lost consciousness.

"Hey, what the hell's wrong with him? I thought you said you did it right, old man."

"This is not a possession, Inuyasha," Mushin said, the slightest touch of caution in his voice. "The dark aura has gone. If I'm not mistaken, this is poison."

Poison? That would explain the stench, but if it was poison, the situation was much more dire than they had thought. And how the hell had Naraku managed to get poison into Miroku and not have it affect him until he was purified? Sneaky bastard…

And that reminded him of something else.

"Where the hell is Sango? She should have been back by now," Inuyasha growled.

"She may have had difficulty finding the well -"

"She's been here before... she's not that stupid. I'll find her. You stay here with that idiot, and make sure he doesn't die or anything like that," Inuyasha snapped. He bounded from the room with one last backward glance. _Miroku, you better not die, you idiot!_

 

Sango stormed out of the temple, wooden bucket in hand. She did not recall exactly where the temple well was, but she was determined to find it and return as quickly as possible so she could upend the bucket over that damn hanyou's head. Kagome noticed her agitation and came running after her, leaving Shippo and Kirara to their own devices inside.

"Sango, wait!"

She slowed down, but just a bit, so the other girl could catch up. "What happened back there?"

"They sent me for water. Inuyasha doesn't want me around during the exorcism." Logic told her that it was a bad idea for her to be nearby during the process, for any number of reasons. None of that changed the fact that she was desperate to help in any way she could… But preferably in a way that was more meaningful than making sure everyone had water and food for after the deed was done.

"He's trying to protect you, you know," Kagome said quietly.

"I know." Sango's voice was sullen, even to her own ears. "But I don't need him to protect me." Except that she sometimes did, and more often than she would prefer to admit. Still, after all they had just been through, she did not think she needed to be protected from Miroku. She wanted to be beside him, not sent on stupid errands to keep her out of the way.

"Sango, I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do with what's happened lately. Inuyasha isn't like that. He just doesn't want to see you get hurt…" She looked back toward the temple, and Sango could practically hear her thinking that Inuyasha had better just not want Sango to get hurt.

"I know," she said, her anger subdued for now. "But how would you feel if Inuyasha was in trouble, and we sent you away?"

Kagome was silent then, her expression downcast. "I'm sorry," she said, finally. "Let's go get that water and get back as fast as we can. I'll get some food cooking, too, so you can go see how Miroku is doing." Under her breath, she added, "I wish Inuyasha wasn't so pig-headed sometimes…"

They found the well with little trouble, and filled the bucket Mushin had indicated Sango should take as well as a second bucket that was lying beside the well. By the time they finally got back to the temple, Sango's temper had frayed to a few delicate strands. She was praying for some sort of distraction, and she got one.

When they entered the main room, Shippo was noisily digging through Kagome's backpack, looking for something.

"Shippo!" Kagome scolded, setting down her bucket and rushing over to pull the fox kit out of her pack. "If you want something out of there, you just have to ask!"

Sango wondered if it was just her imagination, or if Kagome was growing redder and redder. She waited until Shippo had made his plea for more candy - and had been given what he wanted and run off to enjoy it - before abandoning her own bucket beside the door and approaching her friend.

"Is something wrong, Kagome?"

Kagome let out an "eep" sound and jumped in surprise when Sango spoke; apparently she had not realized that she had been followed. "N-nothing's wrong, Sango."

With a sigh, Sango sat down, closing her eyes and leaning against the wall. She felt exhausted, drained… helpless. She had almost hoped that Kagome was concerned about something, just so she would have something to talk about that wasn't Miroku, or so she might have something to do to keep herself occupied. Something that didn't involve water or cooking, preferably.

"Actually," Kagome said, hesitantly enough that Sango opened her eyes to look at her, "Can I get you to hold onto something for me?"

"Do you mind if I ask why?"

Kagome blushed again. "It's… something my mom gave me, that I don't want Inuyasha to see."

"Oh, is it a gift for him?" Sango asked. "I don't mind keeping it for you."

"It's… not exactly a gift," Kagome groaned. "And it's not something a child like Shippo should see. Here." She pressed a smallish paper box into Sango's hands.

The description on the outside of the box included many symbols with which she was not familiar, but what she did understand made Sango blink. _Pleasure enhancing?_ "Kagome… what _is_ this stuff?"

"It's… birth control," Kagome admitted after a long pause.

"Birth control?" Sango blinked rapidly.

"You know… so I won't get pregnant if I…" her voice grew very quiet, "sleep with Inuyasha."

"Oh." Sango glanced nervously at the innocent-looking box in her hands. "I guess I can keep it for you, if you don't think you'll need it…"

All of a sudden, Kagome's expression went from embarrassed to sly. "You know, you could use some of them, if you wanted to."

Sango felt her cheeks heat; there was no doubt that she was blushing bright red. "No way, I could never do that!" she protested, shoving the box into her bag with what she hoped was a strong sense of finality. If Miroku so much as knew she was keeping such a thing for Kagome, she would never hear the end of it.

If Miroku even survived the exorcism ritual. If he ever returned to being the smiling, joking monk she was used to. He had been so serious and somber lately…

Kagome stood up suddenly. "Inuyasha… what's wrong?"

Sango hurriedly tied her bag closed, remembering that Kagome did not want Inuyasha to know about the birth control for some reason, and joined her friend. She had not heard the hanyou enter the room, and appreciated the warning Kagome had given her.

"Something's wrong with the monk," he said.

For a moment it felt like Sango's heart had stopped in her chest. "What do you mean?" she asked, her voice hushed with fear.

"Keh. Go see for yourself. Mushin thinks it's some sorta delayed-release poison, or something."

"Poison?" Kagome said, incredulously.

Sango was too busy digging through her bag to answer. She knew Midori's anti-poison remedy was in there somewhere… it had to be. She wasn't sure it would work on someone that had already been poisoned, but if Mushin's suspicions turned out to be correct, they had no other recourse.

Her fingers found the small vial and gripped it tight. Besides, if it would protect against poison, maybe it would be useful against Naraku's hell insects in the future. Provided Miroku lived through this.

_I can't let him die now. Not after everything we went through…_

Summoning hope and courage, she dashed through the temple. Her footsteps echoed loudly and ominously in the empty building, but she tried to remain undeterred. Behind her, Inuyasha and Kagome followed at a slightly less breakneck pace.

"You say he's been poisoned?" she asked Mushin. She had to consciously still her hands from shaking, and from gripping the vial of Midori's medicine too tightly. Mushin nodded, and she finally let her gaze drift over Miroku's form. He was pallid and sweaty, looking very much as he did after sucking Naraku's poisonous insects into the wind tunnel. She had to admit, Mushin was probably right.

She drew a deep breath. "I hope this works, then."

 

Miroku drifted in and out of consciousness. It was during one of his brief moments of lucidity that Sango managed to get him to drink Midori's anti-poison concoction. She settled near him and refused to leave his side, even when Kagome urged her to get some sleep.

She paid little mind to her companions, though Kagome and Shippo tried to lure her into conversation about the strange poison and its possible origins, or about Naraku's motive for targeting Miroku in the first place. Their theories grew increasingly wild, and oftentimes silly, as the night wore on, but Sango found none of it amusing. Midnight came and went, and the others left her alone after that.

It was sometime near dawn when Miroku's fever broke, and the effects of the poison began to dissipate. When his expression relaxed and his breathing grew deep and even instead of labored, Sango finally allowed herself to breathe a tentative sigh of relief.

The waiting had seemed interminable. She hated being unable to help, hated knowing she had done all she could and it was still not enough. But if Miroku was alive, that was all that mattered. The rest paled in comparison and fell by the wayside.

The arrival of dawn saw Sango still beside him, sleeping fitfully on the mat that Kagome had left for her, keeping vigil in her own way.

 

It was two days before Miroku felt recovered enough to get up and about the temple. Sango had spent those two days alternately watching over him or hovering anxiously outside the room in which he slept. He supposed it was comforting for her to be near him, even as he knew that her inability to help speed his recovery threatened to drive her mad.

She was a warrior, a woman of action, and it must rankle to have done all she could without definitively resolving the situation. She, he knew well, would rather fight a demon any day than sit and wait to see if someone she cared deeply for would recover. Even so, he needed to take advantage of time alone. Not just for recovery, but also as a precious chance to think without interruption.

He had realized, during the course of his possession and meditations, that he needed to reevaluate not only his relationship with Sango, but what he expected to gain from that relationship. Somewhere along the line, his desires had shifted from mere physical gratification to a desire for something more. He had been driven by frustration and lust, and somehow had wound up with something different. Something more. Somewhere along the line he'd forgotten about his own selfish motivations, and shifted to caring for Sango more for her sake and less for his own.

The wanting was still there; in fact it seemed not to have abated at all, in spite of the numerous delays in reaching his goal. But it was strengthened, somehow, just as his bond with Sango had been strengthened. He'd stood beside her as much as she would allow, and he liked to think that they had passed the test. They'd survived, at the very least.

Now they just had to survive the aftermath.

Which meant that what he needed to think about now was the best way to continue forward from where they had ended up. He was no longer certain that this was a good time to become more deeply involved with Sango. Too much was at stake, and distractions would be ever more dangerous until Naraku was killed. This latest ploy, as his friends had explained it to him, was proof enough of that.

As much as it galled him to admit it, he would have to set aside thoughts of making love to Sango, at least for now. They would be safer in the long run if they waited to consummate their relationship until after Naraku was dead and gone. It would not be easy, or particularly pleasant, but he recognized it as the necessary course of action.

This line of thinking was part of what had led to his taking several days to fully recover. It was dangerous thinking, and he knew of no way at all to approach the subject with Sango, who seemed more at ease with doing than talking. She had taken to their growing closeness as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and he did not expect her to take the news well when he informed her that they needed to back off.

Not that she was likely to take kindly to any attempts to further their relationship with their friends present, either.

He sighed.

It was always the same with her. Stuck between a rock and a hard place. The actual situation might vary, but it was always the same underneath. Dealing with Sango always required a light, careful touch, or else the consequences had the potential to be quite dire.

He smiled. But when she let him get away with it… the effort was more than worth it. And he had to laugh at that. He, the practiced womanizer, was thrilled with even the slightest of allowances from this woman. His world had truly turned upside down.

He was in such a daze that he almost did not notice when Sango slipped into the room, bearing his dinner. More watered down, almost burned soup, no doubt. He supposed that he could blame his lack of attentiveness on his slow recovery, but found himself distracted by her unkempt appearance. It was obvious that she had not been sleeping well, if at all.

"Sango," he said, the raw tone of his voice surprising him even as his sudden outburst startled her. "I apologize for making such a burden of myself."

She set down the tray, laden with a bowl of steaming hot - and predictably half-burned - soup, and forced a smile. "Burden? It's no burden. Actually, I've been grateful for the rest."

He knew that was a lie, and wondered momentarily if he should press the matter. She probably would not take kindly to such interference.

"Hey, uhm," she began, breaking the silence with her customary awkwardness. "Listen, I'm sorry I let this happen to you."

"It's not your fault, Sango. It's no one's fault. We had no way of knowing what Naraku was up to."

She looked so forlorn; he was quickly losing his resolve to put some space between them. He wanted nothing more than to hold her, soothe her until the hurt went away for good. But he couldn't do that. Not now. Not yet.

"I should know better," she said. He knew to keep his mouth shut just from the tone of her voice. She needed to let this out. "I'm a demon slayer. I should have known better than to go off on my own. I should have known better than to let one failure affect me so much."

She sighed and hung her head; her hair slid forward, hiding her face from view.

"You should get some rest," he said. She seemed to quiver, but said nothing. He had a feeling he knew why she was still upset. She wanted him to do more to comfort her. There was nothing he could say that would not hurt or insult her.

So, against his better judgment, he settled for the one thing that seemed to help lately. With some effort, he pushed himself upright and pulled her into a hug. She came into his embrace willingly, and held tight to him. He let his arms circle her loosely and contented himself with just breathing in the scent of her.

This could be heaven, if they could both just let it.

But they couldn't.

This had to be the last time. The last time they let their feelings get the better of them. The last time they let this, beautiful though it might be, get in the way. The next time it happened, one or both of them could wind up dead. He reminded himself that it had very nearly resulted in their deaths this time, but it didn't matter.

He didn't want to let her go.

But he had to.

It took him a long time to work up the courage. Gradually, he pulled away from her, letting his hands come to rest on her shoulders, keeping her at arm's length. He studied her for a long moment, memorizing the look of trust on her face, and the way she looked when she let him get close and let her guard down, because he did not expect to see such things again.

There was a raw look to her face. She wasn't crying, but it looked like she might. He steeled himself against it as best as he could and, with a deep breath, took the plunge before he could chicken out.

"We can't keep doing this," he said, hating himself with every word. "It's too dangerous. Until Naraku is slain, we cannot take the chance of being distracted at a critical moment, or worse. If you were to become pregnant…" He could not continue, horrified at the thought of Naraku torturing Sango while she was with child, least of all _his_ child, and it seemed Sango had heard enough as well.

"I… see. So that's how it is."

"I wasn't finished," he added, uselessly, as she rose to leave. Once, she might have stayed to hear him out. Obviously she was too unsettled - and hurt - to do so now. He sank back against the mat in defeat as she fled the room.

He wondered if she realized how hard it was for him to do the right thing, to just throw away everything he had so selfishly wanted.

Miroku sighed; he managed, somehow, to make it to his feet and staggered and wobbled his way into the temple common room. The poison may have left him feeling weak, but he had spent enough time abed. Right now it was more important to patch things up with Sango, if he even could.

 

Sango could not stand to stay, no matter that Miroku claimed he had more to say than just that. She had been growing increasingly tense and anxious while he recovered, and his insistence that they put their relationship on hold until Naraku could be destroyed was doing nothing to help.

It only served to dig up her freshly buried shame and insecurity. She felt inordinately lied to, even though she knew, logically, that her friends were not the type to lie to her, and wanted nothing more than to escape and hide for a while.

She needed time and space to think and collect herself, more than she had in a long time.

_So he likes to talk big, but he doesn't like a woman that shows interest_, she thought bitterly. _Or maybe it's just _me_ that he doesn't want. Maybe he's just been lying to make me feel better about everything. Maybe I did... do those things... And now I've ruined everything._

She choked back angry tears, summoned her resolve, and stomped into the common room. Kagome's eyes were full of worry, but Inuyasha looked stonily impassive, as if he did not even see her. She almost preferred his indifference to Kagome's overwhelming concern. Frustrated, she grabbed her sword and armor, and fled.

She might be angry, but she was not stupid enough to venture out into the forest even near a temple without some form of protection. With a worried chirp, Kirara hurried to follow, leaving Inuyasha and Kagome to watch and wonder what had happened.


	19. Chapter Eighteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

As he made his way through the temple, Miroku's thoughts were dark. Maybe the curse of the wind tunnel went deeper than just the hole in his hand, he thought ruefully. It seemed that no matter what he tried to accomplish with Sango, it ended up having the wrong effect entirely.

He frowned. Well, at least now he knew she was interested. If nothing else, he had accomplished that much. One question answered… how many more until he could even begin to understand the way her mind worked?

Slowly, he made his way to the common room, a room that might have been used for meditation and the seeking of enlightenment were Mushin not in charge of the temple, where Inuyasha and Kagome were waiting.

Kagome looked up as he slid the door open. "She already left."

"Ah. Thank you," he said, stepping back out.

"Say, Miroku… what happened?"

"Just a small misunderstanding."

He closed the door behind him.

 

The forest was peaceful. Dark and damp and quiet, save for the occasional birdsong or rustle as some small creature passed by, and the ever-present sounds of insects. This was a good place for a temple, Sango thought. It would be easy to meditate here, if only her anger would let her sit still.

She did not even know where to direct her anger. There were too many reasons for it. She was angry with Miroku, for wanting to put more space between them; she was still angry with Inuyasha for sending her on idiotic errands when Miroku was quite possibly dying; she was angry with Kagome for asking her to hide 'birth control' in her bag in the hopes that Inuyasha would not find it; and she was angry with herself for being so worked up over Miroku's suggestion that they back off and kill Naraku before getting too involved with each other.

She knew better than that. But, somehow, she had come to see him as a source of comfort during this horrible journey they were on. She felt that they had grown closer; she had trusted him completely. And, she grudgingly admitted, she had let that cloud her judgment. In the moment when he asked her to wait, she had actually felt betrayed.

The worst part was that Miroku was right. His argument made perfect sense. In a way, it explained a lot of the difficulties she had been having lately. She had been distracted and upset, and had let the situation get out of hand. She was letting might-have-beens and memories that were likely false get the better of her, even now.

When she was out of sight of the temple, she stopped to change from the yukata she had been wearing and into her armor. She looked back almost guiltily before slipping deeper into the forest. She knew it was a bad idea to go off on her own, especially when she was feeling so overwhelmed and emotional, but reminded herself that this area was safe, and mentally swore that she would stay close enough that Inuyasha could hear her shout if she ran into trouble.

A moment later, Kirara appeared at her side. Sango's sense of guilt ebbed. She just wanted to be alone for a while, away from Kagome's concern, from facing Miroku, from listening to Shippo babble. The forest's peace, and Kirara's silent companionship, was already starting to ease her agitation.

She kept walking, and found a likely clearing a few moments later. Everything was quiet and still, a welcome relief from the tension at the temple. She sat at the base of a tree, Kirara beside her, and simply watched the quietude for a long time. It helped, somewhat, to simply sit and watch and let her mind be empty. But the peace did not last long, and the forest did little more to soothe her.

She itched to move.

She took a deep breath, trying to keep her calm, before deciding that it might be best if she did move. If nothing else it would help burn off some of the pent-up energy inside her.

Aware of Kirara's eyes on her, she stood and drew her sword. She had begun her training ages ago and once might have thought her sword training embedded in the physical memory of sinew and muscle. But it had been a long time since she had the luxury of practicing, much less of working with a sword, or any weapon besides Hiraikotsu. Movements that had once been familiar now felt shaky. It was a miracle she had managed to inflict any damage with this battered sword, this awkward technique.

She silently resolved to take better care both of her sword and in her training, when a sudden sound caught her attention.

It was Miroku. He had brought his staff with him; it was the soft, familiar jingling of the metal rings that had alerted her to his presence. She was somewhat annoyed, but not surprised, that he had found her so easily. Of course he would know this forest. He had grown up here.

He was also the only one foolish enough to follow her when she was upset. Especially when he had been the one that upset her in the first place. The others always had enough sense to let her be, but Miroku just could not seem to leave well enough alone.

After a short pause, the only outward sign that she was aware of his presence at all, she resumed her movements. Let him interrupt, if he wished to speak with her so badly. But she found that for all her agitation, she could not maintain her anger. She wanted to forgive him, and to let him make things right. She wanted him to ease the turmoil inside her and dispel the fears that plagued her. She did not know if she could hide that, or if she wanted to hide it in the first place.

There was a clanking sound as he leaned the staff against a tree, followed by a chirp from Kirara and a long moment of silence.

"Sango."

She turned slowly, her gaze dispassionate. She wondered how much he could see in her eyes, in spite of her attempts at indifference. Her grip tightened on her sword as if she could find strength in it.

"Sango, I'm sorry."

She could not look at him without betraying something, and cast her gaze upon the ground at his feet instead. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

He stepped closer, bridging the distance between them. He was close enough to touch her, but made no move to do so. "I never thought that you would run... if I tried to take things slow."

"I - That was my fault. With everything that's happened, I overreacted, and I wasn't thinking straight, and -"

"It is my fault, Sango, for not understanding that you need my support just as much as I need yours. We must stand together if we are to succeed… and I think, now, that I was going about it all wrong." He pulled her, gently, into his embrace; she realized that he was giving her time... to hit him, to run away, to at least utter some sort of protest. But she chose to do none of those things, and let him hold her instead. After what he had said earlier, she had not been sure he would ever hold her like this again.

That thought, deep down, had terrified her. For all that she tried to cover it up with anger, there were some days when she wondered, secretly, what she would do without him. To actually confront that possibility - and to realize that he would ask her to do so - had very nearly been more than she could handle.

He graciously ignored the fact that his presence had left her choked up and struggling to hold back the deluge of strong emotions that currently threatened to overwhelm her. He kept her gently pinned against him with one hand, while the other tilted her chin up so he could look at her. He was smiling. "But if we're going to do it this way, we need to make sure we know where we stand. Let's do this right this time, shall we?"

She blinked, her eyes blurring from tears she would not shed. "Huh?"

She only had a moment to wonder before he lowered his head and pressed his lips to hers. She clung to him awkwardly, with her free arm. No stolen kiss, this, but a _real_ one. Soft, and gentle, but steely underneath.

He held her tight enough, her body pressed flush against his, that she could not easily escape. And she did not care. She wanted more. More contact, more of the comfort only he could provide, more of the heat that had suddenly risen up between them.

This kiss had the strange effect of making her weak in the knees. All of her fear and desire and exhaustion, pushed aside and forcibly ignored for days, came flooding back; she very nearly lost her grip on her sword. At a second thought, she tossed it away, ignoring the faint clatter of the blade against the earth so she could wrap both arms around Miroku's neck and draw them closer together. The blade had taken a beating lately; another mistreatment could cause no more harm.

When Miroku finally pulled away, breathing hard and looking decidedly distracted, Sango buried her face against his neck and tried to keep the traitorous, _relieved_ tears from falling. For a long time they remained still, sharing the simple comfort of being together.

Sango started as Kirara trilled sadly.

Miroku pulled back further, scrutinizing her; she realized, embarrassed, that she _was_ crying. The tears rolled, hot and slick, down her face. She wondered, detachedly, if Kirara had smelled them.

"Don't cry, Sango," Miroku said, his voice low and deep, little more than a whisper. His hands trembled ever so slightly as they moved to cup her face. "You should get some rest," he added just as softly, "Did you think I didn't realize you haven't been sleeping?"

She wilted a little at that. She had been restless during his recovery, sleeping precious little, but she had expected it to pass within a day or so and had hoped that the others would not notice. If Miroku had noticed, that meant that Kagome probably had as well. Which in turn meant that she would not be allowed to get away with it any longer, so she may as well accept it and at least try to get some rest. But she found herself feeling reluctant to return to the temple. She did not want to have to explain her earlier outburst just yet.

His worried expression turned into a small smile. "You shouldn't worry about me so much," he said, a teasing tone creeping into his voice. She wondered if he realized that she would never stop worrying about him, and nearly flinched to remember the way she and Inuyasha had nearly let something terrible happen. If they had spent even a few more minutes following Kagura and Kohaku…

"You're worrying again," he said, interrupting her dark thoughts.

She tried to smile reassuringly, but could not quite manage it.

He released her, sliding his hands gently over her shoulders and down her arms to take her hands in his. The barely-there caress made her shiver; her cheeks were suddenly cold, without the warmth of his hands against them. And almost before she realized it, he was tugging gently, pulling her down so that she sat curled between his legs while he held her against his chest.

She sagged against him, grateful for the support, but she knew it could not last. Even the kiss had been going too far. This was dangerous. Miroku might be able to easily shift between denial and acceptance, whichever was more convenient, but she was not so flexible.

"We can't stay like this," she protested, her voice muffled against his chest. "You said so yourself."

He chuckled, and would not let her pull away. "I was wrong, remember?"

She laughed weakly at that, hardly able to believe anything anymore.

Miroku's arms tightened around her, holding her fast and squeezing gently. It was almost like he was past the point of allowing her to escape, she thought dazedly. She realized after a moment that he was talking, but it was difficult to focus.

"Sleep," he was saying, as if he realized that she was barely paying attention. "Then we'll talk, when your head is clear and you feel better."

 

There was a sound nearby, the slightest rustling of branches that drew Miroku out of a doze. It took him a moment to focus through the darkness. Red…

"Inuyasha."

"Kagome sent me."

"Ah. She was worried, was she?"

"You're an idiot, you know that?"

Miroku laughed softly. "Yes, I am aware of the situation."

"Good. Then you know better than to do anything that'll hurt her, right?" Inuyasha crossed his arms over his chest and did his best to look intimidating, but the monk was not paying attention. He was focused on the woman in his arms.

"Yes."

"Keh. Good." Inuyasha leapt into a nearby tree, but sat on one of the branches and leaned against the trunk rather than heading back to the temple.

Perplexed, Miroku asked, "If I may… what are you doing?"

"I know you, monk," the hanyou said, glaring. "You're in no shape to be out here chasing after her. Get some rest. I'll keep watch for awhile."

Miroku smiled. "Thank you, my friend."

He closed his eyes, but dozed only fitfully after that.

When he awoke sometime later, it was growing light. There was no sign of Inuyasha, but a small basket filled with something that smelled delicious was sitting nearby.

"Sango," he murmured. She stirred groggily. They had been here for hours, since it was now morning; she must have been exhausted. "Inuyasha brought us some breakfast, it would appear," he added smoothly, lest she be discomfited by their perhaps compromising situation.

Kirara was already investigating the basket and Sango, who did not seem bothered at all, slipped gracefully away from him to do the same. His own stomach gurgling, Miroku could not resist following.

Someone, probably Kagome, had prepared rice balls and steamed vegetables, with a small portion of meat that was clearly intended for their feline companion. They dug in, eating for the most part in silence.

"We should go back," Miroku said after the last of the food was gone. When Sango said nothing, he set about cleaning up their dishes and packing everything back into the basket.

"Wait," Sango said, just as he was about to rise.

Curiosity piqued, Miroku settled himself more comfortably beside her. "Yes, Sango?"

"I… Please, tell me what you remember from the past few weeks. I'm… I need to know."

He knew it was difficult for her to ask, but at the same time he felt immensely relieved that she had. He had begun to wonder if she ever would, or if she would let her fear of the truth rule her forever. It was obvious that something about the ordeal had her spooked; he only hoped he would be able to lay her fears to rest.

"What would you like to know?" he asked, hoping to narrow the list of possible topics down to only the most relevant.

"Everything." She looked downcast. "I've been… trying to get by on my own… but I don't think my memory is reliable."

"How so, Sango?" That revelation came as a shock. He had almost assumed that any issues with Sango's memory would be resolved once they took care of the demon that had been manipulating her. Obviously this was not the case. He had been a fool to miss her continued agitation, or to chalk it up merely to her skittishness at being alone with him.

"I…" She paused for a long time, as if considering what to say. "I think that the demon may have been manipulating my memories. I don't know, exactly, what happened or when… or if it even really happened at all." Her brow furrowed slightly.

He wondered what had prompted her to think that his recollection of events might be any more trustworthy than her own. There were certainly gaps in his memory, though he had to admit that most of those were due to his recent possession, while Sango's difficulty had begun the day of her kidnapping and had apparently escalated from that point on.

"It would be best to start at the beginning," he mused, half to himself. But when was the beginning? The obvious choice was the night of Sango's kidnapping, so he began there, even though Kagome and Inuyasha had been acting strangely for several days prior to that. He was fairly certain that had something to do with the demon's influence, perhaps more than just something, but judged it to be irrelevant to the current conversation. He wished to focus on Sango, not speculate about their friends.

"The night the demon took you," he began, "I heard you leave the inn…" He continued, listing events as he remembered them, but being careful to omit the parts where he had felt strong, irrational jealousy or lust, and to focus on the fact that, despite the demon's obvious intentions, Sango had done nothing shameful or dishonorable during her capture.

When he had finished reminding her that she had slain her captor, she interrupted him. "You are certain that nothing happened? My clothes were gone… I - you -"

He smiled as gently as he could. "You have asked me this before, Sango. The answer has not changed."

She seemed to consider that for a while. "I… I just wish I could remember for myself." Her voice was so quiet that he almost did not hear her.

"If I could help you remember, I would." And he meant it. It occurred to him that such an extended period of honesty should have bothered him. But it didn't. This was Sango… she deserved better than pretty lies and empty reassurances.

"I know," she said. She ran her fingers absentmindedly through Kirara's fur. "And after that? When we returned to Kaede's village… you knew I'd been having nightmares?"

He nodded. "Yes. When you slept, you were always restless. And it seemed to only grow worse as we traveled farther away from the demon's village."

"Did you… have nightmares, too?"

He hesitated for a moment, no more than the space of a heartbeat. "Yes."

"How did you know it would stop if we went back?"

"It seemed a logical conclusion," he explained. When each dream ended back in the demon's lair, and grew more forceful with increased distance… though he thought he understood her initial doubt a bit better now. She had attributed the dreams to her uncertainty regarding the events in the demon's lair, and to her perceived failure as a slayer, not to continued interference. Being less troubled by the kidnapping incident itself, he had come to the opposite conclusion without ever thinking that she might do otherwise.

"I suppose," Sango said, though her tone was doubtful.

"I believe you remember what happened after that," he prodded. Better to keep moving forward than to let her linger in doubt.

She nodded cautiously. He knew she could not have forgotten their days of fruitless searching for the demon, nor the battle at the tree. At least, he _hoped_ she had not forgotten those things, or the many moments of the course of those days that had drawn them together.

"Then I have a question for you, Sango."

She looked up at that, her expression somewhere between stricken and shocked.

He pressed forward anyway. "Why did you go to fight that demon on your own?" His heart still pounded at the memory of waking in the night to find her missing. He had to know what had possessed her to do such a reckless thing.

"It was calling me," she confessed. Suddenly, her uncertainty made sense. She worried, perhaps rightfully, that the demon had still been controlling her.

"I see," he said.

"I felt I had to deal with it on my own… to prove I wasn't a failure. I don't know if that was something the demon did, or…" Or her own wounded Slayer's pride, no doubt. At this point his guess was as good as hers.

He took her hand in his. "I'm glad you were uninjured."

She looked flustered. Not that he necessarily saw that as a bad thing. "I nearly failed again," she protested. It did not escape his notice that she had not yet pulled her hand away.

"The important thing is that you did not."

She nodded.

There was silence after that; it was almost the comfortable, companionable silence they had known in the past. And it was Sango that broke it, after realizing the situation and gently extricating her hand from his grip.

"But you did not notice anything weird before we fought that demon? Inuyasha and Kagome were acting very strangely," she said. Her voice was calm, with only the slightest tremor. It was the look on her face, both haunted and embarrassed, that told him that something was still bothering her. He guessed it had something to do with the days leading up to the kidnap, but had not the slightest idea as to what it might be. Unless, of course, the demon had attempted to place unchaste thoughts in her head the way it had with their companions.

"Nothing comes to mind," he confessed, hoping this would reassure her. His mind was already reeling with possibilities. What would Sango think of, that would cause her such distress? Had the demon tried to influence him, too, and he had simply failed to notice because lechery was his usual state of mind?

She frowned slightly. "You're sure?"

"Yes. Aside from some perhaps questionable actions on the part of our friends, I must admit that I did not notice anything out of the ordinary until it was too late." He paused a moment, considering her words. "But I take it you did?"

She flushed vividly red and shook her head violently; whatever she said next, he was certain it would be a lie. "No," she protested, "I am trying to figure out when we began to fall under the demon's control."

She obviously had noticed something odd before the kidnapping, but did not wish to speak about it. Which of course made him desperately curious to find out what it might be. In the interest of maintaining the peace, however, he kept his curiosity to himself… for now.

He stood, brushed himself off, and offered her a hand. "Come on. We've been out here long enough. I'm certain Inuyasha will want to leave as soon as possible." She took his hand, allowing him to help her up. He wrinkled his nose and grinned wryly. "Besides, it would seem that I, at least, am in need of a bath."

Sango laughed a little at that, and pulled away, reaching for the basket Kagome had packed their breakfast in and retrieving her discarded sword and extra clothes while she was at it. Kirara leapt onto her shoulder, though the slayer gave no sign of any unbalance, even with the sudden added weight. She smiled as she rose, as if oblivious to the fact that he had been watching her avidly the entire time. It was kind of her to ignore the indiscretion, even when he motioned that she should walk ahead of him.

He had hoped to follow behind her, but she soon fell into step beside him. Out of the corner of one eye, he saw her frown. "You _do_ need a bath," she managed, her expression comical.

He grinned. "Is that a hint that you would like to join me?"

"I will not join you in the bath!"

"Perhaps there are other activities that you would prefer, then," he teased. She whapped him over the head with the basket then, but not hard enough to cause any damage. "Ah, well, if you ever change your mind…"

He trailed off suggestively, but she only blushed and said nothing.

He was still grinning like a fool when they got back to the temple, but quickly sobered. "Sango, if you ever wish to speak to me - about anything - please know that you are always welcome to do so," he said quietly.

"Thank you," she murmured, pausing next to him. For a moment he thought to squeeze her hand, though he wasn't sure whether it was more to reassure her, or himself, but she was already moving away. When she turned to look back at him, she was smiling. "I'll remember that. Now go see about that bath. We can talk later."

 

Sango entered the common room expecting to be teased for her overnight absence, but only Kagome and Shippo were present. It was an oddly peaceful sight: the girl engrossed in one of her textbooks, and the fox kit busily devouring some sort of colorful, exotic treat. Sango was almost reluctant to intrude, but Kagome looked up as she entered and smiled brightly.

"Sango, you're back," she announced, her voice unwontedly cheerful.

Nodding, Sango took up a place near the other girl. "Where have Inuyasha and Mushin gone?"

Kagome shrugged. "They're off having a serious conversation somewhere, I think. I finally have a chance to study!" Sango peered into the strange book, but, as usual, could make little sense of it. "Say," Kagome continued, "did you talk things over with Miroku?"

"Yes," she said. Their conversation had helped, somewhat. There were still fears and memories that made her feel uneasy, but she felt less ashamed, and more confident that anything that seemed dishonorable had been planted in her mind by the demon.

"I'm glad," Kagome said.

Sango could tell she was nearly bursting at the seams with curiosity, but did not want to ask any potentially troublesome questions with Shippo present. Not that Sango blamed her. Shippo might look innocent, but he could be quite the little troublemaker when he wanted to be.

"By the way, where did Miroku run off to?" Kagome asked, drawing Sango out of her thoughts; Shippo watched them both, his eyes glittering with keen interest.

"He went to take a bath," Sango supplied. "He seemed to think he was well enough to leave soon."

"That's really good news! I'm sure Inuyasha will be glad to hear."

Sango nodded and lapsed into silence. She supposed he would be glad to be gone from this place. She knew that, for all that he tried to hide it, being at the temple made him worry about Miroku. She knew, because she felt the same way. The grave in the courtyard was an ever-present reminder of the wind tunnel's curse, and Miroku's limited lifespan. But at the same time, she was reluctant to leave. She would miss the peace and quiet, and the tenuous connection she had formed with Miroku, which she was almost certain would dissolve as soon as they returned to the road.

"Sango, are you okay? You look really worried." It was Shippo. He had finished his candy and had come over to play with Kirara, or so it appeared.

"I'm fine," she murmured, ruffling Kirara's fur in spite of a mewed protest. "Just thinking of the future. It's been nice to have a break."

"I hear you," Kagome said, setting her book aside and stretching until one of her joints popped. "Do you want to go find the boys? Inuyasha may want to head out as soon as possible."

Sango shrugged. "Sure." But something about what Kagome had said stuck in her head. Inuyasha _may_ want to head out as soon as possible? From what Sango knew of the hanyou, he would have to be seriously ill or wounded not to want to return to their quest immediately. If he did not… Sango got the distinct impression that Kagome was up to something. Perhaps her friends had found the privacy of the temple to their liking, too.

The temple was quiet. Sango had no idea where they would find Mushin or Inuyasha, but Kagome seemed to. With Shippo clinging to one arm, the priestess led the way.

They found the two men sitting on the porch. Both were silent; Inuyasha looked grumpier than usual, if such a thing were possible, while Mushin was gazing morosely at a mostly empty bottle of sake. Sango knew they had been talking about Miroku. Mushin had the most experience of anyone when it came to the wind tunnel curse, so it was only natural to discuss it while they were here. She wondered what the prognosis was this time, or if she even wanted to know.

It was Kagome that was brave enough to break the stony silence. "Inuyasha…"

"Keh." The hanyou turned to look out over the forest, rather than at the girls.

"Miroku said today that he felt well enough to leave soon," Kagome continued. "We can leave tonight, if you -"

"Feh, whatever. We'll leave in the morning."

The response had Sango blinking rapidly in surprise. Had she heard correctly? It made her wonder if Inuyasha had 'gone soft', as he often complained he might, or if Miroku was hiding something from her, or if it was something else altogether… maybe her imagination.

Kagome had been making small talk with Inuyasha while Sango let her thoughts run wild, but now the priestess turned her attention back to the slayer. "Well, if I've got all afternoon, I'm going to try to catch up on my studying while I've got the chance. Sango, why don't you go see if Miroku's done with his bath and let him know there's no need to hurry?"

Sango hesitated, hoping that Mushin or Inuyasha would volunteer, but both were silent. She sighed. "I suppose I can," she said, grudgingly, and hoping against hope that this would not end as badly as she feared it might.

"Great! Thanks, Sango," Kagome chirped, already heading back to her studying.

Sango sighed again, this time in resignation. Just what was Kagome getting at? She was halfway to the bathhouse, secluded from the rest of the temple, when it hit her: first urging her to talk to Miroku alone, then the offer of the birth control, now this. Kagome was playing matchmaker again.

She didn't know whether to feel flattered or embarrassed or -

"Sango, if I had known you were planning to join me after all, I'd have waited for you at the bathhouse," Miroku teased.

Certain that she was going to die of shock, having not heard him approach, Sango had the presence of mind to be glad that he was not still in the bath when she found him. If that had been the case… she might have died of embarrassment instead. The idea reminded her too closely of the one questionable memory that Miroku had not addressed – not that she had been brave enough to bring it up in the first place. She had no desire to spy on him again… right? Right.

"Is something wrong? You look… preoccupied."

"N - nothing's wrong," she protested, shaking her head violently. "Kagome sent me, actually. We spoke with Inuyasha, and he said that we will be leaving tomorrow morning, so there's no need to rush things today -" She realized she was babbling, and stopped.

He chuckled softly. "Okay, so nothing's wrong. But you are preoccupied."

He would see right through her if she tried to deny it; he always did. She could think of no excuse to give him, yet pride would not let her admit to the truth. Luckily, Miroku seemed more than willing to let that matter drop.

"Since we have suddenly found ourselves with an abundance of time, perhaps you should take advantage of the bathhouse," he suggested; she had not noticed how close he was standing, until that very moment. "It might help you relax."

She frowned, narrowing her eyes. "And if I do that, what will you do?"

"Nothing untoward, I assure you."

Her eyes narrowed just a bit more. "Why do I doubt that?" The thought jolted through her that even if she _had_ accidentally spied on him, for whatever reason, Miroku was more likely to enjoy her attention than revile her for it. She had been overreacting because it scared her to think she might act like him, that she might do something dishonorable or reprehensible. But what if it wasn't so bad?

"I would never think of doing something so dishonorable as spying on you in the bath," he was saying, having guessed her suspicions.

"Oh, spare me," she interrupted, fighting between the urge to roll her eyes or giggle.

"I would much rather join you."

She was taken aback by the sudden suggestion, and tried to hide it even though she knew she was failing miserably. Taking advantage of her surprise, Miroku stepped closer to wrap his arms around her and whisper, "If you would not be opposed, of course."

She was strangely unopposed, and that was the problem.

She could feel his breath on her neck as he leaned close. She thought he might kiss her; she _wanted_ him to kiss her. And when his hands slipped lower, grasping her buttocks and squeezing gently, she nearly lost her composure altogether. She had missed this, the feeling of his hands on her bottom, though the realization came with more surprise than horror.

When was the last time he had touched her like this? Struggling to clear her head, she scrambled for any excuse she could find to put some space between them.

"I should go do… something," she managed, but it was half-hearted, almost pathetic. She was hesitant to be alone with him now, when she was getting so worked up, yet she found herself unwilling to leave him. He looked so… serious.

He let her go without a fuss. His gaze met hers and held it. It was so intense that she almost could not look away. In comparison to her wildly scattered emotions, he looked the very picture of composure, but his words put the lie to that. "Stay here. With me. We have all night…"

"I can't," she fumbled, "Not yet." _But I want to. Please see that I want to._

"If you change your mind, you know where to find me." And then he was gone, heading back the way she had come. She hardly noticed.

Those eyes… and the lingering sensation of his hands on her… Her mind was very nearly made up before he was even out of sight.

Once he was gone, she let herself collapse against the wall and tried to ignore the fluttering of her heart and the pulsing heat between her legs.

_What am I going to do?_

 

"Sango?"

Kagome peered into the bathhouse, searching for any sign of her friend. After dinner, the monk and slayer had both disappeared, though not together, and nearly an hour apart. Miroku had returned to his room to rest, but Sango had given no explanation and, when she failed to turn up again within an hour or so, Kagome had begun to worry.

She was relieved to find Sango in the bathhouse, even if she was looking sullen and conflicted - and rather pruny.

"You _are_ in here," Kagome continued, trying her best to be cheerful. "Do you mind if I join you?"

Sango shook her head and moved over so there would be room for the other girl in the rather cramped basin. Kagome had not really planned on taking a bath just now, but she was not about to pass up the opportunity to talk to Sango away from prying eyes and ears.

She quickly disrobed and grabbed her bath supplies, stashed here since shortly after the group's arrival, and slipped into the water. When she managed to finish washing herself and still had not heard a peep from Sango, she knew that something had to be wrong. It only took a moment to decide a course of action.

"Here," she said, offering the bottle of scented shampoo. At Sango's skeptical look, she added, "It always helps me feel better."

Almost grudgingly, Sango accepted the offer.

"Now, tell me what's bothering you," Kagome urged. Sango frowned. She was obviously stalling. "Come on," Kagome prodded, "I'm your friend, Sango. If something is bothering you, you can talk to me about it."

Sango ducked under the water, washing the suds from her hair. When she surfaced, her expression was unreadable. "Miroku asked me to meet him in his room tonight," she said, her voice so quiet that for a moment Kagome thought she had misheard. Sango had used Miroku's name… and he had invited her… oh.

"Really?!"

Sango nodded. Kagome felt her curiosity bubbling over. "Well? Are you going to go?"

The slayer shrugged at that, and climbed gracefully from the tub. "I don't think so."

Kagome scrambled to follow her. "Why not? Did something happen between you two?"

"It's not that I don't want to… at least I don't think that's it."

"Then… what's stopping you?"

"I don't know." And with that, having finished dressing, she walked away. Kagome knew better than to follow, but she couldn't help but worry.


	20. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: _Inuyasha _belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.

Sango hesitated. She knew it was foolish: it had taken everything in her to get this far, and now she stood, just outside the door, unable to summon the courage to go in. She felt weighed down, both by the birth control tucked into the sleeve of her yukata and by her own words. Like it or not, she had turned down Miroku's proposition earlier. There was no guarantee that he would accept her presence now. Worst of all, she could not exactly blame him if he no longer wanted to put up with her.

She was well aware that she had done precious little in the way of encouraging him to show his affection for her in the past. Surely even he had his limits. What if she had pushed him past those limits? What if, what if, what if... an endless barrage of depressing and painful scenarios played out in her head, and not even a hot bath, an unsteady resolution, and Kagome's enthusiastic reassurance had been enough to fully dispel them.

_You're being a coward_, she thought. And it was true. She _was_ being a coward. Miroku was a patient man, and she knew, deep down, that he cared for her deeply. They would get past this bump in the road, somehow. All she had to do was take things one step at a time, and avoid getting too far ahead of herself.

After all, it was not as if she had not spent the night - entirely innocently - with Miroku before. And Miroku did not know about the birth control; Kagome had merely insisted that she take it as a precaution. If she only wanted to talk, or be near one another without going further, all she had to do was avoid mentioning that she had it.

Knowing that did little to quell the nervousness that rose in her belly.

Taking a deep breath and quashing her fears as best as she could, she stepped forward and slid the door open. Miroku glanced up at her, his gaze more curious than expectant.

It was dark in the room, the fire having apparently burned low long ago; Miroku was sitting near the back, as if he had been meditating. It was a small room, but the atmosphere was almost cozy. She felt suddenly like an intruder, an unwanted guest, and fought the urge to flee.

"Miroku?" she asked, hesitantly, almost stumbling over the unfamiliar syllables of his name.

"Yes, Sango?" He looked tired, resigned, and a little bit surprised. She couldn't blame him.

"I thought... I might stay with you tonight," she said. "If you don't mind, that is."

There was a long pause before he motioned for her to join him; she sat in front of him, curling her legs to one side and letting her hands rest in her lap, and found that it was suddenly hard to keep still.

As if sensing her agitation, he leaned forward and clasped her fidgeting hands in his. "Sango, if you're nervous or upset, you don't have to stay."

She pulled one hand away and held it up to silence him. "Stop." When he made no move to interrupt, she lowered her hand and continued, "Before I stay, we need to talk."

"I'm listening," he said, his tone careful.

She was determined not to let her nervousness stop her now, and plunged blindly ahead. "If I stay here with you tonight... and we do anything beyond just kissing," she faltered slightly but kept going, afraid she would lose her nerve, "there will be no other women, right?"

She knew it was the question he had been dreading from her all along, more so than any other: the requirement that he be loyal only to her before she would agree to be with him. It was the question she had feared for so long would be the deal breaker, the one thing that would truly tear them apart. Now, that fear had slipped away. It needed to be said, to be brought out into the open and confirmed, but she was no longer afraid of what the answer might be.

And as she scrutinized his face, waiting for an answer, she saw no signs that he was going to attempt to evade the question... only shock, followed by a quick succession of warring emotions that eventually gave way to his customary calm.

Finding his voice at least, he admonished, "As pleasant as that idea is, Sango, you know we cannot do that." As if fearing she might flee as she had the last time he turned her down, he rested a hand gently on her arm. "Hear me out, please."

She toyed uncomfortably with the sleeve of her yukata. This was the sink-or-swim moment. "I know what you are going to say," she said, her voice almost a whisper as uncertainty gripped her. "We cannot take the chance of bringing a child into the world, not now. And I... I understand that. I know that." She took a deep breath. "And... I would not be here if I did not accept that risk. And if Kagome had not given me something to prevent the conception of a child."

Understanding flashed through the monk's eyes, and something else, which might have been joy, or lust. She could never quite tell with him...

Still, the prolonged silence was worrying. She wanted desperately to know what he was thinking, and, more worryingly, was quickly losing her momentum and her nerve. Instead of giving herself time to focus and expand on her doubts, she asked, "Are you okay?"

He smiled at that. "I'm fine. Just... surprised."

She let it rest, giving way to an almost awkward silence. A thought nagged at her. "You still haven't answered my question."

"Sango, you're the only woman for me." His response, free of his customary guile, took her by surprise. For a moment she was speechless, unable to form a coherent thought. Had he really said what she thought she had just heard? It seemed impossible.

She had not realized just how close they were until he reached up and caressed her face. She leaned into the touch and sighed.

"I didn't think I'd live to see the day when you would come to me willingly," he murmured, a hint of wonder in his voice, "Or at least not pull away from my touch."

The comment took her aback for a moment. Had she really made him feel so hopeless? And yet he had never faltered in his pursuit of her. Gotten sidetracked, perhaps, or distracted, but never faltered.

"Sango." She startled badly at the sound of his voice; Miroku only smiled. His hand now cupped her face, the thumb brushing gently over her lips. The intensity of his gaze made her heart beat fast. Her tongue darted out of her mouth, almost of its own accord, to wet suddenly dry lips.

His eyes narrowed for a moment, and then he leaned forward, closing the distance between them and pressing his lips to hers. She nearly melted into the kiss, her fears momentarily forgotten amidst an embrace that was both reassuring and nerve-wracking. As he moved to deepen the kiss, she gave into the advance far more willingly than she would have liked to admit, relishing the heated movement of his lips and tongue against hers.

Time and space fell away, and for a long while her world seemed to consist only of the two of them. She threw herself into the kiss with reckless abandon, gratefully letting her doubts and fears slip away. There would be time for that later. For the moment, at least, they had _this_, and this connection was stronger than all the evil that threatened them. If only it could be like this forever...

The hand that had been against her face slipped back to support the nape of her neck, then snuck down further, cupping her butt and urging her hips against his. Sango snapped back to reality, Kagome's stern warning about proper use of the birth control echoing suddenly - and jarringly - in her ears.

For a moment she felt terribly disoriented. How had she ended up leaning so far backward, with Miroku nearly on top of her? Her arms were looped around his neck, her hands tangled in his hair, holding him close; her legs were coiled almost painfully beneath her to accommodate Miroku's sudden presence on top of her. She took a couple of deep breaths, trying to calm her racing heart.

Miroku watched her carefully, a faint smirk on his face. "Is something wrong?"

He was already pulling away, settling back where he had been sitting before, and giving her space to regain her composure. Awkwardly, she tried to explain. "No, it's not that. Uhm... well, the thing Kagome gave me... it's for you, actually."

He quirked a brow. "For me?"

She fumbled for a moment, then withdrew the small package from her sleeve and handed it to him. He took it from her without a word, inspecting it curiously. It looked innocuous enough; if she had not already known what it was from Kagome's explanation, she would never have guessed its true purpose.

"There are instructions," she pointed out.

By the time he finished reading the package, he could not quite keep the grin off his face. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

She squared her shoulders and met his gaze, determined not to back down. "Are you?"

"Oh yes." He looked, she thought, almost predatory. "Come here," he said, moving toward the pallet along the side wall. She let him take her hand and followed silently, her heart beating fast as he pulled her down with him and urged her into his lap. She moved carefully, easing her legs over his and around his waist, feeling a rush of expectant heat flow through her.

The yukata went taut around her thighs, preventing her from getting closer. Frustrated, she squirmed and hiked the robe up until she could straddle his hips better. He pulled her into a kiss, holding her close against him with a hand on the small of her back. The other hand traced a lazy path up her side before coming to rest against her breast.

Shuddering, having forgotten to breathe and finding herself suddenly very aware of his excitement, of the hard, hot length of him that was pressed between them, she broke away from the kiss.

"Sango... I -"

Before he could regain his composure enough to go on, she interjected, "I trust you." Three words that were, she realized, long overdue. Three words that changed everything forever. It was out in the open. She couldn't take it back. And even if she could, she didn't want to. For good measure, she added, "I don't want any more doubts."

The hand that had been against her breast dipped lower. He deftly untied the belt holding her yukata closed, letting it hang open. She felt a flash of self-consciousness at finding herself suddenly exposed, even though he gave no sign that he wanted her to remove the garment completely; the realization that Miroku was already working at his own clothing made her flush a deeper shade of red, but did not stop her from reaching to help him, pushing dark fabric out of the way once his robe had been untied.

His skin was marred by old scars... and newer bruises, dark and ugly purplish reminders of their constant struggle for survival. Her breath caught in her throat at the sight. She pulled away, already missing the close contact but needing a better look.

She needed to see what her foolishness had wrought. She needed to see it, accept it, and vow to do better in the future...

"Don't," he whispered.

"Huh?"

"Don't feel guilty," he continued, slipping behind her and out of sight. And then his hands were against her waist, the sensitive skin there shivering of its own accord at the unexpected caress, urging her back to rest against him, her back to his front. He looped his arms loosely around her, his hands brushing lightly against her hips.

"What are you talking about?" she managed, barely.

He slipped the robe off one of her shoulders and pressed a wet kiss to her suddenly bare flesh. "Don't feel guilty about the bruises. There are other things I'd much rather you stare at." She heard him only as if through a haze; she was caught up in the feel of his legs, strong and warm, on each side of her hips. His hands distracted her, moving to cup her breasts, his fingers expertly teasing the nipples to hard nubs. He pressed another kiss, and another and another, along the line of her shoulder until he found a particularly sensitive spot, which he laved with his tongue until she trembled in his arms.

An insistent heat was growing between her legs, demanding her attention - or his, it did not matter so long as the need for contact was met. She squirmed just a little, her hands fisting amidst the fabric of her loosened yukata. His legs, pressed close enough against her to keep her legs from falling open, tightened around hers for a heartbeat before relaxing again. She realized then, slowly, that he was teasing her: deliberately confining her, prolonging the moment, gauging her reactions.

"I've wanted to do this for a long time," he confessed, a heated whisper against her ear. She let out a shuddering breath that was half sigh, half moan as his hand slid down her belly to the heated, needy place between her legs.

She moved her hips greedily against his hand. It was clumsy, instinctive, but gratifying. His fingers, slick with her juices, slid deftly amidst her folds, working with her movements and wringing a climax from her almost before she knew it.

She slumped against him as the waves of pleasure subsided, breathing hard and feeling remarkably boneless and relaxed. "You should let go more often," he teased, resting his chin on her shoulder.

"I can't," she said, quietly. She had spent most of the last several months fighting for her life or worrying about her brother or Miroku. Even when they did have some down time, there were her weapons, which needed care, and her poisons to restock, and the chores Kaede needed help with. She could find a million excuses not to engage in such self-indulgent behavior, and, she was beginning to realize, Miroku would happily make her forget each and every one of them, if only she would let him. And he was making that idea a very tempting one, indeed.

"Once or twice is better than never," he pointed out. She did not want to ask how he knew so much about her private habits, or if he was merely guessing, and the idea slipped away anyway as he began to move his hand again, using a finger to gently toy with her clit.

"You would say that, wouldn't you?"

"It's good advice."

"For me, or for you?"

He did something wonderful with his hand that made her hips buck against him and tore a moan from her throat. When he spoke, she could practically hear the grin in his voice. "Consider it... mutually beneficial."

She did not respond then, was instead overcome by the sensations of his hand against her as he dipped first one and then two fingers inside her at the same time. She barely noticed when he moved to sit beside her instead of behind her.

She was well on her way to losing herself in his touch for a second time when he suddenly stopped.

The words "don't stop" died on her lips. She cracked open her eyes, almost afraid to see what the problem was; Miroku had a slightly amused expression on his face, and was holding the birth control package in the hand that was not otherwise occupied. "Help me with this?" he asked, "Unless you'd rather I stop and take care of it myself..."

Thoroughly distracted, and a bit irritated at the interruption, it took her a moment to process what he was saying. When she had finally made sense of it, she reached over and snatched the package from him. He laughed quietly, an intoxicating, husky sound, as she tore fiercely into the packaging and removed the device inside.

His fingers were moving again, teasing, _distracting_. She reached awkwardly for him, hindered by half-lidded eyes and the dim light as much as the pulsing pleasure between her legs, finally found his length and closed her hand around it. It was warm, and broader than she had expected, the skin silky soft over a hardness that only grew more rigid as her fingers wrapped around it. She dragged her hand up to the tip, eliciting a sound that was half gasp, half choke.

Her hands shaking slightly, she rolled the strange material down his shaft until it formed a sheath - the strange barrier Kagome swore would prevent the creation of a child. Sango did not have time to wonder about that, because no sooner had she withdrawn her hands, than Miroku was urging her back onto the mat and beneath him. She did not even mind that he had stopped working his hand between her legs; she opened herself to him eagerly, sighed as he settled over her and captured her mouth in a kiss.

He waited a moment longer, and then shifted, sinking his length into her slowly, deeply. It was enough to make her gasp. Miroku seemed at a loss for words. He shuddered, tried to speak once, and found his voice on the second try. "You're okay?"

"Yes," she breathed.

He moved, then, and she moved with him. They found a rhythm together, slow at first and then, deeper, faster, needier. Curtained by Miroku's robe, Sango felt safe, intimate. She held him closer, meeting each of his movements and wanting the closeness and certainty of this moment to never fade.

And then he was stiffening over her, reaching his own peak. She watched, fascinated, as he came tumbling down from it... taut strain giving way to deep relaxation and contentment. Such a powerful reaction... because of her. It was a heady thought.

Miroku smiled at her before he pulled away, and laughed when she averted her eyes, fresh color seeping into her cheeks; it would seem her shyness amused him. Her body had responded so easily to that smile, once again growing warm and eager with desire... but he was already gone, tying his robe shut and seeing to the fire. Uncomfortably, and feeling suddenly modest, she fidgeted with her own clothing and ultimately climbed under the blanket.

It took her a moment longer to realize that he was simply disposing of the birth control; he returned to her side as soon as he was done. He was still smiling, a grin that only grew larger as he realized she was watching him; for once he seemed genuinely carefree. She felt a surge of joy in her heart to see him so happy, after all they had been through, though he quickly sobered.

He slipped back under the blanket beside her, wrapping an arm around her and gathering her against him. Sighing happily, he said, "I must find a way to thank Kagome for such a wonderful gift." Somewhat ruefully, he added, "Someday we won't need such precautions."

"Mm," Sango murmured sleepily, resting her head on his shoulder.

"We'll destroy Naraku," he continued. "And we'll live our lives together, and have many, many children..."

"Yes," she agreed, lifting her head to look at him and give a wry grin. "Now that this is settled, I'm not going to let you weasel out of it that easily."

He chuckled softly. "I didn't think you would."

She let it rest at that, and they lapsed into comfortable silence. For now, at least, fear and uncertainty had been replaced by quiet contentment and newly solidified faith in each other, and that their shared quest would not be in vain, not so long as they both lived. There would be time, later, for worries and fears to creep back in... tomorrow, maybe, but not tonight.

Tomorrow, they would head out and continue the journey to find Naraku.

Tomorrow, together.

 

Morning found Sango sitting on the temple porch, polishing Hiraikotsu. Beside her lay her sword, polished and gleaming in the early morning light, and Kohaku's chain scythe. The chain was coiled neatly, the blade resting on top.

Miroku slipped out of the temple and came to sit beside her. "It's early yet," he said, "did you sleep at all?"

"A little," she admitted. She had been restless, her mind filled with thoughts of the future, and the past. It was as if a haze had lifted, and she could finally see clearly. What she had been lacking all along was faith. Faith in herself, and in her friends. She wondered if she had only trusted them more, if she had just trusted _herself_ more, if all of this could have been avoided.

Noticing her melancholy demeanor, Miroku teased, "Wait, was it that bad?"

Sango flushed with embarrassment. It hadn't been bad at all, but she did not have the courage to tell him so directly. Instead she shook her head and managed a quiet, "no."

"Care to do it again?" he asked, a little of his customary lechery sneaking into his voice.

"Not just yet," she said, hesitating, wondering how he might react to such a response. "I'm a little sore..."

Surprised: "I hurt you."

"No... it's more like... I've used muscles I didn't know I had."

He smiled, and sighed. "Ah, well. Can you blame me for trying?"

Giggling a little in spite of herself, Sango had to admit, "No, not really."

She let him pull her close beside him, Hiraikotsu sprawled across both their laps, and leaned in to rest her head against his shoulder... and did not pull away even as she heard the sounds of their friends stirring within the temple.

Let them see... see that their trial by fire had only strengthened their bond, that things had changed and, this time, the change was for the better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story has been honored multiple times at the InuYasha Fan Guild in the Best Miroku/Sango Romance category. It has also placed for Best Characterization, Best Angst, and Best Drama at the Feudal Association, and won numerous awards from Eikyuu Kosai (the Mir/San awards), including Best Canon, Best Drama, Best Multi-Chapter Fic, and Best Portrayal of Sango. My thanks go to those who have nominated/voted for me, or otherwise supported this fic (in spite of its questionable quality) throughout the years I spent writing it.
> 
> (While _Identity Crisis_ was originally finished in 2010, some minor updates were made in February 2013 to improve clarity and reduce repetitiveness.)


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